Incestual Orgies and Other Fond Memories

“What the hell were you thinking!?”

Ten minutes later and Jack’s high has apparently worn off enough for him to process the enormity of what just happened.

Jack runs a hand through his hair, mussing it up. He’d look adorable if it weren’t for the panic stricken look and the slightly crazed air in his eyes.

“Just…just stay away from me. Fuck, I need to call Alex.”

Before Zack can even beg him not to, plead with him it was just a one time thing, a stupid mistake, Jack has left to his own room.

The door clicks and Zack can hear it lock.

They’ve never locked the doors, in all the time they’d lived there. Not even when Alex and Jack were having strictly PG times, the doors were still usually left wide open, not matter how many times Rian had begged them to please, just shut it so he could avoid walking in on that.

Through the thin walls, Jack’s voice is clearly heard.

“Baby, please, I just… I need you to come home okay?” His voice is filled with tears and Zack hated himself for being the cause of that pain. Matt’s parting words ring in his head.

“Be careful.”

He barricaded himself in his room, terrified of what would happen next. The front door banged and Alex‘s racing footsteps head straight into his and Jack’s room.

Zack couldn’t hear what happened in there but the answer is pretty obvious, judging from Alex’s yell of “what the fuck.”

The door opened, crashed against the wall before creaking back on itself. Zack squeezed his eyes shut, praying for a miracle, not that one would ever happen.

“You did what?” Alex said, his tone cold and jagged.

Without opening his eyes, Zack whispered a reply that didn’t quite answer the question. “I’m so sorry. I was stoned, I wasn’t thinking-”

Alex cut him off. “Damn right you weren’t. You fucking asshole, what were you trying to do? Break us up?”

The harsh tone is gone, replaced by pure fury as Alex’s voice loudens, resounding through the apartment.

Zack opened his eyes just in time to see the fist collide with his temple. He didn’t retaliate, despite having enough power in his left hand to crush Alex. He takes what he deserves.

Pain. More yelling. Then his miracle happens.

Rian appears, dragging Alex off Zack’s limp body, speaking to him calmly in an attempt to dissolve the anger.

Jack is there now too, crying and begging Alex to forgive him. At those words, Alex went weak,
forgetting any rage and immediately moving over to Jack, cradling him.

“I know baby, I know. I’m not mad at you, this wasn’t your fault.” A glare directed at Zack. “You didn’t ask for this.”

“Alex, say sorry. You don’t hate Zack, this was nothing, just a mistake. Please just apologise and we can move on.” Jack begged.

Alex shot Zack a look full of contempt, making Zack’s insides shrivel up and die. “As if. He asked for what he got.”

Rian led the two away, letting Matt move into the room.

“What did I fucking tell you?” His voice isn’t angry like Alex’s, nor scared like Jack’s. Instead it’s almost worse: disappointment.

Zack just shook his head, tears threatening to make their presence known. Matt can’t hate him that much; he’s sat on the bed now, arms snaking around Zack’s shoulders.

“You don’t have to be here.” He muttered, although even as the words left his mouth he was pressing his head against Matt’s chest, searching for comfort.

“I don’t hate you.” Matt reassured. “I’m angry and upset for Alex, but as I said. I know what it’s like to love someone who you can’t have.”

Matt falls asleep somewhere around one-ish. Zack lies awake, staring into a corner shrouded in darkness, hating himself.

In the morning he doesn’t dare leave the safety of his room. Not when Alex is still there. He knows he and Jack made up last night. His insomnia can be partially blamed on the loud banging noises from next door caused by the very obvious act of Alex remarking Jack as his own.

When Alex and Matt leave for a class, Zack braves the kitchen. Unfortunately, Jack and Rian are already in there, sitting at the previously unused kitchen table with a coffee mug in Rian’s hands. Hickeys litter the pale skin of Jack’s neck and collarbones, proving Zack’s theory of the banging noises true.

Jack left almost the second after noticing Zack. Rian on the other hand, motions for him to sit down.

“I didn’t mean to Rian, it was so stupid and I hate myself for it.” The words left Zack’s lips before he could stop them, bubbling over like something toxic.

“Just sit.” Rian’s calm tone is practically an order, and Zack can’t help but obey.

“I’m mad at you.” He says and Zack’s heart sinks. “You nearly ruined a relationship. And not just any, but one between our closest friends. I though those two being a couple would mess up our group. I never counted on it being you.”

“I can move out.” Zack started. He had no-where to go, but how could he possible stay after this.

“You think that’ll fix it?” Rian questioned. “You think that’s what Jack wants? What I want? Alex may
want it but he’s angry, that’s understandable. Running away won’t solve anything. We still love you.”

Part of Zack is relieved he won’t have to leave the boys he calls family, he people he loves. Part of him is terrified at having to face what he’d done.

“I still love you all too.” He whispered, getting up to leave. Rian pushed over the remnants of his coffee and Zack downed the lukewarm liquid thankfully.

Jack was in the living room and Zack walked past quickly, avoiding eye contact until he felt a hand on his arm.

“I’m not angry.” Jack muttered, keeping his gaze on the floor. “And Alex doesn’t hate you, not really. Just give him time.”

With that said, Jack pulled Zack into an awkward one armed hug, making sure to keep distance between them. It was that gesture that reduced Zack to tears. There had never been boundaries between any of them, and with one stupid action he’d caused them to be put up. Walls blocking him out from the rest of their group, sectioning him off.

That hurt, more than anything. Alex’s anger and hatred, even the punches, could never compare to this utter loneliness

The fact he’d brought it on himself was the worst part.