When Everything Feels Like the Movies

My heart stopped.
"Uhh, that's kind of a tricky question to answer," I laughed weakly.
Alan straightened up, eyes curious. "Do tell," he requested.
"Umm.. I'm uh.. I kind of.. I'mafraidofthedark," I blurted out. He giggled. "Is that it? My big bad guy afraid of the dark?" He teased me, poking my side.
I scowled. "I'm not afraid of the dark necessarily. Just... The things hiding IN the dark.. And since when did I become YOUR guy?" I challenged him, practically willing him to change the subject.
He blushed red to the roots of his hair, ducking his head down. I laughed.
"So why are you afraid of things in the dark?"
Alan's voice was serious, not at all joking. It wasn't even a question, it was a demand to know what happened and why.
I looked down into my lap, twisting my fingers together. "I-it.. It's a l-long story," I stuttered, trying to buy time.
"Hey," Alan's voice grew soft. The couch shifted as Alan moved closer to me. He took my hands in one of is and used the other to tilt my chin up so I would look at him. "You're okay. I'm here, I'll listen to you, okay?" I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. He squeezed my hands with both of his.
"Tell me, you'll be okay, I'm here," he soothed, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles.
I looked down again and shook my head no quickly, feeling the hot prick of tears behind my eyelids.
"Austin, I know I just met you a couple of days ago, but I care about you, okay? Just tell me, I swear I'll be here for you," he whispered, almost as if he were afraid that if he spoke any louder, I would break. I nodded quickly, feeling the taste of salt creep into my mouth before spilling down my cheeks.
"Oh Austin, don't cry," he pleaded. "Come'ere."
He wrapped his skinny arms around me, tugging me into a warm embrace. I let the tears fall silently onto his shirt, forming a small wet splotch where my face rested. He rubbed my back in small circles, murmuring into my ear. His soft warm breath stirred my hair and the rhythmic sound of his breathing calmed me enough to pull away.
I wiped my face with the back of the hand that Alan wasn't holding and smiled weakly.
"Thanks Alan. No one's really been there for me before."
"It's nothing. Now tell me, what're you afraid of," he looked me dead in the eyes and laced my fingers with his.
"Well, when I was younger, I used to get picked on a lot," I started, glancing over at him. He still had that impenetrable gaze locked on me. I continued.
"For being gay. For being big and lanky. For being different. I would always come home, upset, and my mom would take me to go get ice cream or, as I grew older, a coffee, and we'd talk. We'd talk about anything and everything. She was my best friend, she made me feel okay again. She encouraged me to start playing baseball, came to every game, cheered me on all the way. But, when I was like, seventeen, she passed away. She called me, twice, before but I was at work and I couldn't pick up." Tears started falling even harder into my lap. "Suddenly, she was just gone. I was on my own. I got picked on even more after she passed and I didn't have her there to help me."
Alan made a distressed noise and moved to pull me into another hug but I pushed his arms away.
"I'm not done yet." I took a deep breath and went on. "Towards the end of senior year, I was walking home at night. I can't remember why I was going through the alleys, but I felt like I was being followed so I walked a little bit faster. I heard footsteps and then I started to run. All of the sudden, I was tackled to the ground. I got beat up pretty bad, by the end of it, I was coughing blood and... It was just a mess." I shivered, phantom pains skittering across my skin. Alan's mouth was hung open a little and his eyebrows were mushed together.
"I heard them walk away but as they walked away, laughing, leaving me to bleed, I heard someone say 'That should teach that fag not to hit on me again.' It was Bryce. The cutest, sweetest guy I had ever met, the son of a pair of perfect Christian parents, one of the best choir students had organized an attack on me, the son of a dead woman. The dark hides evil beings and I just can't, to this day, be in the dark alone anymore or I'll have panic attacks that they're back, that they're going to finish the job this time."
I finished, tears falling thick. Alan looked completely heartbroken. His eyes held a mixture of pain, compassion and an overwhelming amount of protectiveness. He cupped my cheek, thumbing away the tears. Eventually, he gently grasped my face in his hands, pulling me forward.
His breath caressed my cheeks before he started kissing the tears away.
We sat like that for I don't know how long, until I stopped crying. Alan pressed our foreheads together, his eyes boring into mine.
"I'm so glad you told me," he said quietly. "I will never ever EVER let anyone hurt you like that ever again. I swear to whatever gods are listening that I, Alan Anthony Ashby will never leave you alone, Austin Carlile. No one deserves that."
I looked back at him and a tear fell from my eye. "Thank you," I breathed.
Our lips were so close, our breath mingling. All I had to do was push forward a little.. My tongue flicked out over my lips, wetting them. I saw Alan's eyes flicker down to glance at my lips and I decided to take a chance.
I pressed my lips against his, praying that he wouldn't reject me. He seemed shocked for a second and just as I was about to pull away, just as I was about to give up, he pushed back, kissed me back. His lips were so soft, I could just kiss him forever. I pulled him into my lap and we continued to make out on his couch. Eventually, I pulled away and smiled at him. Somehow, during the course of our little make out session, I had ended up on my back, on the couch, my legs danging off of it, with Alan laying on top of me.
He propped his chin up on his hand which was laying across my chest. "Feel better?" he grinned cheekily.
I kissed his soft ginger hair. "Much better," I murmured into the bright orange strands.
He lifted his head and gave me a quick kiss. "Good."
A moment passed.
"Shall I pop in another movie then? The other seems to have ended."