I Don't Love You

Song; Conspiracy by Paramore.
Talking to; Peter. & waiting for his text back before I ring his neck!
Mood; not sure.

I don't know why but I like doing that.

Well anyway, the time has come for the dreaded Author's Note. *enter dramatic music NOW*. I don't know why, but just like the ending to this story I wasn't ready to write it. And I'm still not ready. I'm just doing it to get it out of the way cause I ran around saying I would do it.

I remember when I first started this story. I don't know when it was exactly but it was like...March. I think. I wrote it in a blue notebook (not that you needed to know that) with rings, about 120 pages and 3 subjects (didn't need to know that either.) I didn't write it like a normal person would but I wrote it during school. And in an orange pen.

When I first started 'IDLY' I was just trying to do a fan-fiction. There was that site, mcr & more on myspace that had actually got me into fan-fiction in the first place. And I wanted to write a Frank Iero story, no idea why. And since I've been in love with Frank Iero and John Cena since forever I thought I should make a conflict story with me and them. I didn't want to use my real name cause I wanted that for another one (which I ended up doing) and I sign my name 'Alliyson' so I used that. It's kinda complicated looking, and it's pronounced like it looks [al-e-son].

I've revised the first chapter of 'I Don't Love You' a million times too. Mainly because Heaven Help Us was stuck in my head and I kept writing it in the story. But regardless, I love how I wrote it. Although that sounds kind of...conceited, it's true. It was cute and funny, Frank was cursing up a storm and I don't know. I loved my entrance, actually.

Frank Iero; wow. This man's a huge inspiration to tons of people and to think he's just a 25 year old man from Jersey. I love New Jersey, I'm always there but I've never been to where My Chem and Frank are from. I remember the first time I actually saw Frank. He made me laugh in the 'I'm Not Okay' video. And I thought he was the cutest one, always making people laugh. I don't know how or why but I was immediately drawn to him. And I have been since, gushing over his pictures and his jokes, screeching every time I saw him in a video. I know everyone thinks they are in love with Frank. I've seen tons of people who are 'Mrs. Iero' and hate Jamia. I don't hate her but psh, I don't know her. So yeah. Which is why Jamia isn't really in this story. I know that she's his wife/fiance/whatever but I wanted his girlfriend to be an evil character. Which is why I named her Demesne which btw is a totally made up name, it isn't even spelled the way it's pronounced; Demesne [pronounced: dee-mens]. It's like whoa, where does the 's' come in? Well anyway. That's why Jamia isn't in this. Cause I thought that would be rude and disrespectful to Frank and I'm all about respect. I didn't want to make Frank's character into a lovesick pansy (although that's kind of what he was) but I needed him to fall in love, and hard. And for him to be willing to do anything for Alliyson, although they've known eachother a short time.

John Cena; *sighs like a fan girl.* I remember the first time I ever even saw John Cena. I watched Smackdown! because of this guy named 'Mike Mizanin' from Real World on MTV. From the minute I saw HIM; it was love at first site. Although the guy is like so ugly and kinda looks like a frog. BUT BACK TO JOHN. Right so Mike was going to be on that challenge thing to find new wrestlers. And I watched all of Smackdown! to see him. I wasn't into Wrestling at the time solely because when I was younger, I used to watch WWF back with my neighbors. But then they moved and I stopped watching wrestling (that was about 2000). And right, back to the story. I was watching Smackdown! waiting for the challenge thing to come on and John Cena had a match. Love at first sight, lmfao. He was so cute! and white and thought he was a rapper and shit and I don't know. I loved it. And I was wondering why the hell everyone was into that whole 'you can't see me!' thing and now I knew why, haha. But yes, I loved every part of his performance as a wrestler. And so it began. This man has changed my life a lot since I started getting back into wrestling. He's a really interesting character on Raw and he's his own person. He doesn't take anyone's shit or anything. He raps, he wrestles, he's in a movie. (It's called The Marine, GO BUY IT! I have the unrated version.<33) I will never forget the lessons John Cena has taught me either, like 'Fear nothing, regret less', 'if you want some come get some', 'hustle loyalty respect', 'ruck fules (fuck rules)'. But yes, I didn't want to make John Cena seem like some lovesick little pansy either. He's actually a really STRONG man and he isn't afraid to show his emotions either. But yes, I needed him and Alliyson's relationship to be really really rocky, for him to always be touring and then for him to mess up and drive her away. And it worked out really well too.

Alliyson; yay! My favorite character. I don't know, she was supposed to be based a lot on a future version of myself. Like if I was older, what I would be like. What I would act like. But not so much me either. To be smart and philosophical. To know what I'm talking about too. Cause psh, half of the time I don't know what I'm talking about. xD But yes. Older, smarter version of me. She's supposed to be 25 (same age as Frank but younger than John). Yes, I do want two lip rings and that tattoo on my back and also on my stomach under my scar. But I'm not sure what else I want. I might want one across my chest too. But then I'll feel like people are always going to be reading it...Anyway. I didn't want to make myself seem too tantalizing and stuff, and have both men at my beck and call. And not only that, Gerard. Alliyson's history with Gerard goes like this; they met way back when but Alliyson knew Mikey first. and Mikey was chill with her and then Gerard and Alliyson would chill a lot. Go out and drink a lot. Supposedly, 'Bury Me In Black' can be about Alliyson, I guess. And so Gerard and Alliyson stopped talking until 'The Black Parade' was made because her friend Peter (who is no longer in that band, they broke up :'( ) opened for them and they bumped into each other. Yeah, corny. Yeah, cliche. But Alli(y)son doesn't care.

This isn't really a Romeo and Juliet type of thing solely because Frank and Alliyson knew they were in love about three months of knowing eachother. None of this two day bullshit that's in R&J. They met like what...February something. It was something in February. And how Alliyson just randomly showed up at their show? Priceless. I don't know, those chapters are my favorite. When 'I' first enter. Don't you love how I told Frank to push Demesne off his lap? I would do something like that too...Well anyway, moving along since this is already like ten times longer than my English Honors Final Essay...

I had loads of fun writing this story. This was the story that got me back into writing, if it wasn't for IDLY there would BE no 'This Is How I Disappear', 'Sweet Talk 101', 'Early Sunsets Over Monroeville', etc (Since I have so many...). I had missed writing so much and this was the story I got to do whatever I wanted with because of the fact that it was the baby and it was MY idea. So thank you IDLY for starting everything.

And thank YOU; reader for reading this crazy thing, commenting, whatever else anyone did. I'd also like to thank Sahina<3, frankieroishot (on quizilla), Emi; Kayla; and Nikki (RIP) from MCR&MORE on myspace, and anyone else who told me to keep writing it and all other mushy gushy stuff like that. *HUGS ALL AROUND*

Right now my toe hurts (i bumped it into the door in the kitchen) and I'm waiting for my dad to come and gimme money so I can go to the movies tomorrow. I really want to go, I wanna see Harry Potter!

So toodles reader; and say bye bye to I Don't Love You.
<333peace love and metal; allison.