Run My Darlings, Run

The days passed slowly, with Liesel doing all the work while I carved my knife. I couldn’t do much – my feet hurt when I stood up, throbbed when I stood up for too long and whenever I tried to walk I collapsed in a heap on the ground. So the days monotously dragged on, leaving me with little or nothing to do. It made Liesel laugh to see me so helpless, she was usually the helpless one while I stood over looking after her, but now it was her turn. It was a bit strange when you’ve been the oldest all your life looking after the younger ones, and then suddenly they’re looking after you. She gathered water, she scavenged for food, she made simple, uncooked meals of nuts and berries – everything I would normally do.
I rasped the rock over my knife for the one thousandth time when I heard the screams. Liesel sat bolt upright next to me. She stared at me with big owl eyes, expecting me to do something. The screams went on and on, and then a gun shot. The screaming intensified, terrified yells for help and begging for mercy could also be heard. Running feet could be heard, and they were getting louder, and louder, and closer and closer.
Liesel sobbed, and I quickly pushed her towards the nearest tree.
“Climb!” I yelled at her. She scampered up the tree as quick as a flash, and then sat on the highest branch, looking fearfully down at me.
“What about you?” she whimpered.
I’ll be fine, take care of yourself, don’t worry about me!” The din was so loud that it hurt my ears. More shots were heard, more screaming and crying coming our way.
The first person crashed through the bushes. It was a girl, no older than myself. Her hair was a matted, mangled mess, and every inch of her was coated in a thick layer of blood. Her eyes were wild - desperation showed all over her face as she looked wildly for an escape. Jew was written all over her. She sobbed loudly, and the tears made little clear rivers down her red face. Terrified, she raced past me, uttering one word.
“Run!” she screamed, and then fell down dead, a bullet in her back.
I looked desperately for somewhere to hide, but the available places were far beyond my reach. I sat shaking and shivering on the rock, not knowing what to do. My mind was numb with fear, my brain just wouldn’t work.
“The leaves,” Liesel called softly. “The leaves Hans.” I looked down at the thick carpet of leaves coating the forest floor. I looked back up at Liesel. She nodded once, and then disappeared back into the tree.
I flung myself to the floor, scrabbling madly at the leaves, throwing them over my body, frantically trying to cover myself before they came. I knew that if I didn’t cover every single bit of me they would find me, and when they found me they would kill me. I heaped the last few leaves on me and then lay still, holding my breath, not daring to make a noise. My ears were alert, straining to hear the smallest sound.
The heavy boots crunched over the leaves. I fought a scream, pinching my wrist hard, so hard that blood and tears flowed freely. The crunching drew louder, and louder and closer, and closer. Then they abruptly drew to a halt. I stiffened, wondering if they had seen me, but they were only examining the dead girl, making sure she was properly dead.
“Damn Jews, I knew we should have just poisoned them. It would have been so much easier,” a soldier spat. He sounded no more than a hand space away. He kicked angrily at the leaves on the ground, narrowly missing the leaves that covered me.
“We’d better go get help to track them,” the other replied sullenly.
“Why bother? They’ll die in the forest anyway. Starvation, fall down a cliff and break their neck, bears, wolves…”
“Wolves?” he interrupted, voice shaking.
“Yeah, wolves. What, you aren’t scared of a couple of overgrown dogs are you?” the soldier teased. The other gulped loudly, looking around nervously as if he expected a wolf to come out and attack at any minute. His friend laughed loudly. I took pity on him. He wasn’t the only one afraid of wolves. “Come on you big scaredy cat. We’ll just tell them we killed them all, alright?”
“Alright,”
They trudged away, the soldier still teasing him about his fear of wolves. I waited until I could hear their footsteps no more, and then sat up. My body groaned in protest – I had been lying for so long that pins and needles ran all up and down my body. I collapsed once more in the leaves, huffing in frustration. A soft sob came from the tree. I had completely forgotten about Liesel.
“How can they do this? How can they kill us like this and not fell guilt?” she said in a small voice. She sounded so lost and confused. I felt my heart break. She was only a child, and yet she had seen more trauma and terror in her short years than a person should ever see in their lifetime. It shouldn’t be this way.
“I don’t know,” I whispered truthfully. Papa had always told me that it was a great crime to kill an animal, and how people find killing people a crime, and not animals. But he was wrong. People killed hundreds of us Jews every day, and no one so much as batted an eyelid. I was as confused as Liesel, maybe even more so.
“Hans,” Liesel started hesitantly.
“Mmm?” I said.
“Are you afraid to die?” It took me a long time to answer.
“I don’t know.” I answered quietly. “I don’t know what it will feel like. I don’t know if it’ll be slow or quick, painless or painful. I don’t know everything Liesel.” I said tiredly.
“But,” she started.
“No Liesel, I just need some time to think for a moment, alright?” I cut her off.
She sniffed, and squinted into the sunlight. Then she frowned. “They’re coming back.”
“Who?”
“The soldiers.”
“What!”
“They’re coming back!”
My heart skipped a beat. Why were they coming back? I struggled to get back under the leaves, but my body just wouldn’t work.
“Damn,” I swore under my breath, trying more and more desperately to cover myself up. But my efforts were in vain. They emerged into the clearing when I had only covered half of myself up. They stared at me as if they could hardly believe their eyes, then slowly lifted their guns from their shoulder.
Liesel, stay hidden, Liesel, stay where you are, don’t move Liesel. These thoughts ran all around my head, it was all I could think about. I prayed that she would remain where she was, that she wouldn’t get hurt. But my prayers were unanswered.
She let out a yell and dropped out of the tree. She flung herself at the soldiers and started lashing out at their faces. She punched one in the nose, and it bled rapidly, staining his smart uniform. For a second they did nothing, they were too stunned to move. But then they came to their senses and fought back. One of them gave Liesel a blow that nearly took off her head. She stumbled wildly, and then fell to her knees, panting heavily.
The soldiers glared down at her, then at me. They seemed to come to a decision.
“We take the girl, leave the boy. He’ll never make it back to camp anyway. Not with feet like that,” said the one with the bloody nose. My heart stopped. I looked in horror at them, standing there roughly holding my sister.
“No!” I yelled. “Leave her here, with me, put her down!” My outburst did nothing; they acted like they didn’t hear me. They threw Liesel over their shoulder like a sack of potatoes and walked away. I struggled furiously to my feet, tears streaming down my face. I swayed violently, but I used the last of my strength to launch myself at them. I pulled their hair, I punched them, I screamed at them, but they just threw me to the ground heavily. The breath was knocked out of me, and I just lay there, gasping.
The soldiers looked to one another, and then one strode over to me. He lifted his gun. He pointed it at my head. Liesel shrieked in terror, and I trembled violently. He withdrew the gun, turning away. But before I could utter a sigh of relief, he hurled it at my head. It bashed against me, hard. The last thing I saw before I lost consciousness was Liesel, being hit over the head in a similar fashion, slumping over the soldiers shoulder.