I'll Be Your Safety

Quick authors note before you start reading this chapter.
​Sometime in the chapter, i'll tell you to start this song:
​
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deYwGKF-Sfs​​ ​​
​
​Open it up right now and let it load as your reading, and when I tell you to press play, start it somewhere in the middle of the song. Maybe around one minute or so. Trust me, it's like having background music to make it more dramatic, but it's not...​​​​​​​​​​​​
​
​Just trust me on this one. If it dosent make you shiver with feels, then I don't even know why i'm doing this anymore.
​
​Well, sorry for the ramble. Hurry along now and READ!
​
​​​​​​​​​​​​​
​
​​​​​3 Months Later

Niall had been sick with the flu for the past few days. The moment I stepped in the door from work, Maura was almost always there, watching Ethan for us. My job wasn’t flexible at all, and didn’t let me take days off to watch the two of them. Luckily, Maura came to the rescue. She watched Ethan while I was at work, and usually left some dinner in the fridge.

“Hello, Liv. How was work?” She stood up, smiling.

“It was great, thanks.”

“Well, I better get going, I have company coming for eight and I’ve yet to make dinner. By the way, there’s some soup in the fridge.” She picked her purse up off the floor.

“Thank you so much, Maura.”

“It’s no problem. Anything to help the two of you out.” She laughed “See ya.”

I placed my purse on the counter, then slipped off my jacket. From the other room I heard Niall call out. “Olivia?”

“Yeah?” I replied, walking over to his door. I opened it, and smiled when I saw him lying on his bed.

“Can you pass me the gross medicine? My mum was cleaning up and tucked it away somewhere in the bathroom.”

I smiled “Sure.” I walked into the washroom, and opened up the medicine cabinet. I rifled through the many bottles, not finding the one I was looking for.

“Do you think she put it under the sink?” I called out, bending over and opening up the cabinet under the sink.

“Maybe. You know her, she puts things in the most random places.”

I started pulling things out, paper towel, toilet paper, Benadryl, tampons. Tampons. Shit. I tried to think back to the last time I used them, and couldn’t remember.I picked the medicine up, walking out to Niall on shaky legs.

“Ni, I- I’m late.” I stuttered. I could feel my heart racing in my chest.

“What?”

“I’m late. I’m three months late. At least I think it’s been three months.”

“You mean-“

“I mean, it might not be for sure, it’s always been really spotty, and never on time. I mean, once I missed a whole six months.” I laughed dryly “But what if-“ I trailed off, trying to gather my thoughts.

Niall sat up in bed “Do you have a test?”

“No, I don’t.” I rung my hands out. “I’m gonna go the pharmacy and get one. I’ll- I’ll be back.” The expression I wore on my face could be tagged as either happiness or sorrow. I just couldn’t tell which one.

Hastily I snatched up my keys and bag, taking the stairs instead of the elevator. I wanted more time out of that house to think.

When it finally sunk in what I was going to do, I felt a small surge of excitement. A new baby! I was thrilled. Sure, I wasn’t married yet, or in a relationship for that matter, but Niall was an amazing dad; and I knew he would be for this little guy, too. If I was having another baby right now, it would be Niall who I would want to have helping me. Plus, I always wanted to have my kids close in age. I always envied my friends who wad sisters only two years older; they formed such a close bond with each other. I wanted Ethan to have the same experience.

I realized I was already at the pharmacy, so I took a deep breath and opened the door, both excited and dreadful at the same time. I had no idea what aisle the tests were in; and I had no intention of asking anyone, so I decided to wander the aisles instead.

I finally found them, in the back corner of the shop. Intently I scanned the selection, completely oblivious to which one I should buy. As I reached for a pack of two Clearblue Ultra Pregnancy Tests, someone called out my name.

“Liv!” A familiar voice called. I froze, and practically leaped away from the display. I looked to my right, where Zayn was walking up the aisle. “Hey, I thought it was you.” He smiled.

“Hey, Zayn what are you doing ‘round here?” I asked. His apartment was on the other side of London.

“Oh, I was just visiting a friend. How about you? You just picking up-“ He paused, eyeing the box I held in my hand. I glanced down, and noticed I had actually grabbed the box of tests, instead of dropping them. Shit. Mission abort! Mission abort!

“I-uh.” I held the box up. “Well, isn’t that silly. I- um.” I couldn’t think of a cover story, so I ceased my attempts of concealing my true motive.

“I- I was late, and Niall and I thought maybe I was, you know. But I wasn’t sure, so I- I just- It was one time, so I don’t think its for sure, but I didn’t-“ I was stuttering, so Zayn cut me off.
“Hey, no explanation needed.”

“Can you keep it a secret? For now? Just please for the love of god don’t tell any of the boys.” I begged

“Don’t worry. It’s a locked vault.” He pretended to lock his mouth and throw away the key. “Anyways, I’ll see ya round sometime. Tell Niall to text me.” He waved, then disappeared behind a row of shelves. I let out a long breath, mentally cursing myself. Nice save, Olivia. I thought sarcastically. I managed to buy the damn things and make it out of there without getting seen again. As I started towards the apartment I felt a gaze on my back. At first I shook it off, and just flicked the hood of Niall’s sweater over my head. But once I was almost home I turned around. There were a few men holding large cameras following me about ten feet back. I cursed, then sped up, managing to dip into the building without any of them catching up to me.

Once I was at the front door, I chickened out. I mean, I wanted to know whether or not I was pregnant, yes. But something was telling me not to find out. I took a deep breath, regained my confidence, and then opened the front door. Naturally, Niall wasn’t there, so I padded over to his room, the box tightly in my hand.

“I’m- I’m just gonna-“ I motioned towards the washroom. Niall shot me a reassuring smile, and I turned on my heel and walked into the bathroom.

Niall

I could barely think straight, since my head was already pounding. But when Olivia mentioned that she might be pregnant again? It was even harder to concentrate. On one side, I was hoping it was just a hunch, and that we wouldn’t be expecting another baby. I would feel awful if I was the person to cause her stress again. After everything Olivia’s been through, she really didn’t need something like this adding even more tension. But another side of me wanted to have a new little one, to see what they would look like, and talk like, and do when their older. It was the sheer curiosity that catered to my more hopeful side.

Queue music…. NOW! (No seriously, use that link I gave y’all)

Olivia walked back into the room, her face void of any emotion. She then smiled, and held up the test “It’s negative.” She sighed. “I’m probably just late randomly.”

“Isn’t there another one you can do? To be sure?”

“No, the other one was opened. I decided against trusting it.” She sighed.

“I would hug you, but-“ I shrugged.

She smiled, and crawled into bed beside me anyways. She rested her head on my chest, and I stroked her hair. I heard her sniffle slightly. Even though I knew she was crying, I didn’t say a word; I just continued stroking her hair, comforting her as she cried. I felt her body shake with emotion, and she curled up beside me, her arms tightly clinging onto my torso and her legs tucked neatly beside her. Her hair was soft, and it smelled like apples.

I kissed the top of her head “I’m sorry.” I mumbled. I didn’t realize she would get so upset over this.

She replied “Me too.”

My phone buzzed on my side table, and reached to answer it. It was a text from Zayn, asking about the baby.

What do you mean?

I saw her buying tests in the pharmacy. I was out meeting up with an old friend

Zayn, she’s not pregnant. The tests were negative

Oh. I’m sorry, mate.

It’s alright. Liv’s pretty beaten up about it though.

Send her my best wishes, xox

Will do

I tossed my phone onto the other side of the bed, managing to sufficiently cradle Liv’s head on my shoulder as I did so.

We sat like that for almost an hour until Ethan zipped in, holding a toy plane above his head. When he caught sight of Liv, his face fell.

“Mommy?” He stood on is tippy toes to see her. “Why mommy sad?” His sorrowful eyes searched mine, and I patted the bed beside me. Ethan got the hint, dropping his plane on the ground and climbing up onto the bed. He crawled towards us on all fours, and stopped near my legs. Olivia, not lifting her head, raised an arm up, and Ethan crawled into the small open space between the two of us. He, too hugged my torso, and I stretched my arm around Olivia, pulling the duo closer to me, if that was even possible. I tugged part of the blanket over Liv’s shaky shoulders, careful not to put it over Ethan’s face. He rolled over, and nestled his head in my lap. He placed one hand under his head, and the thumb of the other was promptly nestled in his mouth. His eyes closed, and he fell asleep, shielding him from Olivia’s despondent sobs.​​