Worth a Fight

im alone i dont have friends i just stay alone its easyer to be alone then be bothered my alot of annoying people who annoy me. i miss gerard hes married and has a daughter hes happy i am. im not really happy but i say i am so people will leave me alone with my thoughts. my thoughts are my only friends...i know its stupid...i get ready for school and grab my skate bord and i scate to school, i can multi task so im texting and scateing at the same time when i run into someone "oww" i whined "im so sooooo sorry " the person said i looked up and my heart stoped "g-gerard" he was here infront of me i could touch him i can embrase him i wanted to so badly.. "jaylin?" i was shocked he still knew my name. i was sitting on the ground still i got up quickly and bolted to the school he ran after me yelling "jaylin! jaylin! come back!" i turned back and he rammed into me knocking me off my feet again he was ontop of me i blushed and pushed him off of me scrambleing to my feet. "leave me alone!" i yelled at him and i contiued to school, "please im begging you you saved my life jaylin please come back i need you im sliping again! i cant handle the pressure of being a singer a dad and a husband lynsey is driveing me crazy! " he called to me i loved when he said my name i jogged back over to him and held his face between my hands "gerard i need you to listen, i wont always be there for you u need to relise if you are starting to slip u can call me or text me or even tweet me, theres even video chat i will get to you as fast as i can and i will help you baby" he smiled when i called him baby and he hugged me and lifted me off the ground, he carried me to the tour bus " whats your adress we'll go get your stuff your comeing on tour with us i dont care what you say i wont be stressed durring tour without you honey!" i was dyeing to kiss him have him pin me to his bed and do me...hard...that night i had to stay in gerards bed i was kind of exited thinking he was gonna do stuff to me in the middle of the night! that dident happen we where an hour outta town when i herd them....the voices..."go jump off the buss whore" i slowly got out of the bed and walked outta the buss we where parked i climed to the roof...i couldent control myself i had scitzofrenia i forgot my meds at home i sqweesed my eyes shut and jumped....the pain was un berable i cried my head bounced off the concreat my limbs scraped my left led snaped i closed my eyes and waied for death to come for me..