Blue and Yellow

The next morning when I woke up and went to go to the bathroom there was a sticky note on my door. It said I had a small package at the front desk. That was odd. I dont know what the hell it could be. So I walked to go see Joyce and see about this mix up. Since thats obviously what it had to be. When I got to the desk I saw Joyce look up and smile at me.

"Here ya go sweetie," she said as she handed over a package that had been wrapped in Sunday comics from the newspaper.

"So you know who it's from?" I asked as I held the package.

"The deliverer said that if you opened it it would explain everything," Joyce said, smiling softly before answering the phone as it rang.

"Kay thanks," I said as I walked back to my room with my package.

Joyce simply smiled and waved at me as I left.

Back in my room I sat down on my bed and placed the package in my lap and looked at it. It was rectangular, and slightly hefty, but I had no idea what the hell it was. So using my good hand I started ripping it open. It was a white box. How perplexing.

Opening up the what I now recognized as a sweater of shirt box from a department store I was met with black tissue paper and a yellow sticky note. Picking it up I read it out loud. Why? I was hoping it would help me figure out what the hell it was and who from.

"Here, I figured it was the least I could do. I still hope to see you Friday night. Bert," I read and smiled a little.

Opening the still mystery package I laughed a little when I saw what rested under the black tissue paper. Notebooks. Like six of them, all black just like mine that sadly enough really was falling apart and I had long since filled and really was just writing in any available space.

"Thank you Bert McCracken, for this and everything you have done for me without knowing it," I said out loud as I ran my fingers down the outside of one of the notebooks.

-xXx-

Friday came quicker than I would have liked. I managed to squeak in one stop at the cafe, with a new notebook in hand. Krissy eyed it when I walked in.

"New notebook?" she asked as she got my coffee and my pastry surprise.

"Yeah, my friend who I was with the other day got it for me as a surprise," I said as I took my things from her.

"Cool," she said as she smiled and went back to work.

I started to walk back to my seat when I stopped, and then turned to face Krissy. She was looking at me with a giant smile on her face.

"Sometimes it's good to break a few routine habits," she simply said then went back to her annoyed looking customer.

I hadn't placed my order like I always did. Huh. Maybe breaking some routine habits is a good thing.

Later after I left the cafe I ran back to the Haven, chain smoking like a bandit since I was nervous. I had to get ready for tonight. I was going to go see Bert McCracken, and The Used, play a concert. I was going to see a concert! Id never been to one. My boyfriends had never let me. Ever. And not only was I going to go see them play, but I had been invited by Bert McCracken himself. But the hardest part was that I needed to get ready and not make it seem like I knew what was going on. This was going to suck.

I took a shower after un-bandaging my wrist and then re-bandaging it after my skin had completely dried. Then I dug through my clothes. Which since everything I owned fit into one medium sized duffle bag really wasnt all that hard to do. I threw my vintage Van Halen t-shirt onto my bed after about fifteen minutes of debate. Then I followed it up with pair of extremely tight black jeans and my gray fingerless gloves. I threw my hoodie on top of the pile and went in search of my white converse, figuring that for tonight I could go through the pain of trying to tie them.

Clothes done I went to my hair next. I looked at it in the mirror and tried to figure out what the hell to do with it. It was shoulder length, well maybe a little longer than that but not by much, and a light blonde color. Not anything platinum or anything but a very light blonde none the less. And on the underneath of my hair I had died it a shockingly bright red color. I dont know why Devin allowed me to do it, much less keep it, but he did and I was grateful. It was like who I was outside my atrocious boyfriends.

I simply ran my brush through it and then stuck some moose in it to work with. I straightened my hair with my fingers, flattening it out in sections as I curled them back a bit from my face. When I was done with the long lengthy process, since I was still basically one handed, I admired my work in the small mirror.

"Not bad, it'll have to do," I said to my reflection before going towards my makeup.

I did my thick black eyeliner as normal, well maybe a added a bit more, but I was trying to make myself believe that I didnt. Next I added a bit of red eye shadow to the corners of my eyes and called myself done. Slapping on some deodorant I went about painting my nails black with the nail polish I had bummed from one of the teenagers here that had taken a liking to me. It felt so weird, I felt like I was a teenager again. Or at least like twenty or twenty one again, and I kind of liked it. It made me smile as I screwed on the top back on, made me feel like myself was winning this fight for dominance on my life. I slowly put on my studded belt and then my wallet chain that didnt really attach to a wallet anymore.

Everything done I checked myself in the mirror one last time. Everything looking to be in order I slipped on my hoodie and then my gray fingerless gloves. I kind of hated only having a few articles of clothing to ever choose from but again it made things easier. I added a thin scarf around my neck that I twisted and loosely tied once. It was warm in Utah for the most part but it was just for looks.

I grabbed my bag and made my way out towards the exit till I realized that I was going to be out passed ten and that the doors to the Haven were going to be closed. Fuck. I was just going to have to tell Bert that I had to leave and be back before ten. He would understand hopefully since he now knew where I was living.

I lit a cigarette and made my way towards the Grand Theater and pulled my hoodie a bit tighter around me. The temperature had dropped severely since the sun had dropped, but I still enjoyed it. I liked fall. and winter. I liked the cold. But it still sent a shiver through my body as I smoked my cigarette and made my way to my very first concert.

After a short walk I finally came to the grand theater. I saw the mass of kids waiting for the show, even though it was a tiny venue the kids still packed in like sardines. I suddenly felt old. These kids were like fourteen and up, stopping way before they reached twenty four. I felt really old, but then realized that Bert was older than me so it wasnt too much of a problem.

After that worry came my next one hit me, I didn't have a ticket and I didn't know how to go about getting one even though he said he would have one set aside for me. I stood around shuffling my feet for a bit as I lit another cigarette and finally I decided to ask some kid where the ticket window was.

"Hey, do you know where the ticket window is or where we get our reserved tickets?" I asked some kid who had hair that put my red to shame.

His head literally looked like it was on fire with all the variegated warm bright colors died in it. It looked professional. And I wanted it. Badly.

I thought he was going to give me a smart ass remark but instead he smiled at me.

"Ticket window with will call tickets is up at the very front of the building. It looks like one of those old fashion ticket booths," he said with a smile as he pointed me in the right direction.

"Thanks," I said as I turned in the correct direction.

"No problem," the kid said before going back to whatever it was he was doing before hand.

Gingerly I made way up to the ticket window, dodging and swerving around the anxious bodies of die hard fans. And just like the kid with the hair like fire said there it was, and it indeed did look like an old fashioned ticket booth. Slowly I approached it, but not before taking one last drag and flicking my finished cigarette off into the distance, not near any kids.

"Hi, this is going to sound weird but I have tickets on reserve," I said to the woman behind the glass.