Behind My Mask

------- 3 years later ------

I walked down the same path I did nearly every month, feeling the cold wind scratch my face and try to get underneath my clothes. The leaves underneath my feet crunched tenderly, and the sun itself has been blocked by a shield of clouds, threatening to cry.

I stopped in front of the two grave stones, putting down the flowers I was carrying. I had always dreaded that it would end up this way; that I would be visiting his grave, but I never expected it to be so soon. Both of them were so young, so full of life.

I remember the day of the funeral, just as if it was yesterday:
No one had suspected anything; both of them had looked so happy, so content with life. No one had ever wanted them to disappear, they had made everyone smile with their happiness. Many people mourned, many people were deeply hurt. Many people cried.

It was held at the same time; its what they would have wanted, with their coffins laying side to side of each other.

I noticed that Kellin's family was there too; it was a rare sight, to actually see them. While he was still alive, I think I only saw them once. But here they were, crying their eyes out. You could see how deeply they cared, you could see the regret in their faces. How much they wished for him to be alive.

Everyone payed their regards, quietly muttering some things as they stood by their coffins, some would let everyone know what they thought, such as me.

"We deeply cared for both of these people; they were so happy together, instantly lifting the mood around them. I would see how much care they held for each other, and as much as it pains me to say it, I don't think they would have been happy alive, if they didn't have their significant other. They were two halves that couldn't live without each other, they were one another's life support's.
They will be greatly missed, and always remembered."

I had talked for longer than 10 minutes, pouring everything I felt about them, holding back the tears that were biting at my eyes, trying to break their way through.

Before I mixed back in with the crowd, I walked over to my brothers grave, slightly leaning down.
"I hope, that where you are, you are at peace, and you are happy"

-----

Before Vic had killed himself, he had left a note behind; Burn the letter, and destroy the CD, it's what he would have wanted. Burn this letter too, after you have looked underneath

I had done what it had instructed me, I first turned over the piece of paper, instantly recognizing that it was a suicide note.

The loss of Kellin has made me incapable of living on; knowing that I could no longer see his smiling face, and feel his soft skin, it was killing me inside. I was slowly dying. I was incapable of doing anything but cry dry tears. To anyone who is reading this, I am sorry, please forgive me

His writing was scratchy, it was hard to make out the words, but re-reading it many times had let me understand fully, what he had written down.
I was crying, but I completed the tasks given; burning both of the letters and snapping the CD in half.

His room was left untouched for months; no one went in it, they were too scared to. Behind those doors was a wave, threatening to drown you if you dare enter.

Our lives were quiet. There was a cloud looming above our heads, refusing to leave. It was like that for a while, no one really wanted to move on; the two of them were such a big part of our lives, that
it was almost impossible to let go.

We would never be capable of forgetting them.