Konahagakure High School

Next class was Health with Miss Shizune. The class room was further down the hall in room 110. The desks were facing each other, the girls on one side, the guys on the other. The amount of girls in the class was nearly even to the amount of males, but the guys had one or two on us for once.

As we approached, there were pairs of students holding—rather life like—baby dolls. Some of them looked disdainful, some uncomfortable, some were actually kind of smug—and in an arrogant way. I gave Lauren a bewildered look and she shrugged.

We walked in and took our seats.

"Good afternoon class." Shizune chimed, "I'm glad to see your smiling faces today," There were a few groans of acknowledgement, which I brushed off. She was only so chipper because we were going to get a project in her class today too. That was the only time she was overly excited. Usually, the projects were sort of cool or interesting, so I was actually interested to see what we'd be doing.

"If you haven't noticed any of them already, You're all going to become parents!" The class became dead silent.

"What." Lauren gave her a horrified and dumbfounded look.

"That's right," She smiled writing out the project on the board, "You and a male partner of my choosing will care for a baby. Not a real one of course—only a doll, but you'll still have to care for it like it's a real child outside of school."

"Why can't we choose our own partners?" Someone—Ino I think—protested.

"Well, that would be unfair. There would be a classroom brawl over your temporary baby's father." She smiled knowingly. Smart woman. "Now, I'm going to read off the names of your partners. There is one or two more males in this class than females, so you will get an alternative assignment if you don't wish your partner to be male."

I could see Maruka's face light up in hope across the room. Part of me wished that he would be paired with a female just to spite him, but then I started feeling bad for the poor girl that would be stuck with him. Then I started hoping it wasn't me. Same with Sasuke.

Definitely not Sasuke... I prayed silently.

"Now, as I read off your partner, I want you to go sit by them." She said, "Once I call out the name of your partner, there will be no switching. None what-so-ever. If you don't like your partner...well, tough. And if you don't like it then, you can go to Lady Tsunade."

There were only a few names that stood out to me as she called them systematically, "Kiba and Hinata." Kiba waved to her as she moved next to him. Then, "Naruto and Sakura." I thought Naruto was going to die from happy dancing as he sat by her. Several more names were called, until, "Maruka and Lauren."

The color visibly drained from both of their faces, "What!?" Both of them shouted. There were several girls around me who, for once, gave her looks of sympathy rather than disgust.

"Go." Miss Shizune ordered softly. She continued reading off names as Lauren angrily sat by Maruka. She called out several more names, "Ino and Sai... Kagame and Hazaru..." She was nearly running out of students, and Pretty boy and I still hadn't been called.

I began to pray silently again, "Sasuke and—" Please don't be me, please don't be me... "-Hana."

"Oh—fuck me..." I muttered under my breath.

"You're so lucky..." Sakura said to me quietly.

"I'd trade with you any day." I grumbled as I stood. It wasn't like he was getting up anytime soon. I sat in the empty desk next to him as Shizune finished calling out names and offered the last two an alternative assignment.

"You do your part, I'll do mine, Uchiha, and everyone's happy." I grumbled.

"I could say the same for you." He grumbled back.

"Now, there will be some rules." Miss Shizune announced, "You'll trade off with your partner everyday, so today, the mothers will have it, and the next day the fathers will have it. During the day in school, the child's monitor will be off. After school, it will be turned on—and it keeps time, so don't try to trick me." She said. "After school, you'll care for it, dress it, feed it, and everything else that parents do—including changing its diapers." There was a groan of detest from some of the boys, "You even have to trade off during the weekends."

"When does the project end?" Sakura muttered solemnly.

"Next Monday, so you have five or so days." She smiled, "The teachers will keep an eye on things for me, so that means you can neglect your children."

"Great..." I muttered irritably. I leaned as far away from the pretty boy as I could manage without seeming obvious. I could feel the glares from girls around the room boring into me from all around, but I didn't want to be in this situation either.

What was it with teachers and randomizers thinking that Uchiha and I are a good idea? We're like matter and anti-matter. We don't create, we destroy. Our cooperation could literally prove dangerous for everyone in the school. All I knew was, the day we get along, will be the day pigs fly.

Lady Shizune wheeled a cart with a box on it from behind her desk. As she passed each pair, she paused for a moment, almost as if to specifically pick out the doll that looked like the parents. And the way she so meticulously chose them, I wouldn't be shocked if that were true. I had to bite my lip so I wouldn't laugh when she handed Lauren a child that looked like it could possibly be a result in her mating with Maruka. The irony in it was enough to make anyone laugh at this odd couple.

Poor Lauren, she looked so miserable and awkward with a baby—doll or not—in her arms. Most of the girls looked rather comfortable, most of them seeming to know the proper way to hold a child.

When Miss Shizune stopped in front of us, she paused a little longer than she did for most couples. Of course, most couples didn't make it apparent that they were trying to sit as far apart as they could possibly manage. Even Sakura sat relatively close to a jubilant Naruto, so I'm sure we were an odd couple to behold.

She pulled out a blanket wrapped doll with raven colored hair and placed it in my arms. It was one of those dolls whose eyelids opened and closed. It's eyes were a chocolate color, which told me that she was choosing them based on their parents appearances. Great... The child could have been created by us... Even better. I have a child with Sasuke Uchiha. As if other girls didn't hate me enough. Now, they'll hate me because my baby daddy is the junior class' hot shot pretty boy.

Great... Super... Wonderful.

Naruto caught my eye cross the class room and gave me an apologetic look. I just scowled in return. I didn't want to be me today. I would love to be Sakura right now... At least I know Naruto would give it his all, and I might actually find it tolerable. But, I just had to be paired with Sasuke Uchiha.

I could't help it. I sulked the entire rest of the class. Nothing anyone said helped me. All of the glares on my back only added onto the weight of my sense of foreboding that this unfortunate turn of events gave me.

The next class of the day was Literature and Linguistics. Ebisu's class. I absolutely detested this class... Not that I didn't do well or anything, but Ebisu was the worst teacher on the face of the planet. It was fortunate that I was very well educated before this class. Otherwise, I would be stuck like most of the students in this class that hated to listen to him drone on in lecture after lecture. Sometimes, I could have sworn that was all he knew how to do. If it wasn't a long, boring ass lecture about the actual subject matter, then it was about studying. If it wasn't about studying, then it was about the Hokage. If it wasn't about that, it was something else. This man never shuts up.

Today, we were going over basic language mechanics that anyone with half a brain could recite. Ain't isn't a word. There are apostrophes in contractions. A complete sentence has a subject and a verb. An adjective describes a noun. Blah...blah...blah.

I didn't bother taking notes. I didn't bother even listening to a word he said. I knew every bit of it, but, apparently, he still felt the need to ramble on about how inarticulate the members of the junior class were—completely ignoring the fact that this class held some of the highest scoring students of our grade. I just wanted this class to end. Today was Wednesday, so we had homeroom today. Then after that, I would have two hours of detention after school with Guy-sensei. Then, it was homeward bound. I just needed to get through the rest of the day, and I was free.

And just like every Wednesday, he gave us an essay due next Monday. Why was everything due on Mondays? I couldn't help my bitterness.

I felt the sigh of relief that rolled through me when the bell rang. It was time for homeroom. I quite adored Kakashi-sensei. This morning's mishap didn't mar my view of him as the greatest teacher in this school. He was much more laid back in homeroom, giving us the chance to do homework or make up work. If we weren't working, he let us talk and joke with our friends as long as we weren't too wild. If we were well behaved in this homeroom, we could do as we wished, just as long as it wasn't against the rules, and he would just sit at his desk, reading his Make-out Paradise books.

I continued to help Lauren with the Math notes, forcing her to ignore the picture of Uchiha's severed head on my paper.

"But...It's just so...realistic," She stifled a snicker.

"Shut up and pay attention." I grumbled, popping the side of her head.

Naruto eventually gravitated over to us, "Hey."

"I thought you were with your baby mama." I smirked at him, some of my irritation at Lauren disappearing.

"She started wanting child support so I'm leaving her alone." He smirked back. I mouthed, "wow," and shook my head. "Naw, that wasn't it. Sasuke was being a douche bag," He shot an irritated glare in his direction, "and you know how it is with pretty boys..."

"Pretty boys are douche bags." I muttered.

"Yes they are." He agreed, "So what about you and your baby daddy?"

I groaned, covering my face, "Ugh, don't remind me..."

"You gotta work with him." Naruto muttered, pity lining his words.

"I know...I know... I just... I don't feel like thinking about it..." I muttered. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Kiba glance over at us. He turned back to his group, muttered something, and turned my way.

"Hey chicky," He muttered, "Tough break getting stuck with Uchiha."

"Yeah...How's it going between you and your baby mama?" I muttered, motioning to Hinata with my head. Hinata's arms were supporting their baby doll—which, like all of the others in the room, could have belonged to her and Kiba.

"Eh, I can't complain." He shrugged, "Hinata's a good partner. She'll fix what I screw up." He smirked at Naruto, "So...what about you? Why aren't you with the mother of your child?"

"She's all over another man," Naruto muttered dramatically, "So I had to divorce her...such a pity...the baby was so young." Kiba punched his shoulder, "Naw, just kidding, I dunno. We're doing fine I guess. I'm just glad that I didn't get Ino...or Kagame, 'cause she scares me a little."

I couldn't help but snort. Kagame...of all people to be scared of, he's scared of her.

Lauren let out a whiny groan, "You guys are lucky...I'd take pretty boy over the fag—" I shot her a glare, "sorry, Maruka any day."

"I wouldn't trade you." I muttered. As much as I hated to give the pretty boy any credit, at least I know that he would do the work on this project. Maruka would flunk it just to spite me; whereas, Sasuke cared too much about his grade for that.

"Yeah, I know..." She grumbled, pouting. "I just...I don't know anything about babies..." She muttered picking hers up, "I don't know what to feed them, what their cries mean, when to change them, when to lay them down to sleep...nothing!"

I sighed, "I'll help you, Lauren." I had done plenty of baby-sitting for couples with young children or infants, so I had a pretty good idea of what I should do.

"Okay." She seemed a little more hopeful now, but I just hoped, for her sake, that Maruka knew what he was doing.

"Um...hehe..." Naruto scratched his head, "Could you-"

"Yes, I'll help you too." I said. I lived just down the street from Naruto's apartment, so helping him wouldn't be a problem. Poor kid... He'd gone without parents for longer than I did, so when it came to child care, he was going to be hopeless. Sakura would do all she could while she had it, but I would have to help him otherwise.

Naruto did a small fist pumping action, "Yes!"

I rolled my eyes and turned back to Lauren, "Do you get it now?"

"Ask me in a few years." Lauren sulked.

"If you were given a quiz on it, would you pass with a C?" I asked.

"I might...depending on whether he lets us use our notes..." She muttered, a hopeful gleam in her eye.

"I doubt it. It's Iruka-sensei, not Asuma or Kakashi." I reminded her.

"Way to smother the hope..." She grumbled, pursing her lips.

I shrugged, "Just being realistic."

The bell rang, signaling the end of the day. There were a few whoops of joy as students bustled around, getting their bags ready to go home. As I finished packing mine, I had to adjust the way Lauren was holding her baby doll.

"Always support the head." I muttered softly. Lauren nodded gratefully, and Naruto looked to be taking silent notes. Good... He was going to need them...and If I had my way, all three of us were going to pass this. As I threw my bad over my shoulder, Kakashi-sensei called my name.

"Hana," I looked up, "Can I speak to you for a moment?" I nodded, motioning for Lauren and Naruto to go on. Carefully, I lifted the baby doll in my arms—what could I say, I was used to the real thing.

I brushed past an irritable Maruka, barely keeping the doll in my arms. My nostrils flared as I took a deep breath. Not again...not again...not for him... I sauntered up to sensei's desk, "What's up?"

Kakashi-sensei eyed Maruka until he had left the room completely before he spoke, "I've spoken with Lady Tsunade–"

"Yeah, I have detention. So what?" I grumbled. I regretted the words the instant they left my mouth, but I couldn't help it. Teachers—almost every single one of them—had gotten on my nerves today.

"No need to be so cheeky, Hana." He said calmly, "I spoke with Lady Tsunade. I know you have detention, and you should be grateful that your sentence isn't worse."

I raised a brow, "Grateful?" Disbelief colored my irritation.

"She has a soft spot for orphans." He gave me a warning look, "Your sentence wasn't worse because she sympathized with your side. Try to keep that in mind..."

"Right. Wait until after school. Got it." I muttered, recalling Tsunade's advice in her office this morning.

Kakashi cleared his throat to wipe away the chuckle, "Hana...just go."

I smirked, holding my head high as I walked out of his class room. When I stepped out, I was bombarded with questions by Naruto and Lauren. I ignored most of them or answered with nods or shakes of my head, but some of them I gave verbal, one word answers.

"So...you've gotta go to detention..." Naruto muttered solemnly. I nodded, "With Guy-sensei." I nodded again.

"I've never been what's it like?" Lauren muttered. She was right; she always got shoved into Ibiki's detention.

A sly look crept across Naruto's face, "Well, he makes you run fifty laps around the school—"

"Could be worse..." She muttered.

"On your hands!" Naruto smirked when she yelped, "Then he makes you carwheel up the walls, which drains your chakra. Then you have to stay on one leg for fifteen minutes while juggling bowling balls, and you have to start over when you drop one-"

She punched his shoulder, "Not funny!"

I smiled, "He just makes us either power study or do trust exercises..." I answered her question as bluntly as possible. "I have the feeling that I'll be doing the latter."

As we ambled toward the Gymnasium, I stopped at the double doors.

"See ya later?" Lauren muttered.

I nodded, "If they're drunk, go to my house." The smile dropped from Naruto's face.

"If she's not home yet, come to mine." Naruto said. Lauren nodded gratefully to us. She draped her long arms around me, pulling me into a hug. I hugged her back briefly and pounded knuckles with Naruto before turning to the doors.

"See you guys later." I muttered, pushing through the doors.

Maruka was already standing there. His expression and stiff posture was sullen and sulking as a more than jubilant Guy-sensei was standing next to him. He gave me a look of loathing and disdain, allowing it to accent the scrapes and bruises I gave him. I smirked at him, daring him to cuss me out in front of a teacher as I walked forward cockily.

"Ah! Hana, good...Join us." Guy-sensei stood in a superhero-like pose, his hands on his waist in a cocky stance. I groaned. This was going to be fun...not. "Ah! You've gotten the project from Miss Shizune's class. If you don't mind my asking, who's the lucky father?"

I could feel my smirk drop into a grimace, "Uchiha." I grumbled.

"Sasuke? Hmm...a pedigree...How fitting." He muttered in a approval.

"Pretty boys are douche bags... I grumbled.