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Zak’s P.O.V.

“You’re more blind than I am, and I’m pretty blind!”

“Oh hush. At least my glasses are fashionable.”

I chuckled and handed Lily’s ‘fashionable’ glasses back to her in exchange for mine. It was another day spent with her and honestly, I was loving it. We were passed being hostile and shy towards one another. We’d progressed into a simple friendship. I wanted so much more with her, but it was going to take time for us to get there. She’d been through a lot of shit, and she still made me nervous, so we still had a lot to sift through. I was willing to wait, though.

Lily fixed her glasses on the bridge of her nose and pushed her bangs behind her ear again. She did that a lot. She also sassed me a lot. But I didn’t mind one bit.

She kept fidgeting and pacing the small living room. She was a little nervous because Avaya was with her dad and that seemed to put a lot of stress on Lily. I guess I can see why. The scumbag leaves her 3 months after she’s had his baby and then suddenly wants everything to do with the child once all the difficult shit is out of the way. I can’t blame her for not liking it when he had their daughter.

“Lily, it’s gonna be okay,” I murmured as she started pacing again. “Nothing’s happened yet, and you’ve been trading off for awhile, haven’t you?”

“Yeah, yeah, we have,” she sighed. “I just…it’s really hard, that’s all. I keep thinking something might be going wrong or maybe Avaya wants to come home now or, or…”

“It’s fine, Lily, everything’s fine. It’s almost time to go pick her up anyways.” I tried my best to console her; I hope I was doing a good job.

“Right, yeah, you’re right.” She paused for a minute and looked at me. “Do you want to come get her with me?”

I paused and stared at her like I didn’t hear her right the first time. I wasn’t sure I did. Avaya was Lily’s whole world. I kind of felt like she was inviting me to take part in that world. Asking me to come pick up her daughter with her really shouldn’t mean as much as it does, but it felt like I pretty big moment to me.

“Zak?” she asked again when I hadn’t answered.

“Y-yeah, of course I’ll come with you,” I stood up from the couch and stuck my hands in my pants pockets.

She was organizing books and magazines that she kept in a wicker basket by the chair even though they were already in order. I didn’t like to see her stressing out so much. I walked over to her and lightly touched her lower back. She froze instantly, her body going rigid at my touch. I pulled my hand away and looked down at the floor. I needed to keep reminding myself not to push it.

“Sorry,” I whispered clumsily. Fuck, why’d I have to touch her?

“That’s okay,” she muttered back, setting the magazines and books down. “I just…I have problems.”

“We all do.” I half laughed. We’d established that we were both pretty messed up in our own ways.

She started to fidget with her hair some more. I wanted to hold her because it was the only way I really knew how to comfort someone, but she didn’t like it when I touched her. So I kind of just stood there and watched her anxiety rise, and I felt really fucking useless.

“Are you sure you want to come?” she sighed. “Matt can be really confrontational…I don’t want you getting involved in this stuff when you don’t need to be.”

I stood my ground. “I’m coming with you, Lily. I don’t care what he says to me if he says anything at all. You want me there, so I’ll be there.”

She smiled softly at me. It was genuine. “Thank you, Zak.”

“No problem,” I fidgeted with my watch. “Should we get going?”

“Yeah, yeah let’s go,” She immediately rushed to grab her car keys, purse and jacket.

I followed her down to her apartment’s garage and we clambered into a silver SUV that was surprisingly clean inside and out. The sun hurt my eyes as we crawled out of the garage and departed onto the streets so I put my sunglasses on for protection. Lily kept tapping her fingers on the wheel at every stoplight and once again I resisted the urge to put my hand on her knee. It all really got me wondering. What had this Matt guy really done to her to get this reaction out of her? Leaving her with a 3 month old baby surely would make her more angry than anxious. But I could feel the tension radiating off of her as I sat in the passenger seat. A hot flame of anger licked up my spine but I shook my head. Meeting this guy with bad intentions probably wouldn’t turn out well for anyone.

She pulled into the driveway of a modest white house with a one car garage. I unclipped my seatbelt but turned to look at her, as she was showing no signs of leaving the vehicle yet.

“Are we going inside?” I asked.

“No, I’m calling him. He brings her out to me. I don’t like going inside that house.” She said quietly, holding her phone up to her ear.

I kept my mouth shut. I wanted to demand to know what he did to her. Clearly it was far worse than she was letting on and I didn’t like it at all. But I didn’t think we were at a stable place in the relationship for that to happen just yet.

“I’m here,” she said crisply into her phone. There was no hello. Her voice was ice cold and nearly a whisper.

She set her phone in her car’s console and tapped her knee continuously, staring at the door to the house. I watched her as she watched the house. I didn’t like the situation already. Lily was a mess, unravelling right before my eyes.

Finally the screen door flew open and she opened her car door. I followed suit but walked right beside her instead of in front of or behind her. I wanted to be right there in case anything happened.

A burly guy came out of the house with Avaya looking incredibly tiny in his arms. He had short, spiky blonde hair and sharp blue eyes. When he saw me he stared me down and although he couldn’t see my eyes for my sunglasses, I stared right back at him.

Avaya wriggled in his grasp and he set her down. She ran into Lily’s arms, throwing her arms around her mother.

“Mommy!” she said happily.

“Hey, baby,” Lily said, hugging her daughter tightly.

To my surprise and apparently to Matt’s dislike, Avaya squealed my name and ran over to hug me. I had to bend down to return the favour.

“Hey, sweetheart,” I said. She clung to my leg after I stood up and I kept one protective hand on her head. I never thought I’d get so defensive over a child that wasn’t even mine.

“Everything went okay?” Lily asked in that same cold tone.

“Fine,” Matt muttered. He nodded his head in my direction. “Who’s that?”

Lily visibly blushed and looked down. “This is Zak, my friend. I met him a couple days ago at the library.”

“Just met a couple days ago,” Matt muttered, “cute.”

Since he was making no moves to really greet me, I decided to bite my tongue and take the high road. I extended my hand to him.

“Nice to meet you,” I lied.

“Mm.” He grasped my hand tightly and gave it one hard jerk that would’ve ripped my arm from its socket if I hadn’t been prepared for it. He wasn’t going to be playing any games with me.

“We should get going,” Lily said quietly. She could sense the tension flickering like lightning between Matt and I. She picked Avaya up, who waved at Matt.

“Bye, bye, Av,” Matt said.

“Bye, daddy!”

Matt left to go back in his house (a smart decision on his part) and Lily opened the back door of the car to put Avaya into her car seat. I got into the passenger seat and all was silent for awhile except for Avaya singing softly to herself.

Once Lily drove off the property she sighed heavily. “I’m so sorry about that,” she said.

“No, don’t be sorry, it’s okay.” I was kind of glad I got to meet the piece of shit who called himself a father to Avaya. Now I knew who I was up against in terms of fights.

“No, you really shouldn’t have to be ostracized like that. He doesn’t even know you. God, he’s such a jerk.” She pounded the steering wheel with the heel of her palm.

“It’s really fine, Lily. He’s not going to get to me. You’re not his family anymore.” I am.

“Yeah but he’s still Avaya’s father and unfortunately I have to share her with him,” she grumbled.

“Not if you took it to court,” I really thought that would be the best idea in the situation.

“I can’t afford a lawyer, Zak,” she sighed. “And even if I could I’d be too scared of the outcome. I don’t like court.”

“Why would you be scared? He left you for god’s sake! He was an absentee father for a good portion of Avaya’s life so far. The judge would have to be a complete idiot to ignore that.” I fought back. “I’m honestly disgusted he even calls himself her father.”

“Can we wait to talk about this until later?” Lily whispered, nodding her head back towards Avaya. I nodded.

When we got back to their apartment Avaya asked if she could go play for a little while.

“Of course, sweetie. Mommy will call you when it’s time for dinner.” Lily sounded exhausted when she excused her daughter.

“I really think you should take this to court, Lily,” I sighed. “This guy is breaking you down mentally. Fuck, I just met you and I can see that.”

“But I can’t,” she shook her head. “They’ll find things they shouldn’t.”

I narrowed my eyes. “What do you mean by that?”

“Nothing, I’m just scared of it.”

I didn’t care anymore. I took her hands in mine and held them to my chest. She gasped and looked up at me in shock but I didn’t let her go. I needed to get my message across.

“You don’t need to be scared,” I said firmly. “I’m here; fucking use me all you want, I don’t care. Take my strength.”

“Zak…” she whispered.

“No, Lily. I’m serious. When I met you…I didn’t think I’d get this involved with you. But you and Avaya won me over and I’m not fucking leaving. I’m going to be here for you no matter what, alright? We will fight this.” I squeezed her hands, refusing to let them go.

“You don’t know…” She shook her head, grasping her bottom lip between her teeth.

“I know enough.”

She only sighed and, to my surprise, rested her temple against our hands on my chest. We stayed like that for only a moment before I released her hands to hug her. She froze against me but I kept hugging her. She didn’t hug me back but I didn’t care.

I felt something tug on my pants and I kind of jumped and looked down. Avaya was standing there, staring up at us with mystified brown eyes. I let go of Lily and she stepped away instantly.

“Mommy?” Avaya asked.

“Yes, my girl?”

“Can I have ravioli for dinner?”

“Oh. Sure…I’ll get it started right now.”

“Okay. Bye, Zak.” Avaya waved up at me before disappearing back to her room.

I stared after the peculiar little girl for a minute and kind of smiled. But I felt Lily’s eyes on me now so I turned to look at her.

“Maybe you should get going,” she said softly. “It’s dinnertime and all…”

“Right, yeah, I’ll head home. Just give me a call or a text or something if anything happens or whatever.” I scratched the back of my head and started to head for the door. My fight wasn’t quite gone; I just didn’t want to push it too much.

“Hey, Zak?” Her voice stopped me at the door.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

I grinned. “You’re welcome, Lily. See you later.”