"Blessed" with a Curse

“Austin…Austin…?”
I didn’t want to get up…I still felt horrible…

“Come on, Aus…”

That voice…!

I opened my eyes and saw Kellin sitting on the bed, smiling softly at me.
I sat up quickly, tears instantly rolling down my face.

He moved closer to me, his smile dropping.

“You had that nightmare again, didn’t you?”
I nodded. He reached toward me and wiped my tears away.
My eyes widened in shock.

I felt his skin against mine.
It was so cold, but I felt it…

“H-How did you…?” “I learned a few things while I was away.”

I nodded again and let a few more tears fall.

“I missed you so much, Kellin…I thought you were mad at me this whole time.”

“I wasn’t mad, Aus. I just had to go away for a bit.”
I hugged my knees to my chest.

“Are you gonna go away again?”
“Yes…but not as long as I did last time. I’ll still visit every once in a while.”

I was silent for a moment. Then a foolish idea popped into my head…

“Kellin…?” “Hm?”

“C-can…can you…kiss me…? Just one last time…?”
“Austin I—” “Just this once…please…”

He leant in slowly and pressed his lips against mine.
They were still soft as usual, but…they were so cold…

He’s just so cold…

“Austin~! Wake up~! I brought break…fast…”

Kellin and I both turned and saw Alan standing in the doorway, a hurt look on his face.

Fuck…

“Alan I—”
He walked off before I could say anything else.

“I’ll go talk to him…”
Kellin stood up from the bed and disappeared.

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair.

I heard sniffling nearby, meaning that Alan was in the living room. I got up and walked towards the stairwell, sitting down on the first step so they couldn’t see me.

Alan was leaning against the wall while Kellin stood in front of him.

“Alan—”
“No…don’t say anything…what was I thinking…? How could he have loved me…? His heart had always belonged to you, even after death…there’s no room for me in there…I’m just a sad charity case…”

“Alan, stop—”
“No…it’s the truth and you know it! How could he ever love me? It’s my fault he’s the way he is now…it’s my fault that everything is messed up…! It’s my fault that you’re dead!”

“What?!”
Both Kellin and Alan looked up at me.
Kellin had a sad look on his face while Alan stared at me in absolute fear.

I ran downstairs and stood next to Kellin in front of Alan, grabbing him by the collar of his sweater.

“Austin…! Calm down…!” Kellin was staring at me in fear as well.
I ignored him, keeping my focus on Alan.

“Tell me! What the hell do you mean that this is your fault?!” He continued to stare at me, trembling in fear.
I balled up one of my fists in anger.

“Answer me, Alan!” “Austin! Stop!”
Alan still didn’t say anything.

“Alan! I swear to God, if you don’t say anything in the next three seconds…!”

There wasn’t any warning…he just collapsed to the ground…

“Alan…? Alan?!”
I knelt down next to him and shook his shoulder. No movement.

“Alan?! Come on! Wake up! Please, wake up!”
I held his limp body in my arms and shook him again.

He still didn’t respond.

I looked at Kellin, hoping that he could help me somehow.
He only shook his head, his face returning to that sad expression.

“I told you to stop, Austin…he can’t handle being yelled at…I told you to stop…”