Ready to Love Again

Ryan woke up early for practice to a text message from Jamie asking him if he could pick him up for practice on his way through town. Ryan sighed, it was going to be an eventful morning if Corinne was awake. Ryan prayed that he could pull up out front and honk for Jamie, but that would be too easy with the way his life had been going.

Out front

Just woke up, come in.

I really don’t want to see Corinne

She’s sleeping dude

Ryan sighed and put the car in park before walking up the walkway to the house. He quietly opened the door behind him and shut it before going into the kitchen. Ryan accidentally slammed the cabinet shut and swore to himself as he poured a cup of coffee.

“Who the fuck is banging the cabinets,” Corinne said coming into the kitchen.

“Motherfucker,” Ryan mumbled to himself.

“I should have figured it’d be your ass.”

“Good morning to you too.”

“Go fuck yourself.”

“Would you kiss your mother with that mouth?”

“No, but I’ll kiss your father and your brother with it.”

Ryan had to turn his head because he almost laughed at that. Jamie came into the kitchen and sighed, “I told you not to wake her up.”

“I didn’t,” Ryan said.

“You did too,” Corinne said. “Banging the cabinets and shit like you own the place.”

“Corinne, don’t start,” Jamie warned his cousin.

“Shut the fuck up, I’m tired. Let me go back to sleep.”

Jamie glared at Ryan when they got into the car. “What the hell is that look for?”

“I tell you not to wake her up and what do you do? You fucking wake her up.”

“I didn’t purposely awaken Satan’s daughter from her peaceful slumber in hell. I was grabbing a mug for my coffee and the cabinet slammed shut.”

“She hates you.”

“The feeling’s mutual.”

"I think you hate all women," Jamie said. "You’re even shitty to half of the WAGs."

Ryan sighed, "They're all annoying except the ones I've known since I got here. They're all after fame and money. Shane's flavor of the week has been with more than one NHL guy, so please enlighten me as to why I should be nice to fake bitches."

Jamie smirked, "Save this fire for the game. Damn, I would hate to be Crawford tonight."

"Make sure Corinne is there. One look at her and I'll nail Bollig into next week."

Ryan worked hard throughout practice, but the puck wasn't finding the back of the net. His wrist felt funny and he sighed to himself. He took a nasty slash the previous game against Chicago. The worst was playing the same team back to back.

"You ok, Factor," Gabe asked as they made their way to the locker room.

"I'm fine," Ryan lied.

"Are you injured? That slash was brutal."

Ryan pulled his hand out of his glove and rolled his wrist around, "I'm ok."

Ryan took a quick shower after practice and signed a few autographs for fans. His wrist was throbbing when he arrived back at his new condo that he had finally settled into a few days before. Ryan looked through the medicine cabinet in the bathroom, popped three Tylenol with codeine into his mouth, and crawled into bed for his pregame nap.

Ryan skated around the ice during warm-ups and smiled at a few of the Avalanche fans that had signs welcoming him back to the team. The worst ones were the fan girls who had the “Marry me, Gabe” signs and the “I want to shake O’Reilly’s shamrock.” Ryan smiled to himself as he remembered how much Alyssa had hated those girls. Ryan patiently awaited his turn on the blue line when he flashed back to the day he had met Alyssa.

She never took her eyes off of the cup that she held with one hand in her lap. Ryan had met her through a teammate at one of his parties in junior. She sat on the couch in the living room while one of her friends made out with one of his teammates. Ryan couldn’t remember who it was, but he remembered that Alyssa was just as uncomfortable as he was. He grabbed a red solo cup, filled it with beer and took a seat next to her. She looked up when she felt his presence and he smiled at her.

“You look just as bored as I am.”

“My best friend ditched me for Hodgman.”

“I’m Ryan by the way,” he said sticking out his hand.

“Alyssa,” she replied smiling. “Great goal the other night.”

“Thank you.”

They fell into a comfortable conversation and as it turned out they were both graduating that same year. Ryan from a Catholic prep school nearby and her from a public high school. They both had two sisters. Ryan was the only one with a brother. Alyssa was amazed at how his parents took in foster children and how small the house was. Ryan drove her home after the party and walked her to her door. Her dad opened the door and saw the face of the Erie Otters and invited him in the house.

Ryan smiled when he remembered Alyssa taking him outside when he left and she gave him a quick kiss before her dad found out. Ryan had asked her on a date that weekend and they had been together ever since before she was taken away from him that night by some asshole who didn’t know that you should never drive drunk.

Ryan quickly snapped out of his thoughts when Gabe nudged him to pay attention and Ryan felt the pain return to his wrist. When Ryan took the first shift of the night, he took a shot and yelped in pain. Shaw hit him from behind and Ryan crosschecked him back getting a two minute penalty. Ryan swore at the referee as he skated to the box. Ryan slammed the door and sat down. He removed his hand from the glove and flexed his wrist hearing a cracking noise.

“FUCK!”

Hossa scored on the power play thanks to a spin o’rama pass from Kane and Ryan skated back to the bench and straight down the runway. The trainer followed him and Ryan told him about what happened with his wrist. He helped Ryan remove his jersey and his shoulder pads before sitting down on the table. The trainer moved it around and Ryan groaned in pain.

“It’s definitely not broken, just sprained.”

“Can I play the rest of the game?”

“I’m afraid no.”

“Can you just freeze it?”

“Absolutely not. Both Shaw and Bollig are out for your head. We can’t risk it getting injured worse than it already is. Sacco would kill us both. We’ll look at it again tomorrow and see if it’s any better. Ice it and try not to sleep on it.”

“Just my fucking luck,” Ryan said going into the locker room, changing out of his gear. He left the arena after taking a shower and getting dressed. He was halfway down the hallway when he groaned out loud. Corinne was standing in the hallway on her phone. “I seriously don’t know what to say, thank you I guess. I’ll call you tomorrow...who gives a fuck? He’s Jamie’s friend, not mine. He’s a fucking asshole, I hope he’s out for the season. I’ll be back in Philadelphia in a couple of weeks. Bye Tye. Love you too.”

“Maybe you should be a little more careful where you say shit around here,” Ryan said before he could stop himself. “You never know who is lurking the halls.”

“Quit jacking off so much and you wouldn’t hurt your wrist during the game. It was one small crosscheck, Tye gets into scruffs all of the time and never gets hurt. I think you’re a pussy.”

“I think you’re a cunt.” Ryan winced at the use of that word. He hated it and never used it, but if Corinne was a guy, he would have punched her in the face.

Corinne laughed. “Do you kiss your mother with that mouth,” she said throwing his words from earlier in the day back in his face.

“Can you go fuck off?”

Corinne smirked, “You know Factor, I don’t understand why those girls had those signs for you tonight. You’re a dickhead.”

Ryan walked off before he would say something else that he regretted. He thought about Alyssa the whole way home. She had been on his mind since the beginning of the night. Driving by their old townhouse brought back so many memories. Ryan remembered coming home from a road trip and she greeted him at the door with a hug and a kiss. He also recalled how she would cook dinner in their kitchen and yell at him for eating it before it was ready. They had their whole future mapped out, the apartment Ryan lived in now was at the bottom of their list when they started talking about children. They may have still been considered kids, but they wanted the house with the white picket fence.

Ryan hadn’t even realized he had been crying until he pulled into the garage of his condo and felt the tears fall down his face. His wrist was forgotten, memories of Alyssa and their time together filled his brain. Ryan took double the amount of pain medicine that he was told to take and fell into a blissful sleep.

Ryan woke up in the morning and felt hung over, but he wasn’t. His eyes were bloodshot and his head hurt from practically crying himself to sleep. His wrist felt ten times worse and he groaned as he pulled on his track suit and drove to the arena. Thanks to modern technology and updated equipment at the arena, Ryan’s wrist was x-rayed. It showed a bad strain and he would be out for the next four games, which meant he’d miss games against San Jose, Edmonton, and Minnesota. He’d return against Chicago which was ironic.

Jamie invited him over for breakfast and Ryan declined, instead he went to Starbucks down the street from his apartment and got a latte and a scone. Ryan was walking out of the coffee shop when he noticed Corinne sitting there with another female. She looked up and saw he was staring at her. This earned him a finger salute and he rolled his eyes before making the short walk back to his apartment building. Ryan drank his coffee and ate his breakfast while watching TV. His phone rang and he answered the call from his brother Cal. Cal thought it was funny when Ryan told him all about Corinne and their dislike for each other.

“You know what they say,” Cal began. “If you two are picking on each other that means that one of you like each other.”

“I’d like for her to leave me the fuck alone.”

Cal laughed once again, “What’s wrong?”

Ryan sighed, “I can’t stop thinking about Alyssa. I feel so guilty for her death. If I hadn’t called her when I was drunk, she’d still be here.”

“It’s not your fault,” Cal replied. “Stop beating yourself up about it. No one told that driver to drive drunk. I know she was coming to get you, but you and I both know she wouldn’t have minded doing anything else. She loved you like no one else and she did anything for you. Why don’t you call mom and invite her to Colorado for a few days. I think you need family time. If you don’t want to call mom, call Tara and have her bring Shea down for a few days. Mom may even bring her if you ask. You know she’ll cheer you up.”

“You’re right,” Ryan said. “I’ll call you sometime this weekend.”

“Alright, take care of your wrist and yourself. I love you, bro.”

“I love you too, bro. Be safe.”

Ryan hung up the phone and sighed, maybe time with his family would be what he needed. He just hoped he wouldn’t have to deal with Corinne for a while. There was a knock on the door at his apartment and Ryan prayed it wasn’t some psycho fan asking for an autograph. No one came to visit him and if they did come, they called first. Ryan opened the door and was shocked to see Corinne standing on the other side.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“Trust me, I’m not thrilled about this either.”

“Thrilled about what?”

“Jamie is making me stay with you for a few days to help you with your wrist.”

“Hell no.”

“Fuck yes.”

Ryan groaned, “Fuck my life.” Corinne smirked as she pushed passed him into the house, her duffle bag hitting him in the stomach. The next few days were going to be World War III and Ryan wanted to throw Jamie onto the frontlines.