Cancerous Love

It started out when Zacky would feel weak, and his skin became paler. He doesn't understand this. He shrugged it off and didn't think about it. It was probably just some sickness. Oh, how wrong he was. He wished he didn't ignore it, he wished he would go to treatment earlier. It was all too late.
His husband, Brian, didn't even know. Zacky didn't want to tell him. Brian was too happy and cheery for him to just drop the bomb and tell him about it. Brian would ask why he was so pale and skinny, he would always say, "It's nothing."
The day where the doctor told him was the worst day of his life. Brian wasn't in town and Zacky cried for hours and hours straight. He didn't answer Brian's calls, he didn't eat, he didn't do anything.
He still remembers how his heart beat as the doctor came in with the results from the test. He still remembers that sinking feeling as those first two words came out of the doctor's mouth, "I'm sorry."
He still remembers how the room was full of tension and anticipation as to why the doctor would say he was sorry. But the most prominent memory was when the doctor told him those three heart wrenching, pitiful words.

"You have cancer."

It seemed like the whole world stopped then and there. Zacky wanted the ground to just open up and swallow him down to the pits of hell. It was the moment where he could literally feel his heart stop beating. It was the worst moment of his life.
Now he sits on the couch, waiting for Brian to come home from the grocery store, wanting to tell him that he only has a few weeks left to live. The door opened and his cheery whistling came from the front.

"Honey, I'm home!" Brian joked, expecting laughs from Zacky. But no, it was silent. Silent and tense. He furrowed his brows together and walked to the living room, seeing Zacky with the most heartbreaking expression on his face.

"Brian, I need to tell you something." Zacky whispers.

"What's wrong?" Brian asked, putting down the groceries. Zacky looked up at him with teary eyes.

"Brian, I remember the first time we met. You were a senior and I was a sophomore. I always saw you staring at me from a distance, and my heart would always beat ten times faster because you were the most handsome human being I've ever seen. You finally came to me and asked me out. I remember being so nervous, getting ready for our date. I really liked you, and I guess, I could say the same thing about you. The. You asked me to marry you, and it was the best moment of my entire life. I loved you so much, and I still do. But after keeping this a secret since we were still dating, I guess you deserve to know now that we're two years married. I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before, but it was too late. Nothing could change this anymore." Zacky said.

"What is it?" Brian asked, feeling slightly scared.

"Brian," Zacky started, letting tears fall. "I have cancer, and I only have weeks." Zacky choked out.

Brian felt his whole world fall apart as he fell to the ground, on his knees. Everything was perfect but now this happens. Zacky walked towards Brian and kneeled in front of him.

"I'm so sorry, Brian." Zacky breathed out, kissing Brian.

"Why didn't you tell me from the start?" Brian asked, tears falling freely.

"If I told you, we wouldn't have been as happy as we were. We acted like there was nothing wrong." Zacky explained.

"No, I'm not giving you up. We can still do this. You will be okay, I promise. Let's just go to the hospital and then you'll be okay, okay?" Brian said shakily.

"No, Brian. It's too late." Brian nodded and tried to be strong. He couldn't let Zacky down. He didn't know what to feel anymore. Everything was a mess. "Let's go upstairs, okay?" Zacky suggested and helped Brian up.

They laid together, arm in arm, not wanting to let go of each other. Zacky felt tired so he closed his eyes and drifted away to sleep. Brian looked down and slowly let go of Zacky, before he walked down.
That was when he finally broke down. He curled up against the table and hugged the picture frame of him and Zacky. It was a year ago, when they were on a trip to Bali.
What was he going to do without Zacky? He can't live without him. Brian stayed up all night, just crying while watching Zacky sleep. Watching him breathe, every breath closer to the end.

~*~*~

Zacky was already extremely sick. He couldn't move, just laid in bed while Brian fed him and helped him. It was heartbreaking to see the love of your life practically dying in front of your eyes. Today was the day where Zacky would go. Where Brian would be left alone in this world.

"Brian." Zacky choked out.

"Yes, love?" Brian tried to smile.

"Why do you still love me? I'm bald, skinny, pale, ugly. Why didn't you just leave me and spare the pain?" He asked, wheezing.

"I could never do that to you, beautiful. You are beautiful, even now, you're still the most beautiful person I've ever met." Brian smiled sadly.

"Brian, I think it's time. Please don't be sad now, I really believe you were the greatest thing that ever happened to me." Zacky wheezed. (A/N Mayday Parade lyrics!)

"I know, and I want you to know, that you will always be in my heart and that I will always love you, and you're the most beautiful person I've ever laid eyes on." Brian pecked his forehead, holding his head.

"Brian, my dying wish, is, I want you to kiss me as I die. I love you so much." Zacky coughed, whimpering in pain. Zacky's hold on Brian's hand weakening. Brian nodded and leaned down, and kissed him passionately. He made sure Zacky could feel all the love through that kiss. After a couple of seconds, Zacky stopped kissing back, and stopped breathing. Brian's tear fell on Zacky's cheek, and pulled away.

"I love you, my love. I will never forget you." Brian whispered, missing him one lat time before he told the news to everyone.

~*~*~

Days after the funeral, Brian was a complete wreck. His friends knew it, they noticed. Brian was depressed, and he turned to alcohol to wash away his feelings.
One particular day, he couldn't take it anymore. He staggered to his room, an almost empty bottle of vodka in his hands, and took a gun out of the drawer.

"We'll love again, we'll laugh again, we'll cry again, and we'll dance again. And it's better off this way, so much better off this way." He slurred to himself, pointing the gun to his head. (MCR lyrics!)

He put the bottle down, and laid on the bed, closing his eyes as he cocked the gun. He pulled the trigger and everything went black.

~*~*~

Brian woke up to a blinding light, and it seems like he was at a field or some sort . He saw a figure walking towards him and stop right before him. The figure stretched out his hand and helped Brian up. Brian rubbed his eyes to get used to the light before he looked at the figure and noticed that it was his angel.

"Welcome to heaven, my love." He green-eyed beauty smiled at him.