2,000 Light Years Away

It's almost 4 o'clock in the morning and heather and I was siting out on the balcony smoking a blunt together. We've been talking about everything and anything at all, just like old times when we stayed up playing dolls or talk about boys. But instead of dolls and boys, we talked about sex, past relationships, previous relationship, and parties. A regular teenage girl conversation. Mom and Rob haven't gotten home yet and I was slightly worried. I tried paging mom but I had no reply. Whoever they are with I'm sure they are having a blast without me. "Hey... if you don't mind me asking but... have you spoken to Jermaine ever since... y'know, that whole situation?" My heart dropped and my body went solid ice at the mention of that bastard's name. Jermaine is an old boyfriend I have recently ended it with after two dream-like years together.my hope was to far high up and I gotten a big reality check that it was just to good to be true. And that shit like that don't exist anymore. Despite of all he have put me through, I really liked Jermaine. He was sweet, funny, tall, charming, and handsome. We had conversations about our future and with each other in it. We had a strong bond and he played it very well. Come to find out that asshole didn't mean what he said. He was fucking around with other girls and when I told him I thought I might have been pregnant he said, and I quote, "Well, find someone else to take care of that kid. Because I'm out. It's over." My trust issues have gotten a lot worse since then. I was beyond hurt and I'm so happy what we had wasn't love. It was just a fantasy I wanted to come true. But we were young and we didn't know any better than to play with fire at a young age. Now I know not to ever get myself into something so foolish like that again. for my own selfish reasons, I don't want to get hurt like I did.

"Nope, and I don't plan to." I answered her question as I inhaled the blunt. She smiled sympathetically, I smiled back at her but with pride. Just to show her I was still okay. I'm not weak and she knows that. Nothing can break me down nor tear me apart. Daddy always taught me how to be strong like him. He was my soldier and always will be. Not a day goes by I don't think about him. Lights flashed at our backyard and we heard the engine run until it died down. Laughter filled the silence and I heard our front door open. I looked at Heather and hurried her to hide all of the evidence of us having weed in the house. Mom will have a fit! Especially now that we just moved in and all. Once everything was cleared, I walked downstairs and found mom and some... man in our new average sized living room. Mom would NEVER bring in company in the house if the house was a mess. And our house was packed with untouched boxes and bins. So what the hell is so special about this dude?!

"Our room is upstairs across from Rob's room. Oh, sweetheart I can't wait for you to move in. The house is perfect for all four of us. I'm just scared of Lyrics, I'm not sure how she will take the news."

Move in?! Us FOUR?! NEWS?! I'm pretty sure my fucking eyeballs are almost out my skull and my ears are shooting smoke out with fury. I didn't even notice my tightly balled up fist's that trembled on both my sides. I didn't want to act out now, I was too high and too pissed to even think everything I want to say. So instead, I walked back upstairs and slammed my door loud and hard enough for her to know that this whole 'News', isn't news anymore once I wake up later on. Heather was looking at me with the biggest grin on her face. "What's wrong with you?" She giggled. I knew she wouldn't understand let alone take it seriously since she is completely somewhere up in space. "Let's just go to sleep Hamster," I called her by her nickname. "I'll tell you tomorrow." She layed facing the wall and I just layed facing the ceiling. My body and my mind wouldn't allow me to sleep as it replayed the dreadful moment downstairs.

**
I couldn't even enjoy my warm shower later on that morning. I threw on some grey leggings and a black wife beater. I wasn't in the mood to pick out a cute outfit for the day. And plus, I gotta paint my room today. Heather was still sleeping like a slob with her blonde hair all over her face and her DNA on my pillow. I shook my head at her as I smiled. I slowly walked downstairs and peeked around the house to see if anyone was here. It was pretty silent and-

"Whatcha doin'?"

I nearly jumped out my own skin. Rob was laughing uncontrollably behind me and I smacked him on his tight muscled stomach. "You asshole! You know better than to creep up on me like that!" I glared at him.

"Sorry Lyrics, but why are you walking around like you're Nancy Drew?"

"I'm pretty sure you know too, Rob." I hopped on the island in the kitchen as Rob fished through the packed up boxes that held in our kitchen utensils.

"Hmm, about mom's new boyfriend-" I choked on my own saliva at the sound of 'New Boyfriend'. "Yep, I knew that. Mom invited him over for dinner last night. Then I went to see a few people." He poured us both coco pebbles, adding milk in it also. My appetite was gone and fury build up in me once again. Mixed emotions was going on inside me at the moment. I didn't know weather to cry first or throw everything at the wall. But instead, I just looked down at my hands with a frown on my face.

"What the fuck is she thinking Rob?" I said softy. "I mean, why now? After everything that had happened through these past few years, why now?! Is that why we moved back here?! Just so she can be happy with HIM?!" The rage in me was growing and growing and I didn't know how to calm myself.

"Whoa, whoa, calm down Lyrical." He rubbed my back softly.

"I don't want to calm down Robert! I want to understand why she's doing this to us! To daddy!" Tears began threatening me to spill out. But I couldn't. Not now at least.

"Lyrics, you gotta look at mom's view too. You know how miserable she been ever since dad died. She needs happiness too. C'mon he's not even that bad anyways he's actually pretty cool and he's actually the one who bought us this house believe it or not."

"I'm moving out."

"Don't be stupid Lyrics, just get to know the dude."

Rob did have a point. I'm being selfish and I'm only looking at my point of view instead of her's. I just wish she told us sooner than later. She know's I hate surprises, especially surprises that involves a man that think's he can take my father's place. Well, he will never be you daddy just know that. I looked up at Rob and he smiled at me, he knew he got me. I sighed in defense. "Alright. But you know how I am so I can't promise you anything."

"As long as you try, Lyrics. That's all it matters." He ruffled my hair.

"ROBERT!" Heather jumped on Rob causing my poor brother to scream.

"Jesus! Heather, I missed you too but that is not the way to approach someone like me!"

**
I sat on my mattress in my room with Heather next to me and Scooter on my lap, licking my soft skin of my thigh. I didn't know what to do at this point. I didn't know if I should accept my mother's happiness. That's like accepting murder. Okay, Yeah, I admit that I am over reacting just a bit but, really, if you were in my shoes I'm positive you would feel the same way that I'm feeling. Heather tried telling me everything is going to be alright, that I would just have to talk to her about this whole thing. Knowing my attitude and how quickly I can get from 0 to 100, It wouldn't be just 'Talk'. It would be chaos. I don't even know what I'm more pissed about. The fact that she basically lied to us or the fact that she is moving on way to fast for my liking. And she don't even realize that she's dragging us with her as she moves on. My phone began to ring startling me out of my thoughts. I picked it up to my ear, "Hello?" I answered.

"Um, hey may I speak to Lyrics?" A boy replied with a typical teenage boy voice.

"This is she. May I ask who's speaking?"

"Oh, hey, It's Billie Joe. Y'know from last night at Gilmans?" He sounded nervous. Possibly shaky if you asked me.

"Yeah, hey what's up?"

"Nothing really I was just wondering if you're going to be busy today?"

"Hmm," I began nibbling at the inside of my cheek as I thought about my schedule. Beside talking to my mom, no I'm most likely free today. "Nah, why what's up?"

"I was just wondering if you can meet up with me at Tightwad Hill let's say, around 5?"

"Yeah, I'm down for that. I'll see you later then."

"Cool, cool. Bye Lyrics."

"Bye Billie."

And with that I hung up the phone with a grin creeping up on my face. Mom wasn't home yet, so that leaves me time to get ready in peace. It was only 3:45 p.m. "So are you going to tell me what your plans are?" Heather asked as she watched me fish through my boxes of clothes.

"I'm meeting up with Billie Joe at Tightwad Hill." With a hint of excitement in my tone. She smiled and wiggled her eyebrows seductively.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do," She winked. "I'm going to see my beautiful girlfriend. So I will call you later babe." She kissed my cheek and I pouted.

"Okay, tell her I said hey and to come by for a visit."

"M'kay."

She walked out my door and I looked at scooter. "Well, It's just me and you now boy."

The sound of the clock ticking was the only thing penetrating the silence. Rob had just left to hang out with his old times buddy's and I was left alone here, waiting for my mom to get back home from her new job. She told me she should be getting off of work a bit after three. It's a quarter to five. I grew more impatient by the minute so I would have to talk to her when I get home later. I grabbed a pink sticky note and wrote 'Be back later, xoxox'. I peeled the small piece of paper off and placed it on the fridge.

**
I zipped up my black hoodie as I waited on Tightwad Hill for Billie. I was leaning back on my hands on top of a picnic table that showed a view of the football field. It was gloomy out and the air had that rain scent. The Clash was blaring out my head phones and my hallucinations played with my head as I continued inhaling my joint that took me to paradise. But I didn't care, in fact I loved it. I loved it when my bud took me out of reality and enter's me to a whole new world. This world is nothing compared to reality. It's my world, where you can do whatever you want. And I wish that my world was reality. I can dream, can't I? Giggles filled me up and little purple and pink bunny's danced around me, the sky was green and the grass was blue. I began to laugh at myself as crazy as it sounds. But I just don't care. My eyelids closed, a mixture of purple, orange, green, and pink geometric patterns cover the darkness behind my eyelids. If only this feeling of pure ecstasy lasted forever. Everything around me was so surreal.

"Lyrics!" I heard someone screamed making me open my eyes. Billie Joe was walking up the hill.

"Hey," He smiled as he took a seat next to me. "I see you're a pothead as well, Yeah?" He pointed at my joint that I still had in my hands.

"Oh, Yeah," I giggled a bit. "Want a puff?"

He shrugged and took it from my hands. He took a long drag and closed his eyes as he inhaled his own problems away. Just like everyone does when they smoke weed. "Man," He exhaled. "That is some great shit. What is it?"

"Some loud." I laughed. "One of the best."

He nodded in agreement as he took one last drag before handing it back to me. "So," He started off. "Tre told me you lived here before. What made you come back... here." He made a disgusted face and looked around the streets when he spoke the last word, like it was a disease.

"Well, where I previously lived at, La Habra specifically, wasn't the ideal city my mother expected. Now I'm not saying that Rodeo is, but here is where a lot of our childhood memories were created. Everyone I love, friends and family, lives here. And the only reason why we left is because we were going through some stuff so we had to leave. Ever since my father passed away when I was nine years old, shit just went downhill." I looked at him. He had that sympathetic look in his eyes as I passed him the joint. "You can finish that one. I'm going to roll up another one." I laughed.

He chuckled before saying, "Y'know, my dad died when I was ten years old." He looked out at the field as he stuffed his hands in his sweater. "So, I know how you feel."

He looked at me with his emarld green eyes as they glisten from the sunlight. I smiled at him not really sure what to say. I was to high to even understand what the fuck I'm saying. "So, tell me some things about you. Tre only told me basic shit like, your age is seven-teen, you're birthday is May fifth, and you're favorite color is sea-green. I would like to know more about you." He smiled as he leaned back on the table.

"Well," I started as I crossed my legs. "What would you like to know? I'm not very interesting..."

"Hmm, what's you're music taste?"

"Oh! I am in love with punk rock. I mean I love other types of rock but punk stands out more to me. I guess it's because I can relate to it a lot. Like, for example, The Clash. They help me understand the riots that are created. And The Ramones?! Ugh, I love them. It's like, they speak my teenage life and how I feel about growing up. Punk, to me, is just something I can actually relate to more than I can relate to myself. And--I'm sorry I'm babbling..." I looked down at my hands in embarrassment. I tend to lose myself in a conversation, I don't really know how to stop talking. That's one of the many things people don't like about me. But I never actually cared enough to change that about me.

"No, no! It's perfectly fine it's just shows your not a socially awkward girl." He laughed. "So, please go on. I'm really interested in you're opinion about the punk scene." He smiled as he also crossed his legs in front of me so that our knees touched.

"Well, just in general music to me is everything. So does everyone else in my family." I smiled.

"That explains you're name. Lyrical. I'm really fond of that name it's really unique."

"Yeah, my dad was the one that picked out the name for me. Ever since I was five years old he called me his favorite song..." It's sad to say that now, those are just memories I hold so close to my broken heart.

"That's sweet. I'm pretty sure you're a beautiful song." He smiled at me. I couldn't help but blush.

"Thank you."

**
Hours has passed by as we layed on the clean cut grass on Tightwad hill. My bag of pot was empty and we were higher than the universe itself. We played with each other's hands without even knowing we were, and we talked about anything and everything. Most we had in common. We were both broken, we had a broken family, a broken heart, and a broken life. The only thing we didn't have in common was our school life. He was a poor rebellious student and I was a high honor roll rebellious girl. But I didn't care. "You're really cool, Lyrical." He giggled. "And fucking gorgeous." He said as he intertwined his fingers in mine.

"You're hallucinations are playing with you're mind." I simply said as I sat up and looked at the sky. It was full of stars and the moon was smack in the middle, shining down at us. I felt him sit up next to me.

"I know what I'm saying. You really are beautiful. I'm not just talking about your looks, it's everything about you. Even you're heart no matter how broken it is."

I looked at him to find him starring at me. I smiled and to my surprise he moved his head forward towards mine to kill the distance between us. I wasn't sure if I wanted to kiss him, my emotions were all over the place and we were both high.

"I have to go um... it's getting pretty late." I whispered as our lips was nearly about to touch. He nodded slowly as he backed away.

"I'll walk you home?"

"That will be nice." I smiled.

**
The walk home wasn't awkward. It was quiet but it was peaceful, we shared a few words here and there and a few giggles. "I would like to take you out on a proper date, if you would like." He sounded nervous, he also looked like it too as he rubbed the back of his neck. I giggled at his adorable actions and said, "I would love to."

We walked up the steps of my front porch and just I was about to walk in he kissed my cheek. "Goodnight Lyrics," He smiled. "I'll call you later."

I nodded as I felt my cheeks burn and my stomach do a flip. When I closed the door behind me, I leaned against it and smiled down at my feet. The house was still empty so I just went straight towards my room.

You know that feeling in your stomach when your on a roller-coaster and at the very top, you just drop? Yeah, I had that feeling in my stomach and it felt good. But then, that feeling went away as I just realized something.

No! Lyrics, this is not what you're suppose to feel! This is the same exact feeling Jermaine made you feel and look how you ended up. The bastard nearly ruined you're life and just didn't care.

He also, ruined my fucking mind. And made my heart worse than what it's already is from the damage of my past. Because of him I don't know how to trust. I didn't want to be a fool and go through that again.