Outsiders

“Are you sure you don’t mind watching this again?”

“Of course I don’t mind, I know the Creature of the Black Lagoon is pretty much your fetish.”

I feigned a scowl at Kenneth, who was lying on my bed, settled into the pillows I had hurriedly thrown against the headboard when he had arrived earlier. Both of our parents were out of town for the weekend, and I knew he didn’t really like being alone all too much. And well, I was a little paranoid of leaving him alone in the house – I mean, I didn’t want him to consider doing anything that might hurt him in any way. Maybe I was a little over protective, but then, I’d rather not have a repeat of what had happened a few weeks previous.

Goddamn overprotective fool.

I laughed nervously as I sat on the side of the bed, Kenneth grinning up at me. I don’t know why I was so nervous, it wasn’t like it was the first time he had slept in my room, but then, it was the first time he had stayed the night since we became, well…a couple. Yeah, I guess that’s what we were, a couple. That sounded strange to say, but it felt so damn nice. I suppose that’s why I was so nervous, he wasn’t just my best friend Kenny who would stay up all night with me talking about bands, this was my boyfriend Kenny who I wanted to stay up all night holding – as lame as that sounded. I just wanted things to be nice, nice and with no interruptions to screw anything up.

“Anything in particular that you’re smiling at so lovingly, or am I going to have to fight that wall for your affection?”

I turned around a little flustered as Kenny pulled on my t-shirt a little. Taking the hint, I shuffled closer to him and lay down with a small sigh as I lifted my arm for him as he curled up into my side. Whether he was doing it intentionally or not, he rested his hand over my crotch. I fidgeted slightly as I became fully away of how close his body was to mine. He moved his head to rest on my chest as I flicked the switch off the lights, the title credits of the movie I had seen many a time before flashed upon the screen. Instinctively, I moved my free arm to run my fingers through his hair, Kenny nuzzling up to my touch as he shifted closer to me, and then pressed his hand a little harder on my crotch for a moment before lifting his hand again. I was starting to think this wasn’t just coincidence now.

“Kenny, I, are you o-kay-“ my voice rose at the end as he squeezed the growing bulge at the front of my pants as I whined a little, quieting down with a whimper as Kenny smiled almost innocently back up at me.

This wasn’t at all like him, but well, I can’t say I minded at all.

Sure, I wanted to do cute things with him like hold him all night, watch lame horror movies, and go out together – but then, there quite a few other things I wouldn’t at all mind doing. I tended to think about those things a lot. Well, maybe that was a little bit of an over statement. But when I was alone at nights, I had to amuse myself somehow.

“Anything wrong?” He looked up at me with those big eyes, feigning the innocence and purity he normally had – but there was something a little different in the way he looked up at me, and I wasn’t going to complain one bit.

“No…I…of course not.”

With a small cough, I nudged Kenneth’s hand – with a huff of annoyance on his part – and placed a cushion over the now rather obvious bulge in the front of my jeans. Maybe I shouldn’t let myself get turned on so quickly, but then again I was rather sensitive. And the fact Kenneth was the object of my most secret fantasies didn’t really help the situation. I couldn’t help but think about all the possibilities that could come of this. Maybe it wouldn’t be such a band that we had a house to ourselves for the weekend.

As the movie went on, I began paying less and less attention to the images flashing dimly in the background, and more to Kenneth’s hand, and how it was slowly travelling up my thigh. Every so often he would squeeze slightly, earning a small whimper from me, each time getting louder as he got higher up and closer to the point I so craved his touch. A fact that he was all too aware of.

Before I was quite aware of what was going on, Kenneth had shifted the pillow from my crotch and his long fingers were beginning to creep up to my belt buckle. His fingers slipped into my belt buckles, tugging them down slightly, before beginning to undo my buckle.

“Kenny-“ I gasped out loudly as he undid the buckle surprisingly quickly as I felt colour spread across my cheeks. I stuttered his name a few times, trying to form a single coherent thought in my mind. It was becoming a near impossible task as a thousand thoughts were spinning around my head. Of course, the righteous part of me was telling me to stop him, make sure he wasn’t doing something in the heat of the moment, something he’d regret. “Oh…oh” All I could do was whimper slightly as he pulled my jeans down my pale hips, his fingers rubbing slightly through the thin fabric that was separating him from fulfilling one of the many fantasies that had kept me awake at night. I moved my hips unintentionally to his touch, Kenneth looking up at me for the first time with a little glint in his eye before turning his attention to the issue at hand. Or rather, in his hand. I snapped back to reality as he began to nudge my underwear down, my eyes widening and my breath hitching as I fully came to realize what was going on.

“Kenny stop.”

I sat up with a jolt, Kenny looked wide eyed and scared like a deer in the head lights as he froze, his body rigid as he sat up next to me. My hands reached out for his skinny wrists as I pulled his body slightly towards mine. I dropped one hand slowly from his wrist, down the small uncommonly feminine curve on his torso and onto his thigh, before pulling his thigh over my hips – guiding his slender body over mine till his legs straddled hips as I rested my back against the head board.

“Oh my, Kenny…” I moved my hands back up from his thigh, fingers ghosting over his torso and his arm, small goose bumps rising in their wake as I chuckled slightly at his reaction. It seems he wasn’t too used to having his body touched like this, I did feel rather privileged that I was the first – and sure as hell I wouldn’t let him regret it. Abruptly, I moved my hand to his lower back and pressed his body hard against mind as I lent our foreheads together, our heavy breaths almost blanking out the movie that had now become background noise. “If we’re doing this here and now, it most surely needs to be you getting the attention.”

I pressed my lips down to his, slowly at first, like we had kissed hundreds of times before. His hand instinctively moving to my cheek, his thumb running across my jawline as he moved himself closer to me, his legs wrapped around my torso as his other hand moved to tangle in my already messy hair. I kept one hand resting on his lower back as I pulled back from the kiss, but my lips not leaving his skin as I quickly kissed down his jaw. As I kissed down his jawline, enticing small whimpers from Kenneth, my hand moved down his body in sync. My hand slipped down the loose waist band of his pants, squeezing his ass slightly as Kenneth jumped slightly before wrapping his slender arms around my back and pulling his body to mine.

“John…I-“ Kenneth gasped out, whimpered as I bit down lightly on his neck, sucking softly at the skin there. “You don’t have to do this, if you don’t want to, I just wanted to make you feel good, you don’t have to for me…” his voice trailed off as my lips left his skin, pulling his body away slightly so I could look him in the eyes, despite all that was happening, a small frown on my lips. I just wish he’d see himself like I did.

“Hey Kenny,” I tilted his face up to mine as I rested my forehead against his, my fingers softly caressing his cheek as he scrunched up his face a little.

“Sorry for ruining the moment-“ I cut him off with a soft kiss, a small smile changing his features as I pulled away. When he smiled, he really did look so fucking beautiful.

“Of course I want to do this, you’re fucking perfect.” I moved my thumb across his cheek, Kenneth leaning his head into my head. He always liked that, I think it gave him comfort, comfort that I was actually there and wasn’t going to run away. With a small smile up at me through his messy hair, Kenneth threw his arms loosely around my neck and pressed his lips back onto mine. The hand still resting on his lower back instinctively pulled him closer, a small whimper coming from the both of us as his crotch brushed over mine, even the tiniest amount of friction sending us reeling for more. I slipped my hand under the hem of his t-shirt, Kenneth shivering slightly as I ran my fingers over the soft skin. I started pulling the loose material of his shirt up, exposing his lower torso and back.

I pulled back from the kiss slowly, not quite wanting to be separated from him just yet, even if it was just for a few moments. As I began to lift up his t-shirt, he looked up at me with apprehensive eyes once again. I knew what he was worried about, I knew why he didn’t want me to see his chest – but it wasn’t as if I hadn’t seen those marks before. I’d seen them on his arms too much, far too much for someone as perfect as him. They wouldn’t change how I saw him, and it wouldn’t change the fact that he was the only person I wanted in that way.

I dropped my hands to his hips, holding onto them as I quickly rolled us both over, his arms still clinging to my back as I laid him down onto my messy bed sheets, pulling his top swiftly over his head before it hit the pillow. I sat up slowly, my chest rising and falling heavily as I knocked his shirt and my already long discarded jeans off of the bed, flicking the long forgotten movie off before turning back to Kenneth – who was covering the lower part of his torso with his arms. I could see a few light scars over the top of his chest, but he seemed particularly scared to let me any lower.

“Hey…” I murmured, running my hands across his tense arms before settling atop his and linking our fingers together. “You don’t have to be scared of letting me see. Old scars, are old scars – they don’t bother me, and they sure as hell don’t make me love you any less.” I planted a soft kiss over a small scar at the top of his arm. I felt Kenneth’s arm rest on my shoulder as I looked up at him; colour flooding through his normally pale cheeks as he looked down at his body. Lifting myself up, I slid myself further down his body, resting myself between his slightly parted legs as I smiled up at him through my messy hair. I reached out for his arms, tugging them away slowly until they dropped to his sides.

I tried to repress the wave of sadness that washed over me as I saw his lower abdomen, or rather, the hundreds of little raised, red marks littering his pale skin. Some were longer, some deeper, yet all of them were something that should have never happened. I blinked motionlessly at them for a few seconds, but I wasn’t going to let myself get bothered by them. I knew Kenneth was scared they’d put me off, but they were a part of him – and I loved every part of him.

Slowly, I dropped my head, brushing my lips against one of the many red marks that littered his stomach as I felt his stomach tense beneath me, but I continued slowly. Working from scar to scar, I let my lips softly kiss each one of them as I reached out my hand for Kenneth’s, our fingers lacing together as I slowly felt his body relax underneath my touch. I looked up at him, my chin resting on his stomach. I was expecting to see him hiding behind his hair again, but it appeared that he had been watching me quietly – but it was his smile that made it that much better. He looked so content and safe, and I was more than happy I could give him that.

“Your scars don’t define who you are.” I spoke softly as I continued to kiss slowly down his chest, the hand that wasn’t entwined with Kenneth’s began to pull at his loose pants – tugging them down his slender hips. “I still think you’re beautiful-“ I paused looking up at him. “-and I don’t ever want to lose my best friend.” Kenneth smiled down at me, his hand reached down to my face, caressing my cheek as I grinned up at him. “Now just relax and close your eyes.”

I waited till I saw his eyes flutter shut, a small smile still on his face as his chest rose and fell softly. I lifted myself on my elbows, which were rested either side of his skinny frame, and shifted myself down his body. Slowly, but deliberately, I traced my finger down his stomach to the waistband of his underwear, pulling at the elastic before snapping it back down at his skin with a little wince on his part. I flickered my eyes back up to his, but the smile was still there, and that was enough reassurance that I needed. What I was about to do may be similar in action to what I had done to Tim, but in emotion it was a world away. I wanted to make Kenneth feel good, and goddamn it I would.

I rubbed, slowly at first, through the thin material of his underwear – even the slightest touch making Kenneth’s hips jerk up to my touch, and a small little whimper to come from him. I began kissing along his thighs, sucking at the soft skin slightly as he began to move slightly beneath me, already his moans beginning to get louder. And I had to admit, I was enjoying every bit of it. Pulling down his underwear, I looked up at him one last time to see him chewing his bottom lip, his eyes still shut, and god, it was one fucking nice site.

“Oh and remember, there’s no need to stay quiet.”

I flicked the tip with my tongue quickly, Kenneth letting out a loud gasp and a sharp intake of breath. I couldn’t help but smirk at how quick he was reacting to everything, it was a hell of a nice site. Resting my hands on his thighs, I dipped my head down, taking him all into my mouth with a small groan. My hand wrapped around the base, my fingers squeezing ever so slightly. Kenneth reacted with a loud groan and a harsh buck up into my mouth. It was rather handy I had a pretty much non-existent gag reflex, after all. Slowly, I began to bob my head up and down, my tongue flicking the tip every other bounce. His gasps and moans were filling my small room. His hands fisted the sheets beside my head as I continued to move my hand and head in sync.

“Oh, oh god…oh.” I moved my eyes up to watch Kenneth, his body writhing and hips bucking up into my mouth, as his eyes were squeezed shut and his lip firmly planted between his teeth. Despite the huge amount of weight he had lost, there was something about the way his arms tensed that still showed a strange sort of strength, and hell, that turned me on more than I should admit.

Sharply, I lifted my head up, Kenneth hissing at the sudden loss of contact and began moving his hips up harshly. Maybe another time I would tease, and oh there would be plenty of other times, but for now I would give him what he wanted – and what I so wanted to give him. My hand wrapped around the base once again, I dragged my tongue slowly down his length, then back up, and again and again. By the noises coming from his mouth, he was more than enjoying this, and that made me feel all kinds of nice things.

I jumped slightly as I felt his hand twist into my messy hair, pushing my head down further and making the movements of my head quicker and more rapid. Oh my, it seemed he did have a lot of need.

“John…John, god, I think I’m gonna-“ he stuttered, still not being able to form a complete line. It was quite a nice fact that I was making him do that – his mind, usually so intelligent, a jumble of thoughts, feelings and sensations. Although he may be enjoying it, I wasn’t quite ready to let him get to that before I at least got my share.

Pulling back with a gasp of air, I fell back onto my knees as Kenneth whined and whimpered, his hands trying to grasp me back down. I let out a small chuckle as both of us tried to catch our breath. Flashing Kenneth a quick grin, I pushed his pants down the rest of his skinny legs and onto the floor, my underwear soon joining the pile of discarded clothes before I crawled back up the bed.

It seemed Kenneth had let his inhibitions go as soon as I had moved up the bed, he wrapped his arms around my back and pulled his lips roughly down to mine. I gasped out into the kiss as the sensation of his skin under mine flashed through me. I let my hand slide down his body, my finger tips touching his soft skin as he pressed himself into my with a groan. The friction between us was killing me, I needed it, I needed him. As my hand found his ass, I lifted it slightly, squeezing it a little before pulling back with a grin.

“I thought you were a boob guy?” Kenneth laughed timidly, smiling up at me. His smile was so goddamn infectious; I couldn’t help but grin back.

“But you’ve got one hell of an ass Kenny.” He giggled slightly as I winked at him, shaking his head as he reached up to kiss me softly.

I reached out for a pillow I had earlier knocked away in my haste for him, lifting up his ass and slipping the pillow underneath. I know this was going to hurt, at least, hurt a lot for him – but I really was hoping he could get past the pain, after all, it was going to feel pretty fucking good. I could hear Kenneth’s breaths beginning to get a little quick, he always did tend to do that when he was nervous; and in situations like this, it was only natural. I reached out for his arm, running my hand softly down his arm and offering a small smile of comfort up to him. Spreading his legs slightly, I knelt in between his bent legs and reached out for the lube and the condom somewhere in my dressing table.

Leaning down, I rested my forehead with his, his sweet breath washing over my face as he smiled weakly up at me.

“Are you sure you want to do this, Kenny?”

“Of course, I trust you, John.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too, always-“ I cut Kenneth off by kissing him quickly, colour rising through his cheeks as I pulled back.

Lifting myself back up, I spread his legs a little further and let my hands fall down to his hips, gripping onto his prominent hip bones before quickly smiling at him. Pushing in slowly, Kenneth grunted in pain as I slowly moved myself in. H let out a gasp of what I assumed was pain, and I froze completely as concern washed over my features. But before I could speak, Kenneth reached out for my hand and squeezed it, a small smile on his face as he pulled my body back down to his. Slowly I began to move inside of him, Kenneth still whimpering ever so slightly as I moved. I couldn’t help but moan loudly as I pushed myself inside of him fully, his warmth and tightness surrounding me completely as my fingers dug into his hips. He was all that I could feel, he was taking over every one of my senses. God-fucking-dammit.

Kenneth pulled me down to him as I began to thrust a little faster, throwing his arms around my neck and pulling me in for another kiss as he started to move his hips to match mine. I let out a load groan as his teeth scraped against my bottom lip, his nails digging into my back as he arched up into me. I pulled away from the kiss quickly, dipping my head into the crook of his neck as I bit down softly at first, Kenneth’s moans encouraging my thrusts, leaving a blooming mark at the bottom of his neck. As I looked down at it, a feeling washed through me that was more than nice – he was my Kenny, my Kenny and everyone would know.

“Oh fuck, John, there again-“ I snapped my head up to Kenneth, his head arching back into the pillow and his mouth hanging open – pleasure the only thing on his face. “Right fucking there.” I was taken aback at his profanity, but hell, I wasn’t going to fucking complain.

As I lifted myself back up onto my knees, his slender legs wrapped around my waist, pulling me into him as I gripped onto his hips. I thrusted again and again where he had told me to, his hips moving to meet mine like they were made to match my own. Our heavy breaths and moans were the only thing filling the small space of my room. The feeling of his skin under mine was like nothing I had ever felt before, the way his hand fit into mine even in this moment was perfect, everything was perfect – he was perfect.

I knew I was so close, so fucking close, but I wasn’t about to let go without Kenneth getting his release, one that was rather well deserved. I wrapped my hand around his length, moving my hand in quick jerking movements as Kenneth’s back arched up to my touch.

“Oh god, John…” his voice trailed off as he let out a load yell of pleasure, my hips thrusting one last time as he came messily, a jumbled mix of profanities, moans, and my name coming from his lips as he writhed beneath me, his chest rising and falling as I rode it out with my own fast paced thrusts.

Confusion washed over me as Kenneth began to move himself, fidgeting a little before pulling himself up and wrapping his arms around me – resting on my knees as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. Slowly, he began to move up and down on my length, matching my sloppy thrusts. I felt his lips kiss along my shoulder, across to my neck where I felt his tongue flick out against my skin – my head falling back with a loud groan.

The feeling of Kenneth moving himself on top of me was way too fucking much for me to handle. My hands gripped his sides as I thrusted a few more sloppy times, before letting go. My nails dug into his back as I yelled out his name over and over, his mouth still sucking at the soft skin at my neck driving me wild as my breaths heaved. I continued thrusting lazily until I had rode it out, my hands clinging onto Kenneth’s slender body. Sure, I hadn’t had sex with thousands of girls, but out of anything and anybody, no one could ever be as good as him. He was my Kenny, and he was perfect in every way.

Falling back against the bed, Kenneth fell to my side, his chest rising and falling with equal speed to my own as we both lay there panting in the dim light of my room. I rolled over, turning to face him with a smile on my face. I ran my fingers up his arm and he instinctively shuffled closer to my touch, his hand coming up to intertwine with mine as he grinned back up to me.

“Well that was…nice,” he spoke shyly still, his face red and hair messy – and honestly, I had never seen a nicer site in my whole life.

“More than nice if you ask me.” I smirked down at him, my eyes tracing over his naked body lying next to mine. Despite all his fears about me seeing his body, not that I hadn’t seen his bare chest before, his body was utterly perfect to me. Those fears he had needn’t be, not at all. He was all I wanted. I couldn’t help but smile a little when I saw the numerous love bites littered across his collarbones and neck; it was nice to see that. Maybe I was a little possessive, but fuck, it was hot.

Quietly I reached for a cloth I had littered across my clothes, cleaning us both up swiftly as Kenneth watched my every move. He seemed fascinated with how I moved my hands, even as I cleaned him up. My fingers brushing over his chest, his neck, his hips, he followed them everywhere. Where with others I would feel self-conscious, with him, I just felt safe. Safe, and happy. Happier than I had ever been in my life, I was certain he was the key to my happiness – and I would never lose him.

Once I had cleaned him up, I ushered him off the bed for a moment, tidying up the sheets and fluffing up the pillows before throwing back the cover, patting the space next to me.

“You’re such a dork sometimes yknow, John.” Kenneth laughed as he slid into the bed next to me, instantaneously curling up under my open arm and resting his head on my chest while I shook my head and laughed quietly at him, kissing his forehead as he wrapped his free arm around me.

“Yeah, but I’m your dork.” I nudged him slightly as we both laughed, Kenneth settling in with a small content sigh.

Everything just felt so right, just so perfect. Like every moment in my life had been leading up to this, every other person, every other moment was insignificant. I was too blind to see the person who I needed the most had been right in front of me this whole time.

“You should come to my gig this weekend, Kenny, you can be my groupie and everything.” I winked at him as he sat up, resting on his elbows as he laughed softly at me, looking down at me with so much emotion in his eyes. I wasn’t worthy of it after everything I’d done, but hell, it made me happier than anything.

“I feel happy now John, you know? Happier than I have ever felt in my whole life, and that’s all because of you. You’re perfect, you’re amazing, you’re everything to me, I love you so much, you know that right?” He looked at me with those eyes, those eyes that pulled me in every time, I really was his dork.

I lifted my hand up, cupping his face with one hand as he smiled like always, his warmth spreading through me. “You have no idea how happy that makes me, you deserve all the happiness in the world and I am glad I can give that to you. Though you may not see it, you’re beyond perfect, I’ll never get tired of calling you perfect. I hope you begin to see the good in yourself, because I see plenty. You’re the love of my life Kenny, the love of my dreams. I love you, my love. Thank you.”

Before I could carry on, Kenneth threw his arms around me, his skinny frame pushing me down against the sheets as he buried his head in my shoulder. As he looked up, I saw him smile like I had never seen him smile before, and it was the most beautiful I’d ever seen him.

“Forever will be you and me-“ he started, curling up into my side one again as my lips brushed against his forehead.

“And everything’ll be alright. I love you my Kenny, always.”