The Dream and the Dreamer

Jake had fallen to the floor some time ago, his body drained of the will to give a damn and he had crumpled into a sort of twisted heap. His eyes burned from tears, but when he closed them, the irritant was even worse. He was deepened in a think, wooly loss, terrible self-pity that kept him in a thin veil of coldness from head to toe. He had no energy to move or cry, his will and strength dissipated long ago, the only thing that kept him running it seemed was immense anger.
Anger devoured his excruciating self-pity; anger filled him, rattling his bones, forcing him out of the pretzels that his legs became. There was a sudden urgency that propelled him to move, to grab his coat and keys and go.
How could he? After all this time, things finally fit together and those years of aggravation were falling to wasted shambles because he couldn't keep it together. After all the toying, how could he just let Amir go? He thought of all the years of torment that man went through, the bruises painted over his features like a shield of the person he could have been if he wasn't so fucked up. The years of hesitant stepping, of protection just because he desired the companionship, it wasn't for nothing. If it wasn't meant to be, Amir would have been gone ages ago. By God, he loved that boy and he wasn't giving up that easily.
It was their own isolated bubble, the nonsense was there's to decipher and frankly Jake didn't care anymore. Amir was the constant. Amir was normalcy. Amir was ordinary and extraordinary all in one.
Jake had been so lost in thought that he didn't notice he took the stairs until a booming; eccentric voice shook him from his inner monologue.
All that cliché nonsense about fate suddenly felt real, his body felt light and he couldn't help but smile as he made his way down the stairs. His steps echoed, but the voice was louder. Jake tingled with nerves and excitement, "Amir,” he called out gently, getting the attention of the other man who was on the phone, "Mickey, look outside! Do you see me? Good, you shouldn't because I'm not there and I have to go," he rushed. He stuffed the phone in his pocket and turned slightly to acknowledge Jake. The latter came down the rest of the way and sat down on the cold metal steps. His knee tapped against Amir’s, a rush of that butterfly feeling erupted in his stomach. A light silence fell upon them, but it was enjoyable. Jake sighed, "I'm sorry about all of that," he mumbled, "why are you still here?" The question hung there for a moment until Amir cleared his throat, "I was waiting," he muttered, though clear. Jake nodded slowly, Amir cleared his throat again, "I've done a lot of waiting" he whimpered, voice cracking. Jake couldn't help but smile; he covered it with his hand. "I never wanted you to hate me, I just wanted to be best gullies," his voice was so soft, yet so sharp, it pierced Jakes chest like a dagger, he glanced over to see such a different demeanor he has only seen a few times, an honest, fragile state that merely triggered the immense love and sense of protection Jake had. He wished nothing more than to scoop that man into a hug and kiss the words he'd like to say all over him. But Jake stayed absolutely still. Amir groaned, inpatient and uncomfortable, he leaned back in frustration, his face towards the ceiling, Jake watched small tears drip down his amusingly contorted face.
"I've just been hoping for so long, you asshole!" Jake chuckled, "thank you, “he muttered. Amir yelled an immensely frustrated "for what” but Jake could only manage to shrug, still grinning. Again, silence fell between them. Jake enjoyed it for a moment, savoring that penultimate feeling like the first dip of a roller coaster. He licked his lip, glancing down at his trembling fingers as his heart began to race and his lungs started to hurt,
"can I kiss you?" He asked, voice quaking, the words made his mouth dry. Eternity seemed to pass, Jake heard the rustling of Amir turning, his denim scratching against the stairs and he glanced over.
His eyes were softened, his brow relaxed. Jake could see his reflection in his glasses, which he pushed up his nose instinctively. His hands were shaking as well, his lip quivered. Finally, he gave one curt nod. Hesitantly Jake moved forward, closing the gap between them until finally he could feel the heat of Amir’s shallow breath. His hands continued to tremble, his legs shook as he pressed his lips against Amir’s. They both inhaled sharply as they pushed into the kiss. Amir’s lips were soft and sweet. Jake flicked his tongue over his bottom lip to taste him and he tasted subtly of Cola. He brought a hand up, cupping his face gently. His skin was just as soft, his beard just a tad course under the pads of his fingers. He parted slightly, Amir following him and he grinned wildly before gently kissing his lips again, then the corner of his mouth, then gently lifting his glasses, kissing his tear ducts, then lastly his forehead.
Jake leaned away. "What now?" He asked quietly.
"Mcnuggets?"