Without You There is No Me

Without you there is no me - A Fuenciado one shot

Vic’s POV
Today is Saturday and Jaime and I are going to go see a movie together. As friends of course. He still doesn't know I’m completely, head over heels in love with him. But I would never pass up the chance to be around him. Being around Jaime just fills me with so much joy. I’m thinking that today I’m going to tell him how I feel. I don’t know, but today I’m feeling really courageous.

Jaime and I walk onto the bus that we have been impatiently waiting for, for the last 30 minutes. Well I didn't really mind the wait; again I’m spending time with Jaime so I’m okay with it. I lead Jaime near the back of the bus so we could have a little more privacy and I could maybe tell him that I’m in love with him. We sat down and my attention went out the window. I’m just staring out the window thinking of ways to tell him. As I start to think about Jaime my mind started to wander. He’s so gorgeous. I love everything about him. His dreamy brown eyes, his silly dark hair with a streak of blonde in the front, his beautiful smile that lights up my whole day when I see it and his lips, oh gosh his lips. Every time I see those gorgeous lips form into that smile that I love so dearly I just want to grab his face and crash mine into them. He’s just so perfect at everything he does, no wonder why I’m s-

“Vic? Vic?!” I heard an annoyed Jaime yell at me. “Are you even listening to a word I've been saying?” he looked at me smiling trying to hide his annoyance.

Opps, how long have I been looking out the window thinking about Jaime? How long have I been ignoring him?

“Uh, yeah sorry.” I said trying to hide my smile. He just makes me so happy I can’t help but smile when I’m around him

“Hey are you okay man? You seem a little down today, or like you’re thinking about something. What’s bothering you?” Jaime asked in what almost seemed like in a concerned tone.

Other than the fact I’m in love with my best friend and I can’t tell him because he’s straight and wow you’re so beautiful Jaime. I just really want to make you mine.

“VIC!” Jaime yelled. “What is going on with you today? Every time I ask you something I just get a blank stare and no answer.”

“Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind right now.”

“What’s going on? Vic, I’m your best friend you know you can tell me anything that’s bothering you” He said smiling at me while putting his arm around me in hopes of cheering me up.

I blushed at his touch but quickly went back to thinking about how I’m going to tell him so Jaime wouldn't notice. And I didn't need to be cheered up. I needed to think of a way to tell him I’m in love with him.

“It’s really nothing important Hime; please just don’t worry about me” I said with a reassuring smile that he didn't seem to buy.

“Vic I know when something is bothering you and I know it’s not nothing. Come on just tell me”
“Okay, well-” I started taking a pause trying to find my words. I’m going to do this. I’m going to tell Jaime that he is the love of my life and that I want to be with him.

“Yes?” He inched on, looking eager to know what I have to say.

“Do you promise that no matter what I tell you right now our friendship will still be the same?” I asked trying to stall. I’m really not sure I want to do this. But I will.

“Vic of course, you’re my best friend. Nothing can ever tear our friendship apart. Now tell me!” he said getting a little anxious.

“Alright. Jaime you’re my best friend in the entire world and every day that I’m with you just makes me so happy, you make me so happy Jaime. And well I've wanted to tell you this for a while but I really didn't know how to word it but, uh, I’m in love with you Jaime Preciado and I want nothing more than to call you mine.” Once I said those last few words I watched Jaime’s beautiful smile that I loved so much sink into a look of confusion.

“Jaime please say something so I know whether to hate myself or not.” I said trying not to let these tears I've been holding back fall. But I got nothing. The bus came to a stop and I watched Jaime stand up.

“I’m sorry Vic but I just can’t. I’m sorry.” And with that he got off the bus and started to walk away from the bus leaving me with tears falling from my face.
I just sat there. I finally built up enough courage to tell him how I felt and I ruined everything. I lost my best friend because I had to be in love with him. I hate myself so much right now.

-

After the bus came to another stop I stood up and walked off. I walked until I finally reached my house. I was thankful to see that nobody was home. I could just be alone with that cold piece of metal I consider to be my only friend. And now, it really is my only friend. I got to my door and unlocked it, slamming the door as I ran up to my bedroom where I slammed my bedroom door as well. I stood there looking around my room until I slowly slid down the door into a crouch as I felt tears streaming down my face. I've really done it. I've really lost the only person that matters to me in life. Today has been the worst day of my life. And considering I’m a walking disaster today really tops the charts for ‘worst day ever’. Today was the day I told my best friend in the whole world that I’m in love with him. I really don’t know why I did because I knew he wouldn't like me anyway, but I did. I told him that he is all I think about every day, I told him that he’s my everything and that when I’m not with him my life feels so completely empty, like a part of me is missing. Well, I didn't tell him all of that… I’m way too insecure to hear what he has to say if I ever did, and now that I think about it I’m so glad I didn't. I just told him that I was in love with him, and that I have been ever since I met him. And that’s what it took for me to lose my best friend. I feel almost insulted with the way he didn't really even say anything to me either. He just got up and left me sitting on the bus alone without an answer.

I stood up after crying and feeling sorry for myself for what seemed like forever and I opened my bedroom door and walked to my bathroom.

I opened the bathroom door and stood in front of the mirror. I looked at myself, disgusted. Disgusted with everything about myself. I bent down and opened the cupboard underneath the sink. I took out a small box where I keep my blades. I looked back up into the mirror where I saw a pathetic failure that can’t seem to do anything right. I lifted up the blade and looked at it. I then sighed and dragged it across my arm. With every cut I continued to repeat “you deserve that, and this, and this one. You’re just a huge disgusting fuck up that doesn't deserve to live. You deserve to die. Nobody cares about you, why don’t you just end it all right now?” And with that I slid the blade across my arm one last time, watching the blood start to pool around where I dragged the blade.

I put the blade back into its box and put the box back into the cupboard and walked back to my bedroom. I stopped at my door as I saw a puffy eyed Jaime sitting on my bed. He stood up while wiping a tear from his cheek.

“Jaime, when did you get here?” I asked confused hoping he didn't see what I was doing in the bathroom. But I could tell by his face that he knew what I was doing.

I stood there waiting for a response that I didn't get. While we both stood there in silence I felt something dripping down my arm. I looked down remembering what I just did to myself. I quickly looked up when I realized Jaime saw where I was looking. When he noticed the blood he ran out of my room. I was confused as to where he was going but I quickly realized when he came back in holding a cloth and band aids. He grabbed my hand and sat me on my bed as I sat there he slowly wiped away the blood from my arm. We sat there in silence as he finished washing away the blood when he finally broke the silence.

“Vic, why did you do this to yourself?”

I really had no answer. I've been doing this for so long that I really don’t know why I do it anymore. I guess it makes me feel less alone.

“I don’t know.” I answered while a tear managed its way out of my eye and down my cheek.

Jaime quickly whipped my tear as he put the band aids on my fresh cuts.

“Why did you leave me there?” I asked, surprised that I actually built up enough courage to say it.

“Vic plea-“

“No Jaime!” I cut him off “I want to know why you left me sitting there on the bus after I told you that I was in love with you. Why did you leave?!” I realized that I was yelling and I noticed that there were tears running down my beautiful Jaime’s face. I kind of felt bad but I really didn't care at this moment.

“Vic I’m really sorry. I didn't know why I did. I was just so shocked by what you said. I never thought I would ever hear you say those words. Vic I've been in love with you for as long as I can remember. Everyone thinks I’m straight so I knew I could never tell you. And I always thought you didn't like me in that way. I’m sorry I left you there without an answer but I was just so surprised that I didn't know what to do. I knew I had to tell you so that’s why I came back here. I’m just so sorry Vic please, don’t hate me” Jaime pleaded as sobs started to escape him.

“Jaime, are you crazy? I could never hate you. Even if my life depended on it I could never hate you. You’re the love of my life. Everything you do makes me unbelievably hap-“

“Vic-“Jaime said cutting me off. I wasn't going to let him though. He needed to hear this.

“No, for fuck sake Jaime let me finish, you need to hear this!” I said cutting him off. “You are everything I have ever wanted in life. I swear to god you’re the only thing that’s keeping me alive. I wish I would have told you this sooner but I do believe you are the love of my life and I really just want to spend the rest of my life with you.” I looked at Jaime as he wiped more tears away and a smile spread across his face.

“y-you really mean t-that Vic?” He managed to get out between sniffles.

“Every last word, I love you with all my heart Jaime Preciado.”

“I love you too Vic Fuentes.”

With those six words I've waited for this boy to say my whole life I smiled and crashed my lips into his. He grabbed my head as his fingers got tangled in my hair. He danced his tongue along my lower lip asking for permission to enter and I quickly gave it to him. As we broke away we smiled at each other as he brushed my hair that was lying in front of my face behind my ear.

We both smiled at each other as Jaime stood up and pushed me onto my bed. He then got on top of me as our lips met again. He helped me take my shirt off while our lips never left each other’s. Once my shirt was off, he through it to the other side of the room and kissed my neck as silent moans started to escape my lips. He kissed his way down my chest until he got to my pants. He quickly undid them and pulled them off me and looked up at me almost asking for permission to take off my boxers, I quickly gave it to him by a quick nod of my head. He took my boxers off me throwing them off the bed as he started to palm me until I was hard. After I was hard he took all of me in his mouth without hesitation. A moan escaped my lips which was louder than intended. Once I came Jaime swallowed it all looking up at me. I then flipped him around so he was lying underneath me as I tore his shirt off of him and helped him as he struggled to get out of his jeans. Once his jeans and boxers were off I spat into my hand putting enough on my length and Jaime’s entrance. After that I pushed myself into him as an uneasy whimper came out of his beautiful lips. I quickly pulled out worried that I hurt him.

“Are you okay baby?” I asked hesitant to putting myself back into him.

“Yeah I’m fine, go ahead.” Jaime said while grabbing the sheets and biting his lip ready for me to enter.

I entered him again pushing myself into him as he let out a moan of approval. I pushed into him several more times until I hit his prostate and I felt his nails dig into my back and a fairly loud moan escape his lips. He pulled me closer to him to the point there was no space between us. I straddled his hips as he dug his nails into my back and I heard him moan my name which encouraged me to go harder until he came all over my chest. Once I finished inside of him, I collapsed on the bed beside him. He rolled over onto his side, as did I and pulled the covers up on top of us. He brushed my hair away from my face and kissed my lips. Before I could kiss back he pulled away with a huge smile on his face.

“What?” I asked throwing a pillow at his face and giggling.

“Ouch, that wasn't very nice” he pouted.

“Aw I’m sorry baby, want me to kiss it better?” I asked imitating his pout and laughing at him.

“That would be very much appreciated” he laughed back. As I leaned in to kiss his whole face where the pillow hit him.

“I’m so happy you’re finally mine, Hime” I said putting my fingers through his now messy hair.

“I am too, I really didn't think you felt the same way about me but after what we just did, damn was I wrong.”

“I really do love you though, you mean absolutely everything to me Jaime. You’re all I ever think about every day, you’re my everything and when I’m not with you my life feels so completely empty, like a part of me is missing.” I finally said it. I finally said what I was so insecure about saying for so long.
“I really do love you too Vic. I love you so very much and I don’t know what I would do without you. Without you, there is no me.” After he said that he kissed my lips once more and then closed his eyes.

Just as I was about to close my eyes I heard my brother Mike yell from his bedroom which happened to be right next to mine “You two about done in there? I understand y’all love each other and all but I would much rather not spend my Saturday night hearing my brother and his, uhm, boyfriend have sex thank you very much” Jaime’s eyes shot open as he heard Mike say that and we both laughed.

I grabbed Jaime into my arms and snuggled into him “I love you so much Jaime Alberto Preciado”

“I love you too Victor Vincent Fuentes. Never leave me, Okay?” He said snuggling into my chest more so there was no space left between us.

“I promise I will never leave you as long as I’m walking this earth. I love you more than anything else Jaime. You’re my everything.” I said kissing his head.

I watched Jaime smile and close his eyes. I then closed my eyes able to sleep with the boy I love more than anything in the world in my arms. I've never been so happy in my life. And I can finally call Jaime Preciado mine.
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Alright so last night my mom shut the internet off and i didn't know what to do with my life so i decided i would write a fan fiction. this is the first fic I've ever written so idk how good it is but leave comments if you've read it telling me if you liked it or not. also i'll take requests on other fan fics i should write. and who knows, maybe i'll turn this into a full blown fic instead of just a one shot.