Diamonds and Stones

It had been two months since that day Jake had come to visit.

I couldn't say that those two months had been uneventful - I wasn't fond of lying.

It was a Thursday, and I was sitting at lunch with the usual suspects. Phil hadn't shown up today, and it was the third time this week. I sighed, and decided to give in to the temptation of sending him a text message.

Speaking of Phil, we had become rather great friends. And maybe, just maybe, I had a crush on him.

The one thing that bothered me was that I was no where near close to finding out why he was so shy, so thin, so reserved. I had been trying and trying, but he wouldn't let me in.

This kid wasn't dumb, at all. I wish I could be like him sometimes.

"Juliiettteee, woo-oo," Finn said, shaking his hand in front of my face.

"Hunh, what?"

"You're zoning out again."

"I'm sorry, just thinking..."

"Anyways, Jack was just saying that there's a party tonight, and I was wondering whether you and Lizzy were going."

"Oh, that. Yeah, why not?" I shrugged.

"Cool then," Dan grinned.

"Wait, I'll be back."

I got up and walked over to where Lizzy was sitting.

"So, hey guys," I said, plopping down on a chair. "There's a party tonight. You guys interested?"

"Yeah, sure," Molly nodded.

"I don't know..." Rachel shrugged.

"You know I'm going," Lizzy said, sticking her tongue out.

"Just making sure."

I got up and walked back to my table. "Yeah, she's coming."

Finn grinned even wider. "Awesome!"

Dan, Jack and I raised our eyebrows at him. I couldn't help noticing Dan's expression was a bit... Off.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing, nothing..."

---

That evening, after school, I took a detour to see Phil.

I knocked on his door, and waited a bit. After a minute, he opened the door.

"Yeah?"

"Phil!" I said, hugging him quickly, then taking a moment to look at him. His eyes were surrounded by dark circles, and he looked even more frail than usual. "What happened?"

"It's... I.... I just didn't sleep very well last night."

"For three days?"

He sighed. "I can't tell you, Juliette."

"I... Look, Phil. You're my friend. Like, a really good friend. And... I trust you, and you can trust me. So, you don't have to tell me now, or soon, but just know that I'm here for you, alright? And you can tell me anything."

I smiled at him, then hugged him again.

"Do you mean it?" he whispered.

"Of course I do."

"You promise?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die."

"Come inside."

"What?"

"I need to tell you something."

I let him go and followed him into the quiet house. He was alone: his parents were at work and his younger brother at school. I followed him up the familiar steps into his room.

"What is it?" I asked curiously.

He walked up to his cabinet and opened a drawer. I walked over and looked in.

Colored bracelets, resembling concert wristbands, were piled up along with papers written on with scribbly writing.

"Phil, are these..."

"Doctor prescriptions, hospital wrist... Wristbands."

I picked up one of the papers, and read through it quickly.

"B- Bulimia?"

"People seem to forget that guys can hate themselves, too," he said, looking at the ground.

"Is this where you disappear to, every now and then?"

He nodded. I took his hand and squeezed it. "Hey, it's alright."

I sat down beside him on his bed, then said, "But why, Phil?"

He sighed. "Because I've never felt good enough. When I was younger, they'd call me fat and stupid. And... When I... This just..."

He couldn't keep talking. His eyes were tearing up slightly, and he hastily wiped them away.

"But they never accepted me. I was always too weird, too confined... Never perfect. Never liked, forget about loved, apart from the members of my family, of course. But I... I can't help thinking they're just obliged to say those things to me... And... I've never... Told anyone all this, but... This is my story."

I didn't wait for him to say anything else. I hugged him for the third time, tightly. I could feel him crying softly, and I rubbed his back.

"Hey, you wanna know something?"

"Yeah?"

"You're perfect to me."

"Don't lie..."

"I'm not."

"Do... Do you mean it?"

I smiled. "Yeah. I do."

He sat up and looked at me, then smiled as well. "I- Thank you. I really... I don't know what to say."

"It's only the truth," I grinned. His smile wasn't something I witnessed often, so when he smiled, so did I.

He wiped his eyes, then sighed. "I'm sorry."

"For what, Phil?"

"For, just, dumping this all on you."

"Phil, stop. You're my best friend. That's what I'm here for."

"You'd consider me your best friend?" he asked, eyes lighting up.

"Of course! And I want to tell you something I've never told anyone else, as well..."

"You can trust me, Juliette."

"I know I can," I smiled. "That's why I'm telling you."

I took a deep breath and started, "Two years ago, my... My biological parents and sister died in a car crash. Um, and none of my relatives were eligible for taking care of me, so... Yeah. I was dumped in an orphanage. That's where this started."

I pulled up my sleeve and pushed aside my bracelets. He looked at my scars sadly, then me.

"I feel like I didn't deserve to live, while they were gone. And that's where Lizzy comes into the picture. Lizzy's parents... Died in a train wreck. And she came to the orphanage a couple days after me. We hit it off pretty fast... Long story short, we were both going through the same things and bonded, consequently reducing... This, drastically."

He nodded, telling me to continue.

"Nancy found us mid last year. And as soon as our school cycle at the orphanage ended for the summer, she adopted us and brought us here. So, yeah. I've never told anyone this, but this is my story... And Lizzy's, too, I guess."

He stayed silent for a while, then said, "We're all hiding so much more than we let on."

Then he surprised me and hugged me. (We should really rename this day to 'National Hug Day'.)

Tightly.

We just sat there, hugging, for a long time. Longer than friend, even best friend hugs should last.

But we didn't mind it. It felt nice to have someone there for you.