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I Could Write It Better Than You Ever Felt It


"My kids! Where are my wonderful kids!?"

The woman who was supposed to be my mother was thrilled. She was overcome with emotions as she was now surrounded by all her loved ones. She had just entered her large backyard that we had spent the whole night decorating. I was told that she had been out of town for a few days and that was why we were able to pull off this huge surprise party. As soon as everyone's claps and cheers had died down, right after we all yelled 'surprise', she demanded to know where Pete and I were.

I don't know if Pete has any other siblings in real life. I'm assuming he does. But to my knowledge they were not at the party. No one brought them up. In my story they didn't exist. , just like my real parents. I wondered where they were. It was still hard to wrap my head around everything.

The well dressed, but rather simple looking mom made her way through the crowd towards Pete and I. I didn't even have time to worry about whether she would recognize me or not, because before I knew what was happening she had engulfed me in a huge hug.

"Oh Alice! I've missed you! And Peter!" She let go of me briefly to embrace Pete. I sighed a quick sigh of relief. Once again, I had written her dialog. I knew roughly what she was going to say throughout this night. This would be easy. Hopefully.

I looked up at Jack. He was next.

"And Jack! Why I haven't seen you since Alice's graduation!" She let go of Pete and went to Jack with open arms. I had no idea if this is how Pete's mom really acted, but apparently I had written her to be very friendly.

I so badly missed my real mom. She was one of my best friends. In fact, I was starting to miss everyone. My friends, my co-workers, my dog...


I was pulled out of my thoughts by a familiar voice. It rang through my ears like music. I turned my head to see Becki.

"Oh!" I exclaimed before running over to give her a hug. I knew she wouldn't remember the real me, but just to see someone from my old life was enough to get me through this party.

"How are you?!" I asked. I felt myself start to act like the real me and I was hoping no one would notice too much of a change. Being Alice Wentz I felt much more reserved; planning and thinking every move before hand so as not to give away my real identity.

"I'm good! It's so good to see you!"

Becki looked slightly different as well. She had long black hair instead of her usual shoulder length blonde. It didn't really surprise me too much. Nothing really surprised me anymore.

Jack soon joined our small group and things actually started getting fun. I found myself getting less nervous and paranoid as the night went on. Pretty soon, alcohol was brought into the picture and that just made everything even better.

A few drinks later and Jack and I were dancing to 80's pop music, making fools out of ourselves.

"I miss Alex!" I blurted out. Jack grinned and nodded his head.

"Me too! Let's face-time him."

This sounded like the greatest idea in the world to me at the time, and we both ran excitedly to a more secluded area underneath the large party tent that was set up in the yard.

"Becki!! Come talk to Alex with us!" She laughed at Jack and I before joining us. Jack set up his phone and we all waited patiently for the video call to start.

"What are you punks doing!?" Alex laughed into his phone. We all tried to fit our faces together on the small screen of Jacks phone.

"Partying! We miss you!" Jack made a fake sad face while Becki pretended to cry. I, on the other hand, could not stop smiling.

"And how are you, smiley?" Alex grinned. My smile grew wider.

"I'm good! I'm a little buzzed right now..." I laughed.

"A little?!" Jack asked. Everyone laughed.

"You guys are crazy. Is your mom having fun?"

"She's having a blast!"

We said a few more random things until Pete called us all back over to where the party was. We said our goodbyes to Alex and the three of us headed over to Pete.

"Mom wants group pictures."

Again, the alcohol made this sound way more exciting than it actually was. I can't tell you how many group photos I was in that night. I don't even know if half of those people knew who I was.

"Ok now just one of you and Jack!"

Jack smiled and threw his arm around me. I did the same and we posed for a few seconds, grinning cheerily into my moms camera.

"Your mom thinks we're dating." He mumbled to me through his grin.

"What??" I mumbled back.

"Mhm. She asked me how long we've been dating."

"And what did you say?!"

"6 months."

"All done!" My mom called out to us. We pulled away and I stared at Jack.

"What?!?" I exclaimed.
He laughed.

"I'm just kidding! But she did ask. I told her we weren't. She said she hopes that changes soon." He smirked. I rolled my eyes.

"Mothers..." I sighed. How awkward.

"You know, I can't help but say this to you Alice, but I hope it changes soon too..."

A part of me felt butterflies start to form in the pit of my stomach. It felt good. It was exciting and fun. But I had to keep reminding myself that these were my words, not Jacks. It was so hard. Especially when he wore such a sad look on his face. I opened my arms to hug him and he accepted.

"I just need some time, Jack."

I know it was a lousy response, but it was all I could come up with. I wondered how much longer this all would go on. Eventually, I would probably fully become Alice Wentz. I could feel the changes already start to happen. I was drinking more, thinking about Jack more, acting more wildly than usual. Thinking about how I was actually slowly transforming into another person was starting to make me nervous again, so I decided to be alone and get some fresh air for a few minutes. I excused myself from Jack and I took a short walk around the house to the front yard. I sat down on the dark and empty porch and took my cell phone out of my pocket. Alex had texted me.

"I don't want to sound creepy or anything, but it was really good to see you earlier on that video call. I can't believe I miss having you around as much as I do. I'm so glad you're having a good time. Talk to you soon."

The butterflies were back, but there were more of them. I could feel tears actually start to form in my eyes. This was all too much for me. Alex was trying to be a great friend, and it was making me feel all weird and happy inside. Not good. And what about Jack? I began to panic.

"I need to get out of this mess." I said out loud to myself. I couldn't go back on that bus. I couldn't be near Alex anymore. I shouldn't be near Jack either. I was beginning to freak out. I heard footsteps coming near me.

"Hi Jack." I sighed.

"Hey...I'm really sorry I said that. I shouldn't say things like that, it makes it really awkward. I just wanted to say I'm sorry and I think we should go back to the party and dance around like idiots again."

I stayed quite for a few minutes, thinking hard about Jacks words. And then I thought about Alex's words; 'I'm so glad you're having a good time.'

"You're right. Let's go."

I hopped up from my seat on the porch and we ran back to the party. I think a part of me needed to loosen up and live like Alice Wentz. I don't think she would let the situation I was in stop her from having a good time. So that's exactly what I did.
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