Goodbye Harry?

Billie’s excuses were swiftly interrupted. “Mike we were just-“
“I don’t wanna hear it. I’ve seen enough to know what you were “just” doing.”
“Honestly-”
“You’re damn lucky it wasn’t Tre who walked through that door right now. But it probably should have been; he deserves to find out what his best friend and his girlfriend are getting up to when he’s not around! What the fuck is Tre to you two?! And Adrienne? Don’t they mean anything?! ” Mike threw his hands up in the air.
“Listen to me Mike,” Billie pleaded seriously, hating the voice in his mind who’d let him forget them. “It just happened. We were just talking and you know what happens, we just-”
“It shouldn’t have happened and we’re sorry. It’s honestly not what you think.” It was Harry who interrupted this time, her voice calm as she looked at Mike obviously feeling ashamed. “I would never hurt Tre-”
“Doesn’t fucking look that way.”
“I know, I know. But I can promise you that it won’t happen again. It was a mistake… everybody’s fucked it up at sometime, and this was one of ours.”
Mike looked at them both. “A mistake?”
“Totally,” she told him firmly as Billie nodded.
Mike shook his head. “Just keep your fucking hands off each other, alright? Cos next time it might be Tre that catches you.”
“There won’t be a next time.” Harry assured him.
Just then the door opened and Tre smiled as he saw them all. “What’s this? A surprise birthday party?”
Mike’s phone began to ring and he gave them one last warning look as her went out in to the back garden to answer it.
“I’m just gonna go out for a while.” Billie felt he had to get out. The atmosphere was killing him. And Tre had no clue about any of it. “I’ll be back later. Want pizza or something?”
“Large.” Tre grinned “With extra cheese.”
“Fine.” Billie glanced at Harry. “See ya later.”
“Ok.”
He hurried out, grabbing his keys from the table, and got in to his car. Leaning his head against the headrest, he looked up at the ceiling and closed his eyes. Exhaling deeply, his mind raced. Well that wasn’t meant to happen, he thought. Mike was still doubtful but Billie was sure he had believed them. Aside from that, he couldn’t help but smile at the fact that Harry had kissed him back. Did she really not want it to happen or was that for Mike’s benefit? He wasn’t sure. As much as Tre and Adrienne clouded his feelings for Harry, he still wanted her.
Now, more than ever.
***
He’d given it half an hour before driving back with Tre’s requested pizza. He smiled bitterly as he thought of what Mike would say. Pizza won’t make everything alright. But perhaps Tre would think that way?
Just as he put the key in the door, it burst open and he caught a glimpse of Harry’s tear stained face as she pushed passed him causing him to drop the pizza box.
“What the fuck-?”
He turned to see her drive away, tyres squealing.
Shit, he thought. He knows.
He turned pale. Taking a gulp and picking up the box he strode in to see Tre pacing up and down the room with an uncharacteristically angry look upon his face. He didn’t acknowledge Billie’s presence.
“What the hell was that about?” Billie asked trying to keep the expression on his face neutral.
Tre stopped pacing when he reached the other side of the room and covered his face with his hands, taking a deep breath.
“The fact that I’m a fucking forgetful bastard that doesn’t give a shit about anyone but himself. That’s what.”
Billie felt his whole body relax, realising he’d been tense. He doesn’t know, he thought. He could have laughed if the situation hadn’t have been so serious.
“What are you on about?”
“The moment you left, she asked me why I forgot about taking her to the garage. I told her it was a god damn accident but then she went on and on about fuck knows what - asking stupid questions! Do I care about her? Do I spend enough time with her? So I just lost it and told her to shut up.”
Billie raised his eyebrows as Tre shook his head, closing his eyes.
“Ok maybe I shouldn’t have said it but you know what I’m like! Yeah maybe I do forget things and I don’t have to spend all my fucking time with her to show her I care!” He exhaled loudly. “Jesus Christ!”
“That why she ran out?”
“No, she ran out when I told her the relationship wasn’t anything serious.”
“What?! You told a chick your dating that the relationship wasn’t serious?! Are you fucking-?””
“Alright, alright! So maybe it wasn’t such a good thing to say.”
Billie pretended to shoot himself in the head.
“Alright then, it was fucking terrible. It just came out, god damn it! I didn’t mean it.”
Mike came in from the garden, still on the phone.
“….Alright, honey. Yeah that’s cool. See ya later.” He put down the phone.
“Anyone gonna tell me what the fuck that was all about?”
Mike’s face was blank during the whole of the story telling. Billie could tell what was going through his mind; the girl was trouble.
“Maybe you and her should cool it.” Mike suggested, helping himself to pizza.
Tre went to join him. Good ol’ Tre, Billie thought. The argument hadn’t made him lose his appetite then.
“Maybe I should go see how she is,” Billie said cautiously, still standing by the door.
The pizza in Mike’s hand stopped half way up to his face, which read “are you fucking crazy?” while Tre shrugged, his back to Billie as he helped himself to more pizza.
Billie looked at Mike who shook his head and mouthed, “Don’t fuck this up even more, Armstrong.” Before hurrying to his car.
He reached her house fifteen minutes later. No one answered but he knew she was home – the car was parked in her drive.
He tried three times before lifting up the letterbox. “I know you’re there Harry. Let me in.”
No reply.
“This is fucking ridiculous. I’ll sit out here all night if I have to.” And just to prove the point he sat on the doorstep, his back against the door. “Let me in Harry, please. It’s cold y’know, and people are looking at me like I’m some kind of idiot.”
He jumped up as unexpectedly the door opened.
“You are an idiot.,” she said smiling weakly. Only the red eyes, and smudged mascara on her beautiful face gave away her feelings.
He smiled. “That’s what they all tell me.”
He followed her in to the living room where she sat on the sofa, legs pulled up tight to her chest as she wrapped her arms around them.
She studied him, chin on her knees, as he sat opposite her on an armrest, pretending to be interested in the modern artwork above her head, knowing she was looking at him intently.
“Why are you here Billie?” She asked finally.
“I’m….not sure.” He said eventually after tearing his eyes away from the wall to look in to her captivating brown eyes. She didn’t blink once.
“I think I do.” She whispered softly. “And so do you.”
He rubbed the back of his neck and looked at the floor. “Then, can you tell me?”
“Tell you what?” He looked up to see her staring at the floor, lost in thought.
“You know what.”
She sighed. “Do we have to talk in fucking riddles? Just say it.”
He bit his lip, choosing his words carefully. Saying it would make it real, and not just some thought in his head. Was that such a good thing? Even if she didn’t feel the same way? Why am I so fucking confused, he thought.
“That kiss.” He paused, waiting to see her reaction. “What did it mean to you?”
She looked away from him. So it did mean something? Or not?
“Fuck, Billie. You’re a friend. You have a wife. You’re a fucking father for God’s sake.”
“That’s not answering the question.”
“Whatever I said, whatever I told you, would it make any difference anyway?”
He hesitated.
“There’s your answer, then.”
He sighed frustratedly. “Why won’t you tell me?”
She shook her head at him. “What’s the point? You’re married and I’m supposedly dating your best friend. What do you want me to say? I love you?”
His got up and walked to the door, ready to leave.
He looked up at the ceiling as he said, “That’s exactly what I want you to say.”