Status: Progress Completed :)
UpSide Down Alice
Ghosts that Haunt
The winds calmed in Wonderland. The colors bloomed where Alice lay. I knew she was present in Wonderland. I could feel her heartbeat course through the forest floor. She would search for me past purple colored trees and red soil paths. She was determined to find me. The one friend who understood what could not be understood. I was under warm sun rays, in a small clearing, curled up on autumn leaves when heard her feet crunched in my direction. I made no effort to move towards her. Instead I arched my back and made room for her to join me.
"Ahh Alice." I purred as the breeze brushed against my fur. “You are back. How was your trip?"
Her eyes were red from crying. She had nail marks on her palms from digging them into her skin. She wasn't amused. Her body language made that clear enough. Her eyes were puffy, the green in them still stormy from the passing turbulence.
"I hate that." She hissed between clenched teeth. "Why I am still reliving the things that I desire to forget?!?"
"It is because you still wear the skin of a fleshy. Don't worry." I spring up on two legs. "Even I still have my moments." Then drop back down on my four paws.
She throws her head back; she is going to recount the pain. She lies herself down in a spot next to me. Not very close but just enough for me to catch her hushed words. That's the only way to rid of it in here in Wonderland. Those awful memories that, are ever so haunting. You have to speak them, so they can become Wonderland's and no longer yours. This was the process of liberation.
"I woke up on a day like any other ordinary day. . ."
----------------------------------------------------
Mitchell rose out of bed, rubbing her eyes in exhaustion. It was hard to sleep past the arguing but last night she managed. Well at least managed to get two hours of sleep. She hoped breakfast would be made. She was hungry. Her tummy grumbled in agreement with that thought. Pulling herself out of bed, her bare feet hit the floor. The cool surface against her feet shook off whatever was left of sleep's spell. She shuffled to the bathroom and closed the door for privacy.
-------------------------------------------------
"How utterly ordinary Alice."
"Let me finish." She never broke eye contact with the tree tops.
________________
When she made her way into the kitchen Mitchell sensed tension. Her parents were posed at either end of the dining table. Her younger brother sat wide eyed and oblivious to much of his surroundings. She knew something was off. Something was missing she just couldn't put her finger on it.
"Good you’re up." Her father said curtly. The ice in his voice sent shivers up her spines.
The silence that followed seemed endless; though she was aware it has only been a moment before her mother spoke.
"Your father is leaving." The lack of compassion in her mother's voice left her breathless.
What does she mean by leaving? She thought to herself. Where could he be going? How long will he be gone?
Whatever hungry once lingered had vanished. She knew that it would not return with her father’s next actions. He glared coldly at her mother’s face as he slowly lifted himself from of the back of the chair. He pushed it against it so hard that the table trembled under the force. Then he began making his way out of their home.
When making his way to the porch, Mitchell began to follow. She was unaware that she was not the only one. All she knew was none of this could be real, and maybe if she followed he would start laughing. Then she would know for sure that this is a joke. A horrible, cruel joke, but a joke nonetheless. Her feet felt the change in the floor texture and her body shrived against the cold. She knew in her mind it wasn't cold here and yet she shrived anyway.
Her eyes fell on his car, his stuff was in there. Everything stuffed in the backseat in a haste to leave. When did he do that? she thought. Her mother huffed and began to yell. Don't make it worse, she wanted to shout. Shut up mom, she pleaded in the chambers of her mind. Her father returned her mother’s cold words, with cruel passionate blows. She never knew words could have such power, it had looked as if he had hit her instead of retorted. Her mother's words fell short of the returning words that her father had spoken. She could almost hear the impact of them against the walls of her eardrums.
"Listen, you are nothing! Don't you dare speak to me like that, okay?" His words ripped through the air toward her mother. Yet she still felt the cut of his words dig into her skin.
Please don't go, she thought. Don't leave. I love you. Her chest clenched as he climbed down the stairs towards the car. She became unaware of anything expect him. He wore an expression she would never forget. It looked like the smooth surface of plastic. So unfeeling, uncaring like someone wiped his face clean of emotions. Yet here she was feeling a pang in her chest.
She felt insecure, alone, stunned. What had gone wrong? 'What had gone right?’ a voice in her head chimed. She wanted a different outcome. She wished she could have redo of the morning, one where she would wake up to find her dad in the kitchen making breakfast. Her mother would be at the table with a strained smile drinking coffee. This wasn't supposed to happen. It was supposed to be just a day like any other.
She wanted to squeeze her eyes shut and open them again. So that it could reveal that she was still in bed and this was just a bad dream. Instead she watched the car pull away. Without even a backward glance her father was gone. Her mother grabbed her brother and pulled him in the house. She remained on the porch, hopeful that he would return.
_________________
"Now I am done." Alice said with a deep, sad breath.
I sat up uncomfortable with Alice's tale. It hits to close to home. So I pulled her up with every intention to leave this moment in the past.
"Let us dance Alice."
The leaves began to spin around us. The rainbow flashes across the sky. The winds laughing, Wonderland molding to my will. Alice didn't hesitate, as she once would have, instead she twirled in circles to the music of the wind’s laughter.
"Ahh Alice." I purred as the breeze brushed against my fur. “You are back. How was your trip?"
Her eyes were red from crying. She had nail marks on her palms from digging them into her skin. She wasn't amused. Her body language made that clear enough. Her eyes were puffy, the green in them still stormy from the passing turbulence.
"I hate that." She hissed between clenched teeth. "Why I am still reliving the things that I desire to forget?!?"
"It is because you still wear the skin of a fleshy. Don't worry." I spring up on two legs. "Even I still have my moments." Then drop back down on my four paws.
She throws her head back; she is going to recount the pain. She lies herself down in a spot next to me. Not very close but just enough for me to catch her hushed words. That's the only way to rid of it in here in Wonderland. Those awful memories that, are ever so haunting. You have to speak them, so they can become Wonderland's and no longer yours. This was the process of liberation.
"I woke up on a day like any other ordinary day. . ."
----------------------------------------------------
Mitchell rose out of bed, rubbing her eyes in exhaustion. It was hard to sleep past the arguing but last night she managed. Well at least managed to get two hours of sleep. She hoped breakfast would be made. She was hungry. Her tummy grumbled in agreement with that thought. Pulling herself out of bed, her bare feet hit the floor. The cool surface against her feet shook off whatever was left of sleep's spell. She shuffled to the bathroom and closed the door for privacy.
-------------------------------------------------
"How utterly ordinary Alice."
"Let me finish." She never broke eye contact with the tree tops.
________________
When she made her way into the kitchen Mitchell sensed tension. Her parents were posed at either end of the dining table. Her younger brother sat wide eyed and oblivious to much of his surroundings. She knew something was off. Something was missing she just couldn't put her finger on it.
"Good you’re up." Her father said curtly. The ice in his voice sent shivers up her spines.
The silence that followed seemed endless; though she was aware it has only been a moment before her mother spoke.
"Your father is leaving." The lack of compassion in her mother's voice left her breathless.
What does she mean by leaving? She thought to herself. Where could he be going? How long will he be gone?
Whatever hungry once lingered had vanished. She knew that it would not return with her father’s next actions. He glared coldly at her mother’s face as he slowly lifted himself from of the back of the chair. He pushed it against it so hard that the table trembled under the force. Then he began making his way out of their home.
When making his way to the porch, Mitchell began to follow. She was unaware that she was not the only one. All she knew was none of this could be real, and maybe if she followed he would start laughing. Then she would know for sure that this is a joke. A horrible, cruel joke, but a joke nonetheless. Her feet felt the change in the floor texture and her body shrived against the cold. She knew in her mind it wasn't cold here and yet she shrived anyway.
Her eyes fell on his car, his stuff was in there. Everything stuffed in the backseat in a haste to leave. When did he do that? she thought. Her mother huffed and began to yell. Don't make it worse, she wanted to shout. Shut up mom, she pleaded in the chambers of her mind. Her father returned her mother’s cold words, with cruel passionate blows. She never knew words could have such power, it had looked as if he had hit her instead of retorted. Her mother's words fell short of the returning words that her father had spoken. She could almost hear the impact of them against the walls of her eardrums.
"Listen, you are nothing! Don't you dare speak to me like that, okay?" His words ripped through the air toward her mother. Yet she still felt the cut of his words dig into her skin.
Please don't go, she thought. Don't leave. I love you. Her chest clenched as he climbed down the stairs towards the car. She became unaware of anything expect him. He wore an expression she would never forget. It looked like the smooth surface of plastic. So unfeeling, uncaring like someone wiped his face clean of emotions. Yet here she was feeling a pang in her chest.
She felt insecure, alone, stunned. What had gone wrong? 'What had gone right?’ a voice in her head chimed. She wanted a different outcome. She wished she could have redo of the morning, one where she would wake up to find her dad in the kitchen making breakfast. Her mother would be at the table with a strained smile drinking coffee. This wasn't supposed to happen. It was supposed to be just a day like any other.
She wanted to squeeze her eyes shut and open them again. So that it could reveal that she was still in bed and this was just a bad dream. Instead she watched the car pull away. Without even a backward glance her father was gone. Her mother grabbed her brother and pulled him in the house. She remained on the porch, hopeful that he would return.
_________________
"Now I am done." Alice said with a deep, sad breath.
I sat up uncomfortable with Alice's tale. It hits to close to home. So I pulled her up with every intention to leave this moment in the past.
"Let us dance Alice."
The leaves began to spin around us. The rainbow flashes across the sky. The winds laughing, Wonderland molding to my will. Alice didn't hesitate, as she once would have, instead she twirled in circles to the music of the wind’s laughter.