I'm in Love With You

I looked at James, who was banging on his drums putting on a good show. I was only on this tour because we told the booking agency that I was dating Danny because for some reason only girlfriends were allowed to travel with the guys. James was my best friend. I love him. Not just as a friend but I was in love with him. I heard a squeal and I looked to my left and saw Charlotte, who is dating James. It’s okay. I know I’ll never be good enough for him. He wants the supermodel figure girls and I’m far from that. The show ended too soon and I was being pulled into a hug by Danny. We got to make this look real. He kissed my cheek and I just smiled but soon that faded when I saw James and Charlotte basically fucking in front of us.

“Will you two save it for the bedroom?” Danny said. The others laughed while James flipped Danny off. Danny grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the door.

“Hey wait, I haven’t hugged Natalie.” James said.

“Not my fault.” Danny shouted. I smiled, hiding it away from him with my other hand. I was very surprising to see that no fans were out here when we walked out here. I stood next to Danny on the other side of the bus door.

“So when are you going to tell him, Natalie?” Danny asked taking a drag off his cigarette. I shrugged.

“Bloody hell, grow some balls. Charlotte is a bitch. We all know that. James…he’s a fucking idiot.” Danny said. I shook my head.

“Just shut up before someone hears you say anything. Nothing is going to happen with us, fucker.” I said folding my arms.

“So tomorrow are we going to pretend to break up since it’s our last day?” Danny asked.

“Yes. Thanks by the way for doing this for me.” I said hugging him.

“It’s no problem, Nat. You are a good girl.” He said squeezing me tight.

“But you really should tell James though because you might lose him forever.” Danny said.

“I’ll tell him okay.” I said.

“Tell who what?” I heard James ask. I spun around to see James standing there, smoking a cigarette. Danny laughed. I flipped him off as I watched him walk away.

“Where’s Charlotte?” I asked.

“She’s sleeping in my bunk.” He said. I nodded.

“So what were you and Danny talking about?” James asked. I looked around. I didn’t really want to tell him. I needed more time to prepare myself for this but nothing was going to have it.

“Uhh…James, we’ve been friends for a really long time.” I paused as I tried to control my breathing.

“We’re best friends, Nat.” He corrected me. I rolled my eyes. Does it really matter because after I tell him this, I’m sure he’ll never want to speak to me again?

“Okay, so we’re been best friends for a really long time which what I’m about to say will probably fuck this whole shit up.” I said. He sighed deeply.

“Bloody hell, Nat. Is it really that fucking bad?” He shouted. I was angry. I was furious. You just don’t go shouting out that you’re in love with your best friend.

“Shut the fuck up, James. I’m trying to figure out a way to tell you that I’m fucking in love with you, you bastard.” I shouted then quickly covered my mouth and started at James, who stood there, shocked. He shook his head.

“Natalie, I’m sorry. I’m sorry…I just don’t…don’t feel the same about you.” He said tossing his cigarette away and walking away. I fell against the bus, sliding down it. Fuck.

“I’m sorry, Nat.” Danny said sitting beside me, pulling me into a hug. I hugged him tightly.

“Let’s get you inside and to bed.” Danny said. I just sat there. Danny stood up and helped me up. We walked onto the bus. Ben looked up at us, frowning. I walked over to him and cuddled up to him. He was my brother after all.

“I’m sorry, lil sis.” He said. I felt him kiss the top of my head. I shrugged and soon I was drifting off the sleep. It didn’t feel like I was asleep for very long until I heard screaming. It was Charlotte throwing one of her bitch fits. I looked up at who I was laying on. I remember falling asleep cuddled up to my brother but the person I was laying on was Danny.

“Why does she have to be here? She’s ruining everything.” Charlotte shouted. I knew she was talking about me.

“She’s part of the family, Charlotte, whether you like it or not. Not only is she Ben’s sister but she’s always dating Danny.” They’re tour manger shouted back.

“They’re not dating, you fuck. They’re only pretending so Natalie can be a fucking whore and whore around.” Charlotte said. That pissed me off. I sat up the stood up and marched over to her.

“You have about five seconds to shut the fuck up or I’ll make you shut up forever, bitch.” I said barely above a whisper.

“James, Natalie is threatening.” Charlotte ran off whining to James. I rolled my eyes and felt arms around my waist and a kiss on the cheek.

“I’m sorry about last night.” I said turning around to see Danny.

“We’re friends. It’s cool. Besides, today is the last day of tour. We’re good.” Danny said. I nodded.

Xxxxxxx
Two weeks later…

I was laying around the apartment, waiting for Ben to get back with some ice cream. I just don’t feel like leaving the place hardly ever. I don’t go to practice. I don’t do anything with the guys anymore. I felt bad but I just couldn’t face James. The door opened and I heard ruffling noises. I stood up and walked to the door. It was Ben with about ten different flavors of ice cream.

“I couldn’t remember what kind of ice cream you liked and I left my phone in my room.” Ben said. I laughed.

“We’re going to have to have a fucking ice cream party to get rid of all this ice cream, Ben.” I said going through all of the bags. Ben smiled widely.

“I’ll call the guys up.” He said running into his room. Fuck, what did I just do?

“They’ll be here in thirty minutes.” Ben said. I shrugged.

“You’re going to have to face him sometimes, Nat.” Ben said. I shrugged once again. Thirty minutes went by way too fast because there was a knock on the door. Ben bounced towards the door, swinging it open to reveal Danny and some blonde girl. I smiled at the girl.

“You must be Natalie. I’ve been waiting to meet you.” She said hugging me. I stared at Danny shocked.

“Natalie, this is Maya, my girlfriend.” Danny said. I smiled wide.

“Oh gosh. Danny, you have a girlfriend. I’m so happy for you.” I said hugging him.

“What’s up guys?” I heard Sam’s voice. I looked up and saw the others standing there. I notice that Charlotte wasn’t with James. I looked at Ben, who just smiled. We all gathered around and made ourselves a bowl of ice cream and ate it. I was sitting there in my own little world when someone stood in front of me. I looked up from my bowl and saw James standing there.

“Can we talk?” He asked. I shrugged. He grabbed the bowl out of my hand, putting it on the table then grabbed my hand and pulling me away from everyone. I knew they were all staring and I’m pretty sure they all knew what was happening.

“Why do you want to talk, James?” I asked. We were in my room.

“We just…we can’t leave how we left it.” James said.

“If I remember correctly, you are the one that walked away from what I said.” I said. He nodded.

“I know but…fuck.” He said rubbing the back of his neck.

“Where’s Charlotte?” I asked curiosity got the best of me because I have been wondering that since he showed up.

“We broke up last week, Nat. If you had showed up to practice at all these last two weeks then you’d know.” James said. I shrugged.

“Why do you always shrug?” He asked. I went to shrug again but caught myself.

“I don’t know, James because I have nothing to say, which is why I’m leaving the room.” I said turning around to leave. I felt James grab my arm, spinning me around.

“We aren’t finished talking, Nat.” He said. I nodded.

“What more is there to say? I confess I was in love with you. You told me that you didn’t return those feelings. We’re friends. I just needed time to get my head around it all, okay.” I said. He shook his head.

“No. No. No. Damnit. No.” He said. He looked around probably to try to form the words he wanted to say. He still had a good grip on my arm and he was a lot closer than I thought he was. Our faces only inches apart.

“Natalie.” He said before smashing his lips against mine. Even though I figured it was going to happen, it still took me by surprise. I smiled. This was really happening. James and I were kissing…making out if you wanted to call it. The kiss left me breathless but wanting more after we parted away.

“I’m in love with you, Nat. I was scared to tell you. I was such a chicken shit.” He said pressing his lips against mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck. He picked me up and we went over to the bed. We made out for what felt like hours. After at least thirty minutes of making out, we cuddled up together and drifted off the sleep. Was we together? Who knows but I was happen just knowing that James loved me.