Sequel: A New Start ›
Diary Entries
August 29th, 2013
Today has been just like any other. I've been a bit irritated, though, but that's probably because I'm on my period. Everything seems more dramatic when I am... Anyways, my day started nicely. I got to drive Mila and myself to school, with my mom in the passenger seat, of course. Mila has finally gotten to see how good of a driver I've become. The last time I drove with her in the car, I almost wrecked. Lets just say that I'm terrible when it comes to left turns and that my dad isn't too great on giving direction. Speaking of my dad, he is making me feel like shit. Every chance that I get to see him, which isn't too often, by the way, because he works so much, all he does is give me an order. I'll say "Hey Daddy. How was your day?" and he'll reply with, "Good. There's dishes to be done." or "Long. Why don't you help your mom clean around the house." or "Get a job. Your car payment is due soon." He expects me to do so many things at once and it's frustrated. My mom used to be the same way, but she's tried to do it less since I've told her about how anxious it makes me.
So, yesterday, I brought up a boy and I can't seem to get him off of my mind. I've made him a character, now. His name is Mike and I'll elaborate more about him this time. Actually, I'll just completely start over... Mike is someone that I've known since I moved to this town. (Which was 7 years ago, by the way.) He's always been the cute class clown and the badass kid that never did his work. He was Mila's first drug dealer and is still dealing to this day. (Her first time smoking was with him in middle school.) He's not the type of boy that someone would bring home to their parents. BUT he's interested in me and that always lights a spark in my mind. Once someone likes me, I immediately imagine myself with that person. Typically, I'd be grossed out by whatever I daydreamed, but with Mike, when I imagined him and I together, you know... as a couple, it didn't seem bad. Probably because he's a cute, bad boy. He never seemed to really notice me until this year. This year and last was when I gained confidence, finally after all these years. He's good friends with Demi and he texted her about me the other night! Here's basically what was said:
--
Mike: Melanie's gorgeous!
Demi: Lol, she's cute! She said that she likes white boys, by the way! (I can't believe she told him that I said that, haha.)
Mike: Well, that's good to hear. Now, you've got to put in a good word for me and I'll do the rest. I just want a nice girl with good intentions.
Demi: Okay, you've just got to promise to never hurt her. I don't think you're that kind of guy, though.
Mike: To be honest, I would never. Also, I'm not trying to just fuck her and leave her. I'm not like that. I could care less about sex. I just want something real and genuine.
---
So... That got me really happy and weird feeling and all fuzzy n shit.
Also, extremely nervous. Mike is a popular kid and he's friends with all of the hot blondes and rich kids and blah, blah, blah.
Plus, he just broke up with the prettiest girl in my school and he was head over heels for her. He kissed the ground she walked on. He loooooved her. That freaks me out.
Also, I have never had a boyfriend before. I'm the most virgin person that I know. So, I'm nervous about that, as well.
I'm nervous about his drug dealing and drinking, and partying, and flirting.
Like I said, he's a bad kid. He's cute and really fucking funny and super sweet. (Three of my weaknesses.)
I don't know... I guess I've just got to go with the flow.
I'll try to keep you updated. :-)
So, yesterday, I brought up a boy and I can't seem to get him off of my mind. I've made him a character, now. His name is Mike and I'll elaborate more about him this time. Actually, I'll just completely start over... Mike is someone that I've known since I moved to this town. (Which was 7 years ago, by the way.) He's always been the cute class clown and the badass kid that never did his work. He was Mila's first drug dealer and is still dealing to this day. (Her first time smoking was with him in middle school.) He's not the type of boy that someone would bring home to their parents. BUT he's interested in me and that always lights a spark in my mind. Once someone likes me, I immediately imagine myself with that person. Typically, I'd be grossed out by whatever I daydreamed, but with Mike, when I imagined him and I together, you know... as a couple, it didn't seem bad. Probably because he's a cute, bad boy. He never seemed to really notice me until this year. This year and last was when I gained confidence, finally after all these years. He's good friends with Demi and he texted her about me the other night! Here's basically what was said:
--
Mike: Melanie's gorgeous!
Demi: Lol, she's cute! She said that she likes white boys, by the way! (I can't believe she told him that I said that, haha.)
Mike: Well, that's good to hear. Now, you've got to put in a good word for me and I'll do the rest. I just want a nice girl with good intentions.
Demi: Okay, you've just got to promise to never hurt her. I don't think you're that kind of guy, though.
Mike: To be honest, I would never. Also, I'm not trying to just fuck her and leave her. I'm not like that. I could care less about sex. I just want something real and genuine.
---
So... That got me really happy and weird feeling and all fuzzy n shit.
Also, extremely nervous. Mike is a popular kid and he's friends with all of the hot blondes and rich kids and blah, blah, blah.
Plus, he just broke up with the prettiest girl in my school and he was head over heels for her. He kissed the ground she walked on. He loooooved her. That freaks me out.
Also, I have never had a boyfriend before. I'm the most virgin person that I know. So, I'm nervous about that, as well.
I'm nervous about his drug dealing and drinking, and partying, and flirting.
Like I said, he's a bad kid. He's cute and really fucking funny and super sweet. (Three of my weaknesses.)
I don't know... I guess I've just got to go with the flow.
I'll try to keep you updated. :-)