Innocence

I have been a victim of abuse since I was seven years old. My dad would abuse me every night because it gave him a thrill. Then you would think I get a break when I go to school, but I was bullied. My life was hell and I hated every second of it. I tried to run away several times, but came back for my mom. She was sick with cancer and my dad would not take care of her, so I had to.

Everyday I would look forward for those twenty minutes before I go to bed because those were the moments that I treasured the most. First off if is about the only twenty minutes I am awake that I am not being abused or bullied. Second, it was the only time I got to spend with my mom when I was not taking care of her. Third, it was when my mom would read my favorite story, Little Red Riding Hood, to me.

Unfortunately, my mom died when I was ten. She fought off the cancer for a while, but she could not hold on much longer. I knew she was only fighting for me. Although once my mom died, the abuse got worse. I thought I would be able to suck it up until I go to high school because I was going to be shipped off to a boarding school. Then when I turned twelve my dad thought, I was old enough to be raped. That was the last straw for me.

I began to plan how to get rid of my dad. I was a messed up child because instead of deciding to go to the police I planned to kill my father. I got up in the middle of the night and took my dad’s gun out of its hiding place. I went into his bedroom and shot him dead center in the head. I knew I had about ten minutes before the cops arrived. I hid the gun in the air vent and moved my dresser in front of the air vent. Then I put tape over my mouth. Locked myself in the closet tied up my feet and hands. I succeed with a minute to spare.

The police came running in my room and then they kicked open the closet door finding me tied up and crying. They helped me free and asked me what the suspect looked like and I told them it was a tall man, but could not see his face because he was wearing a mask. They believed every single lie I told them. All the pain he caused me was gone and I would never have to deal with him ever again.

The only problem was that I enjoyed killing him and I craved to kill others. Therefore, I decided every year I would kill someone who abuses or bullies others. Exactly a year later I sewed together a red hood like little red riding hoods to hide my face. I did everything the same, except for tying myself up in a closet, to the guy who bullied me.

This pattern continued throughout high school, but when I turned eighteen my craving for killing people increased, so I killed someone almost once a month. I have now become a famous serial killer and they gave me the name of the Little Red Murderer.

My next victim was a guy named Paul Hendricks who abuses his girlfriend. I have to learn his schedule and to do that I thought I would get to know his brother Drew since they live with each other. The problem was that I was not good at talking to boys especially good-looking ones. Drew was everything a girl wanted. He was like the football quarterback in high school and I am like the goofy freak that never gets noticed.

I finally got the courage to talk to him one day. Unfortunately, when I spent time with him I lost track of the big picture. I guess I fell in love with him. Something I never expected to happen in a million years. I thought I have grown to become heartless, but I was wrong.

Months have gone by without me killing a single person and rumors were that the Little Red Murderer’s kill spree was over. I hated the sound of that. I knew Paul and Drew’s schedule and it was time for me to stop fooling around.

It was a Friday night and I knew that Drew was not coming home until late. It was around nine when I snuck into the house in the dark waiting for Paul to walk through the door. When I saw the headlights on his car, I put my red hood up and took my gun out. The door opened and I took my shot, but he ducked.

Then the next thing I knew the bowl where they throw their keys into came flying towards my hand knocking the gun out of my hand. He was a fighter and I knew I would enjoy this. I gave him a devious smile and then ran for the gun. He then jumped on me knocking us both down to the floor. We wrestled awhile both at points trying to reach for my gun.

He eventually was able to wrap his arms around my neck trying to chock me, but I slammed him against the table, which broke. He was lying there on the broken table when I went for the gun. I finally had the gun in my possession, but when I turned back around, he was gone. I was then hit on the back of the head with one of the table legs, but not hard enough to knock me out. I stood up tired of all this fighting and rammed him into his glass trophy case. He was finally on the floor unconcious.

All of the sudden the lights came on and it took me by surprise. Then I heard the sound of a bag dropping to the ground. I knew it was Drew and I knew I had to shoot Paul and get out of here before he found out who I was. When I pulled the trigger I was about to run until I noticed Drew jumped in front of his brother and the bullet hit him on the leg.

I knew he would be okay, but I didn’t want to shoot him and would if it hit him somewhere else. I felt pain and guilt all at the same time. My eyes began to water and I haven’t felt like this since my mom died. I went to help Drew because if I left him there he would bleed to death.

When he looked at my face and noticed who I was I saw the disappointment on his face. It made me want to cry even more. “How could you kill all those people?” Drew asked.

“They deserve it. They cause pain everyday and I was just ridding the world of these monsters.” I explained myself. “Why would you take a bullet for your brother?” It was something I could not really comprehend.

“He may be abusive, but he took me in when I had no place to go. He is my brother and I would do anything for family. And he is not a monster, you are the monster.” When he said that I felt my heart broke into a million pieces.

I thought I could make it up to him by calling the police and turning myself in. I sat there next to Drew regretting everything while waiting for the police to show up. I couldn’t stop the tears from falling and I was feeling overwhelmingly emotional. So I decided to tell Drew how I felt by telling him that I loved him and oddly enough he said the same exact thing to me.

“Why are you still here?” He asked and I was confused.

“I’m turning myself in.” I was hard to understand behind the tears. Drew sat himself up a little bit and lifted up my head to look me in the eyes.

“No I need you to go run and I promise that one day we will meet again. We can’t be together if you are in jail.” I could hear the sirens coming. “Go now.” I gave him a kiss goodbye and fled the scene.

My killing days were over after that night. I was soon forgotten and I never did meet up with Drew again, but I chose not to because he deserved someone better than me. Sometimes you have to give up the people you love to save them.

I believe that if you want to go to heaven you have to be completely innocent and I do not think any of us are innocent by the time we die. I lost my innocence at the age of twelve and I unfortunately helped the man I loved lose his innocence. That is probably the one thing I regret the most on my journey to hell.