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Lily’s POV

I saw Zak’s car parked outside when I got home, so I assumed he’d let himself into the apartment complex. I’d cut him a key to the building the other day. I probably wasn’t allowed to do that since he technically didn’t live there but I figured since he was over so much he may as well have his own key. When I opened the door to my room the entire apartment was quiet, though. I knew Av was with Matt, so I took off my shoes and snuck down the hallway to my bedroom. I had a feeling I knew where Zak was hiding.

I’d been right, of course. He was passed out on his side on my bed making soft sleeping sounds. I bit my lip in a smile. He was so gosh darn cute…and shirtless. It was a nice sight to come home to, especially since I usually came home to no one—apart from the occasional babysitter and my daughter. However, call me cruel but I wanted him awake. So I quickly changed from my work clothes into one of Zak’s long-sleeved shirts that was in my dresser. I liked wearing his clothes; they were comfortable. Once I was changed I crawled into bed beside him and kissed his exposed throat. Slowly his eyes blinked open and he found me. He smiled softly.

“Hey,” I adored his sleepy voice.

“Hi,” I responded.

“Mm, what time is it?” He sat up a little.

“2 pm,” I said.

“How was work?”

“Tiring,” I yawned and cuddled up against his warm side. He put an arm securely around me.

“Well I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” I purred. I was in my happy place again. “What did you do all day?”

“I paid rent with Nick and Aaron, ran a few errands, picked up something for dinner, cleaned up the kitchen for you and somehow I ended up falling asleep.” He smiled boyishly.

“I thought I smelled citrus when I walked through the door,” I chuckled and kissed his cheek. “Thank you. So what did you dream about when you fell asleep?”

“I dreamt I was lying here and I heard a noise so I peeked through my eyelashes and found an unbelievably hot girl changing into my shirt at the foot of the bed.” He smirked at me.

“You little shit,” I playfully smacked his chest. “There’s no peeking.”

“I can’t help it. You’re a weakness of mine.” He stretched out, extending his arms above him until there was a pop and he sighed in contentment.

“You’re such a cheese sometimes.” I scoffed, rolling over on my side so my back was to him.

I felt his strong arms wrap around me and his lips pressed to the nape of my neck. “And you’re the ham to my cheese,” he said.

I laughed. “Oh my god, Zak! You’re proving my point.”

“Hey!” he exclaimed. “You wanna make a sandwich? A ham and cheese sandwich?” He kissed my neck three times.

“You maniac,” I turned around and gave him a peck. “I don’t have time to make a sandwich with you. I have to go get Avaya in an hour.”

“That’s plenty of time!” He pouted. “I’m really craving a sandwich, Lily, I’m telling you.”

I rolled my eyes. “Inappropriate,”

“You’re inappropriate,” he retorted, flopping back onto his pillow. “This is the most appropriate time in the world for a sandwich and you’re wasting it.”

“Oh, don’t pout,” I laughed. “I’ll just have to owe you later for cleaning the kitchen and picking up dinner, that’s all.”

“Now is later!” he whined.

“No, now is now,” I chuckled, “as in present moment. Later would be tonight.”

“God you’re so picky,” he grumbled.

“And you’re a child,” I smirked, smacking his back.

He flipped over and raised his eyebrows at me. “Is this our first argument right now?” he asked. “Is our first argument about when we’re going to have sex?”

“I’d say it’s a pretty good argument,” I muttered.

“Well we wouldn’t be able to do it now anyway, we’ve wasted too much time bickering about it,” He sighed dramatically and got up on his knees. “But I do want my shirt back, thief!”

He grabbed my sides and started to pull up on his shirt. I kicked and writhed and giggled, holding it down.

“No, no!” I laughed. “No, you have more in the dresser! No, Zak, stop it!”

“You’re a thief!” he accused in between laughs. “Give it back!”

“Zachary Alexander Bagans, you stop it right now!” My speech was broken by bubbly laughter but I managed to get the words out somehow.

“Oh, are we using full names now, Lillian June Manning?” He raised an eyebrow and smirked.

“You shit,”

I pushed him away and hopped off the bed to throw one of his shirts at him from the dresser. I pulled on a pair of comfy yoga pants while I was over there. He just sat on the bed laughing at me for awhile until I put my hands on my hips. Only then did he finally get up and pull the shirt over his head. He walked over and kissed my head.

“You will make a sandwich with me,” he whispered, “sometime soon.”

“Don’t hold your breath,” I tapped his lips with my finger and turned away from him so I could pull a brush through my long hair.

He stood beside me and played with his own hair, touching up parts that had been flattened down by his nap. I tried to bite back a giggle.

“So am I coming with you to pick up Av? Is that the plan?” he asked.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” I bit my lip. Every time Zak came with me I could feel the alpha male tension rippling the air between him and Matt. It was almost unbearable.

“Of course I want to,” he answered. There was something in his voice when he said those words. It was darker; laced with intent. He’d come just to see if Matt would do anything.

“Well alright then,” I said.

“Can we stop by my place on the way home though? I have to grab my phone charger.”

“Yeah, sure,” I nodded. “Will Aaron and Nick want to come for dinner?”

“Aaron’s working late and Nick’s on a date with Veronique,” he said idly, staring at his dead phone.

“Oh. Oh well, the less dishes I have to do the better.”

“That is very true,”

I shuffled out into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of raspberry lemonade from the fridge. I leaned against the counter and drank it slowly. I was feeling the same anxious feeling as I always did when Avaya was with Matt. I would never be comfortable knowing she was with him. I thought about the other day when Zak was worrying about her calling him dad. A thrill of panic spiked my blood for an instant as I thought about it. I knew Avaya wouldn’t call Zak dad in front of Matt; I’d talked to her about it just to pacify Zak, but I knew she wouldn’t anyway. Still, there was always that what-if that haunted me.

Zak made his way into the kitchen and smiled at me. I smiled back but I knew he could sense my discomfort. He always knew, but it was pretty obvious to anyone I think. I’d been getting better with my anxiety since I’d met him but it was something that would always be there.

I watched him as he dug in my fridge for an apple and proceeded to peel the sticker off and wash it. I folded one arm across my body and watched him rub it under the stream of water from the sink. It was a small, simple task that everyone did, but I just liked watching him do stuff like that. His brow would crinkle slightly as he concentrated for that one second, and sometimes his tongue would flick across his lips very quickly. I just liked watching him do things. I liked him. No, it was more than that. We’d already established it.

He dried his apple on the tea towel and walked over to me, taking a loud, crunchy bite out of it. Juice trickled down his chin and a droplet hit my arm. He chuckled and wiped it away with his thumb.

“Sorry. These things are dangerous, y’know.”

“I love you.”

He stopped chewing his bite of apple and stared at me for a moment. He looked puzzled, but I just stared right back without batting an eyelash. Yeah, it was a weird time to say it, but I was feeling it. Just watching him do menial things like that and projectile apple juice onto my arm made me feel this intense love and appreciation for that man. It’s hard to explain. He might be weird, he might make bad jokes sometimes, he might wear weird clothes and spend too much time on his hair but he was mine, and I was in love with every quirky little thing about him.

“That was unexpected,” he said softly after swallowing.

I chuckled. “You were unexpected,” I said. “But I still love you. And you know, I’m getting kind of used to saying those words again. I feel like they actually mean something this time.”

He grinned and reached his hand out towards my face. I felt his fingers as they brushed my cheek, pushing a stray curl behind my ear. I blushed at the simple contact.

“I’m so happy about that,” he whispered. “I love you too. Those words will always mean something for me.”

I grasped his arm, which was still outstretched as his hand cupped my cheek, and I leaned into his touch. I never would’ve thought it’d come to this moment all those months ago when I met him in the library.

He leaned in and kissed my nose before looking at the clock. “We should get going, Lily.”

I nodded. “Yeah, let’s go.”

We got into my vehicle and started to drive to Matt’s place. Zak grabbed one of my hands and squeezed it as I drove. My anxiety definitely didn’t go away when I was driving to my ex’s house, but Zak made it easier to deal with. When the familiar white house crept up into my line of vision I heaved a sigh of dread. The clouds over Vegas were beginning to darken slightly. It’s like they knew what was coming.

I parked in the driveway and as always I took a moment before digging out my phone and phoning Matt to come outside. Zak stood rigid by my side, listening to our short phone conversation.

“Hello?” Matt answered.

“It’s me. I’m outside.” I said coldly.

“’Kay. Is Zak with you?” I didn’t like the annoyed tone he associated with Zak’s name. It’s not like Zak had done anything directly to Matt—not yet, anyway.

“Yes.” I growled defensively.

“Mm.” He hung up.

I rolled my eyes and dropped my phone back into the cup holder. “Fuckin’ child…” I muttered in contempt.

Zak squeezed my shoulder carefully but didn’t say anything. He knew by now there wasn’t much he could say.

Finally Matt walked out of his house with Avaya walking unharmed by his side. I breathed a sigh of relief and got out. Zak followed me, quickly standing by my side in front of the vehicle.

“Mommy!” Avaya raced towards me, hugging my legs. I cupped her head in my hand and smiled.

“Hi, kiddo,” I murmured.

Matt shoved his hands in his jeans pockets, watching the three of us with cold eyes.

Avaya looked up at me and grinned and then turned her head to face Zak. Her brown eyes lit up and she ran over to hug him, too.

“Daddy Zak!” she exclaimed.

A cold sensation slipped down my spine like slowly melting ice. My eyes got wide and I stared at Avaya, who was still hugging Zak’s legs unassumingly. I don’t even think she realized what she just said.

Zak’s blue eyes were on me, wide with disbelief. I met them for a moment and watched as they narrowed before turning to face Matt. I was nearly frozen in apprehension as I looked at him as well. Matt’s face was a mask of pure anger. His chest rose and fell beneath his navy blue shirt in timed, careful breaths.

“What did my daughter just call you…?” he asked, eerily quiet.

Instinctively I grabbed Avaya and picked her up in my arms. She was confused by the sudden disruption in her hug but I held her closely to my chest.

“Get in the car,” Zak said to me from under his breath.

I stared at him in shock. “Zak—” This wasn’t his battle.

“Lily, get in the car.” His tone suggested no argument.

“C’mon, Avaya,” I hauled her to the vehicle and put her in her car seat. She kept asking what was happening but I was keeping an ear out for whatever Zak and Matt were saying and all I could say to Avaya was “It’s okay, Av, it’s okay.”

I shut Avaya’s door and crept around to the driver’s door but I didn’t get inside. I kept listening to their voices, low and dark a few feet away.

“You’re not her father, I am,” Matt was warning Zak. “Did you teach her to call you that or did Lily teach her?”

“Neither of us taught her,” Zak answered. “She decided to call me that herself. That says a lot about you, doesn’t it?”

“Shut your fucking mouth—”

“No, I won’t. This is my family now and I’m not going to let you hurt them anymore.”

“Your family? Last I checked that’s my daughter and my ex is her mother—”

“Yes, your ex, as in she’s not yours anymore. You’re a piece of shit that should’ve been thrown in jail a long time ago and now that I’m in the picture that’s exactly what’s going to happen to you.”

“What did you just say to me? Who the fuck do you think you are? I’d like to see you try one damn thing—”

“Zak,” My voice was hoarse. Both men turned to look at me. “C-can we go?”

“Yes,” Zak answered, much to my relief. He turned to give Matt one final glare before getting into the car. I hastily reversed before Matt could attack and we were off.

“D-do you still want to go to your place?” I whispered. I could feel Zak’s tension radiating off of him and it scared me. Because as much as I knew Zak would never lay a hand on me, it reminded me of when Matt would get angry and I could sense a beating coming before it happened. It was the flashbacks that were getting to me.

“Yes,” Zak answered simply.

“Mommy?” Avaya piped up quietly from the backseat.

I swallowed a lump. “Yes, sweetie?”

“Am I in trouble?”

I furrowed my brow. “Why would you be in trouble?”

“Because I made daddy and Zak mad at each other,” she whimpered. “I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s not your fault, Av,” Zak turned around to speak to her. “This was bound to happen. Your dad and I just aren’t meant to be friends.”

I looked in my rear view mirror to see Avaya nod and look down. I suddenly wanted to murder Matt. Not only could he make me feel terrified around my own boyfriend, but he was responsible for making my daughter feel terrible, too. He was truly a vile person. I made the decision then to never let him see our daughter again, no matter how many court appearances I had to make.

We got to Zak’s place and Avaya had to use the bathroom so we all came inside. I paced in the empty living room as Zak grabbed his charger and Avaya used the bathroom. I was feeling incredibly uneasy after Matt and Zak’s confrontation. Just when my life was starting to feel right again something like this had to happen. I didn’t blame Avaya for it, I really didn’t, but I just wasn’t ready for this to happen yet. I wasn’t ready to witness it.

Zak came out from his room with his charger wrapped around his fist. Avaya came out a few minutes later and hopped up on the couch, peering out through the blinds on the window.

“I’m sorry,” Zak said quietly. “I had to stand my ground. I’m not about to let a piece of shit like that walk all over me, you, or Av.”

“I know,” I whispered. “You did what you had to do. It’s okay.”

He lightly touched my chin with his knuckle, tipping my face up so he could look at my eyes. His blue eyes were much softer than they had been and he smiled at me.

Suddenly Avaya piped up from the couch. “Mommy! Daddy’s truck is outside.”

Zak and I both froze for an instant before racing to the window and looking out to see what Avaya was talking about. Just like she’d said, Matt’s rusty truck was parked out front of Zak’s house. I saw his dusty blonde hair as he got out and slammed his door shut.

I grabbed Avaya in my arms on the couch and Zak sat and grabbed us both, holding us to him. And then I just sat, frozen, waiting for the knocks on the door to come.