I Hope You Like the Stars I Stole for You

I regretted the words as soon as they’d left my mouth, why had I just broken up with Vic ? I loved him more than anything else in the world, but now I couldn’t take them back. If he didn’t want me, then I would try to move on, it would better for him. If I knew he was happy then maybe I could accept things.

I was openly sobbing now, and I stumbled back into the waiting room, unsure of whether to stay or go. Alex emerged from his room at about the same time as me, and he saw me crying immediately. “God, Pruitt, I’m sorry, did I mess everything up ?” I was shaking and crying so badly that I couldn’t even form words, but I shook my head no. It hadn’t been his fault, it was my fault for not being good enough for Vic. Vic was right, all I’d done was make his life harder. Alex filled his paper work out, then accompanied me outside the hospital. He crushed me to his chest, “Shh, it’s gonna be okay.” “No it’s not ! Nothing’s ever gonna be okay !” I yelled, pulling away from him. “He doesn’t want me anymore, but I still want him, more than anything ! I fucking love him, I love him okay ?!” I fell to my knees, burying my face in my palms. Alex looked shocked, “What happened ? Pruitt, you’re scaring me.”

Alex’s strong arms pulled me up from the ground, and he lead me away from the hospital. I never stopped crying long enough to say anything else, or even see where we were going. I just kept crying into his side as he pulled me along. Some minutes later, we were two towns over in a nature center, sitting at the top of a grassy hill. The sun was setting, and my tears were still falling. I ended up explaining my last conversation with Vic to Alex, and he looked truly sorry. “It’s all my fault…you didn’t have to stick up for me, I’m the one who made the mistake.” My voice thick, I told him the truth “I’m glad I did, because now I know that he’s been wanting to get rid of me, that he was just trying to figure out how. I’m so worthless…..” I collapsed onto my back, staring at the sky. I felt so utterly hopeless, that I almost couldn’t feel anything anymore. “Don’t say that.” Alex replied, turning to face me. I closed my eyes, trying to forget that I existed.

“Let’s run away. You and me, right now. Well and Jack, I can’t leave without him. I’ll call him right now and the three of us will disappear and never come back.”

“I can’t, Alex. I want to, but I can’t. I can’t do anything anymore, I can’t function without him. I can’t sleep, eat, or go to school. I’m not being an overdramatic teenager, I’m serious. He’s my whole world. What am I going to do ?” My voice broke on the question, and I shut my eyes again.
“Spend the night with Jack and I then ?” he asked me hopefully. I nodded wearily, “I guess I have to call my mom then.” I dialed her number, and she answered on the first ring. “Hi sweetie.” “Hey Mom, can I spend the night with my friends tonight ?” “Not Vic, I hope…” “No, Alex and Jack.” “Sure, that’s fine. You’re father and I will be gone anyway. Be home by noon tomorrow, and be careful. I love you.” “Love you too mom. Bye.”

Faking a normal tone of voice had taken a lot out of me, and I didn’t talk for the entire way to Alex’s house. We had been gone almost all day, it was nearing six o’clock now. Jack was already there, chilling with Alex’s parents, they were just that close. It turned out that his parents would be leaving too, so we would have the house to ourselves. I faked more smiles and forced more laughter until they left. It seemed everyone’s parents had more of a social life than me these days. Jack started asking what’s wrong, and I looked to Alex. “You can tell him, but I don’t want anyone else knowing and I don’t want to talk about it.” They started making food for us, and I sat in the living room listening to their discussion about the day’s events. Afternoon sunlight streamed in through the tall windows, lighting up the clean, open house. I sat alone on the couch, the only sound coming from my two friends in the kitchen. I had lost a baby and the love of my life in one day, and honestly, Jack and Alex were probably the only two in the world who cared about me at all.

I started to cry again, hearing them say Vic’s name over and over again. When they walked into the room, they didn’t notice my tears at first. They set the abundance of snacks on the tables on either end of the couch, and then they both got a good look at me. Jack looked alarmed, and Alex looked at me sadly. The sat down on either side of me, and Jack tried to cheer me up. Suddenly they both began tickling me, and my tears dried up. I didn’t feel better, and I certainly didn’t feel happy, but I felt pleasantly numb. We ate and watched dumb comedies, and when I started to feel tired, I put my head in Jack’s lap and my feet in Alex’s. I fell asleep around eleven to the droning of the tv.

I woke up surrounded my darkness, still laying on the guys. A pounding at the door had woken me up, and I tiptoed to answer it; maybe it was Alex’s parents. But when I opened up the heavy wood door, instead I was faced with Vic.

He had a gun.

I woke up in a cold sweat, bolting upright. This woke Alex and Jack as well, and we all looked at each other. This time, there really was a pounding on the door, and that was what had woken me up. Jack and I looked to Alex, after all, it was his house. I was afraid my dream had been a premonition, so I followed close behind, clutching his arm. Jack did the same behind me. We crept to the door in the pitch dark. Alex swung it open to reveal three guys- Mike, Tony, and Jaime. “Pruitt ?” Mike seemed shocked to find me here. “We went to your house and no one answered so we figured….”Jaime started, but Mike cut him off. “Listen, guys. Vic is missing.”