For the Love Of...

We didn't make it to the mall because Ainsley fell asleep and I didn't want to disturb her.

"I'll put her in her crib." Zane says standing up from sitting on my bed and leaving for what feels like only a few short seconds. He returns to my room and sits in his exact same spot next to me on my bed.

"Pandora..What I said last night, about still loving you, I meant it." He says looking straight ahead.

We sit in silence until Zane says, "You don't have to say it back..I just wanted to let you know how I felt in person." He finishes this time examining me.

"I do." I whisper very softly, but I know Zane can hear me because of how quiet it is in my house.

I look at him in his green eyes and see them light up through his fashionable glasses. He smiles and I do as well.

"I want to be a family, Pandora. I really do. I want to take care of Ainsley. I want to help in any and every way possible." He says sincerely and seriously.

"Me too." I say grinning feeling like everything he's says is unrealistic.

"I love you Pandora. And even though yesterday was the first time I met Ainsley, I love her more than I've ever love anything or anyone." He blinks hard. I've never seen him get emotional like this before. I reach my hand to his back and rub it in small circles, something I'd always do to make him feel batter when we were together. He looks at me and has a flinching half smile.

"I love you too." I say shyly blushing a bit. Zane places his hand behind my body not touching me at all, but then he leans in towards me so that our noses are touching. He teases me with a quick brush against my lips. I grab the back of his head forcing a hard kiss.

What am I doing? I just hated him yesterday and today we're kissing? I hate myself for this..But I love him. I think. Maybe I just have sexual frustration built up. Or maybe its that I've been wanting this perfect family and I was willing to anything to get it.

Letting these thoughts wonder and overtake me, I push Zane off of me with such force, it makes him fall off my bed with a loud thud. He quickly rearranges himself and stands in front of me, eyes wide with confusion. I stand up as well but look down at his shoes.

"I don't want another Ainsley. Things with us, can't go too far." I say honestly looking up at Zane whose face is starting to look more understanding. He nods and looks up at the ceiling then back to my eyes.

"I've gotta get home." He says reaching into his pockets for his car keys.

We stand in silence for a while until Zane brings me into a passionate hug and says, "I love you. See you when I get out of school tomorrow." He lets go and I follow him into Ainsley's room.

He looks down at Ainsley and whispers something I couldn't hear and kisses her cheek.

"Bye Pandora." Zane smiles and leaves Ainley's room beginning to walk down the stairs. I smile and wave as he makes it downstairs and opens the front door leaving.

Zane. I'm going to make him mine. I just need to start talking and I mean REALLY talking to him and stop being such an awkward person who hardly talks to him but has so much to say.