I Could Write It Better Than You Ever Felt It

Everyone knew me.

Everyone in Fall Out Boy, all the roadies, various tour people, everyone. They all knew me.
Jack and I had walked past a few fans at the venue, and even they knew me.

It was becoming easier to keep up my charade.

Most of us were on Fall Out Boys bus. Tomorrow was a day off, and everyone was celebrating the tour so far with drinks and whatnot.

I was squished on a small couch in-between Jack and Pete.

"But Alllllllllllex..." Jack whined into his phone. Alex was aware that I was here, and that was the very reason he refused to come.

Trying not to eavesdrop on Jack, I focused my attention to the others.

"Dude, do a shot of this with me."

"Ew, no way."

"C'mon!"

"Alice will."

Pete smirked at me. I let out a nervous laugh.

In my story I was an avid partier. That's why Jack and I were such good friends. We were willing to do almost anything for a laugh or good time. We drank our way through every weekend of high school.

Unfortunately, the real life Alice was a bit more bland.
Think Sandra Dee from Grease; "I had some champagne at my cousins wedding once."

Oh Hell, This should be interesting.

"Well, it's offical, Alex is a douschebag." Jack told us as he hung up his phone.

"He's been so weird lately!" Rian added.

"Alice! Shots?!" Zack brought the subject back. I shrugged.

"Yeah sure." I said, pretending it was no big deal.

"I want one!" Jack added.

"You guys are nuts, have you ever had this shit?"

I was handed a shot glass filled to the brim with a darker liquid. No one told me what it was, but I figured I might as well just take one for the team. One shot won't hurt. There was a countdown to three and then cheering as we threw our heads back and let the alcohol pour down our throats. One was definitely enough for me. I began coughing up a storm due to how strong it was.

==========

As many stories go, somehow one shot turned into six, along with a couple beers. In my defense, these people had expectations of me that I had to live up to. And hey-everyone else was doing it!

It was about 3am when we stopped for gas. We probably didn't need to stop so soon, but Jack had been going on and on about wanting a microwave burrito for the past hour. I'm assuming the stop was mostly to shut him up.

A few people were still casually drinking and talking and there was a movie on. Everything seemed very chill.

I, on the other hand, must have been a complete mess. I remember talking to everyone as if I really had know them for years; Typical embarrassing drunk actions. I was telling Pete stories about him when he was little, even though I had no idea what he was like as a child. I was telling Patrick he had the voice of an angel. I was reminiscing about high school with the All Time Low boys.

Now that things were begining to settle down, I was starting to feel extremely ill.

"Jack..." I mumbled to, as the bus pulled into a parking lot.

"Hmm?"

"I'm sick..." Jack only laughed. The room started to spin.

"You didn't even drink that much!"

My God. How much of a party animal had I wrote myself to be?! I felt like I was dying and no one else here seemed concerned. Apparently this was nothing compared to my usual nights out. What a big mess I've created for myself.

As the bus stopped, Jack ran off of it without hesitation. I followed, but stayed farther behind. My vision was getting fuzzy. My drunken mind had somehow come to the conclusion that I had to find Alex. I began to wander around the busses in the lot.

What seemed like decades later, I finally stumbled back onto All Time Low's bus. Luckily for me, Alex was still awake. He was sitting in-front of a laptop in the booth.

Upon seeing him, I tripped on the last step going up into the bus, and landed on the ground. Alex looked up from his laptop and stared at me.

"Alex...I need....To tell you..." I stayed on the ground, and curled into a ball.

"What the hell?" He asked, as he got up and came to my side.

"I'm dying. No one believes me but I'm dying." I must have slurred it.

"What happened??" He was growing more concerned.

"I drank...so much. I never drank before. I'm dying. No one will help." Tears were starting to form in my eyes. I heard him chuckle.

"You're not dying. You're very drunk." He sat on the ground next to me.

"Imreallydyingdsajd"

"What?"

"Help." More laughter.

"Guess the Alice they all know is a bit more crazier than the real deal, huh?"

"No more fan-fiction." I said in almost a whisper. Alex grinned.

"C'mon, let me help you stand up."

"I'm sorry." I blurted out.

"For what?" Alex seemed confused.

"For writing this whole thing and ruining your life."

"You didn't ru-"

"You hate me so much. You wish I was gone so bad. You cringe at the sight of me." I said dramatically. A look of guilt took over Alex's face. He was silent for a minute.

"I don't hate you Alice. I just don't know you."

I don't remember responding. I don't remember anything from that point on.