Waiting Inside

The brown box felt too heavy in my arms. My arms gently trembled from the weight. It held the last of my belongings and the start of a new beginning. The side walk seemed to go on forever as I attempted to reach our vehicle. With sympathetic eyes, my father took the box and placed it in the back of the SUV. I flexed my fingers quietly as he tied it down. My eyes drifted to the vehicle itself. My older sister was already inside, her face was buried in her iPhone.

My eyes then drifted to my house, or well my home. I've been living there for about four years, that's a very long time for a eighteen year old girl. I wanted to run inside and cry. Even though the house was pretty run-down it always gave me comfort. This new house my father says will be bigger and so much more prettier. It's an vintage mansion he said, able to afford it with years of savings. He wouldn't let us see it until we actually moved in. He knew I would throw a fit.

I heard my father's feet in the gravel as he walked up behind me. He placed his hand on my shoulder and gently squeezed. "It will be fine, Em. You will be much happier in the south. Plus it's on the coast. You love the beach." My father attempted to cheer me up but I just frowned more.

"That was before the accident," I whispered. I immediately regretted bringing up the accident. It had been two years and my father was still trying to process my mother wasn't coming home. Feeling guilty I stepped into the car and sat down. Amanda turned her head from the front seat and her blue eyes glared at me.

"Nice going," she commented. I mouth the words 'shut the hell up' back at her. Amanda rolled her eyes and returned to her phone. I attempted to listen to music. My father, after making sure everything was secure, got into the car so we could leave. The moving van idled on the street then my uncle lightly tapped the horn.

My father sighed. "Well girls, this is our new start. I know we should have done this years ago but it's better late than never."

I still frowned from the back seat. He could have waited one more year until I graduated, but nope. It felt like he waited for Amanda to graduate from high school and college before he made us move. It was going to be my senior year. Instead of letting me graduate with friends I grew up with, he's making me go to another school. In a way I contemplated the idea of just moving out, maybe staying with my friend or something. I would never to that to him, or Amanda. It would break their hearts. So I'm stuck.

My father started the car and we pulled out of our drive way. The last home my mother was in and the one where I started high school in was finally gone. All those memories I had there would be lost forever. Tears swelled in my eyes so I buried my face into the box that sat next to me. Amanda always made fun of my crying face, so I always hid when I cried.

It was going to be hard to leave everything behind. I had over came worse situations, so I would be okay eventually. The sound of the radio and the clicks from Amanda's iPhone helped me doze off. Sleeping was much better than waiting six hours until we reached the coast. I felt my father touch my knee as I dozed away.

"Go ahead, baby girl. I'll wake you when we stop in Houston for food," he told me. I nodded and curled up more. In just a few hours I would be in a new reality, a new place and even a new start. I could be anyone I wanted. The old Emily was dead, this Emily could thrive. Maybe it's a good thing we are leaving. Or it could be my worst nightmare.