Mirrors

May 7th, Tuesday
12:00pm

Finally our belongings had arrived. Movers had spent all morning bringing in our belongings and I was happy to just spend some time in the library placing our books in the many bookcases that filled this room. Quietly, music was playing from my phone while I opened box after box, and I hummed along to each song.

While I worked, I heard quiet footsteps enter the room and I quickly turned around as I was startled. It was Blair and I smiled, "You startled me."

He gave a short laugh, remaining serious. "What are you doing?"

"Just putting away some books." I replied. He came and sat next to me on the floor, he began to help me place the books neatly in. "Are you here to see Hudson?" I asked.

He nodded, "He wants to go over the plans for your party on Thursday."

"What do you do exactly?"

"Everything. My main career is being an event planner, I also do a little interior designing on the side. And recently I've dabbled in fashion." Though he was focussed on placing each book perfectly next to each other, he glanced at me.

"You sound very talented." I smiled as I continued to work with him.

"Hardly, I'm an amateur." He replied. I lightly laughed, realizing he said the same thing I did yesterday when he complimented me on my art. Despite how serious and maybe even stoic he seemed, I understood that this was how he was. Unlike other people when they find something funny, he won't kill himself laughing, just a smile and a short laugh will suffice for him.

"You're American I take it?"

He nodded, "Born and raised in Miami, Florida. Moved to Los Angeles when I was 15, lived there till I graduated high school and went to New York for university. After that I went to San Francisco for a bit, but since then I've lived everywhere."

"Impressive." I said as an understatement, I smiled and continued organizing each piece of classic literature. "You've got good taste in literature." He spoke.

"Thanks." I smiled.

"So I notice you call Holbrook, Hudson. Why is that?" He asked, stopping and leaning back onto his elbows. I also stopped and turned to him, laughing a bit. "I was wondering why you all call him Holbrook. I mean, I know that's his name, but since I first met him he's asked me to call him Hudson."

"Hm." He smirked, "So how's the instant fame treating you?"

I rolled my eyes and laughed lightly, "I'm not sure yet. There were a few photos of us in the paper this morning, everyone seems to forget that I have a name. I'm known to the public as 'Holbrook Hudson's American wife.'"

"They'll learn it eventually." He said as a joke but kept himself composed. I just smiled.

"In the public eye. Married and a baby on the way." He nodded, "I find that interesting, especially for Holbrook. When he was with Nor-"

The large doors of the library were opened and Hudson strode in. "I was in the white drawing room, Comeau. Mrs. Davies told you that." He didn't look too impressed. I watched Blair for a moment, Wait, what was he going to say? Was he about to say Nora?

Blair smirked and shrugged a shoulder as he got up, "I know, but the door to the library was open and I thought I'd help your wife put things away."

"We have help for that." He inhaled, tucking his hands into his pockets.

I stood up, "It's okay Hudson, I was talking with him. I'm sorry I kept him from you."

"It's alright dear." He gave a small smile, approaching me and kissing my cheek. "It's just Blair and I need to spend this afternoon planning for Thursday."

My smile faltered and I looked over my shoulder at the clock, checking the time. "Oh, but Hudson, my doctor's appointment is today. They're going to do an ultrasound, it's at one."

He closed his eyes and held a hand against the side of his face, "I can't believe I forgot. Avery, I'm so sorry but I'm not gonna be able to come with you, with the movers and everything going on right now with the restaurant, I completely forgot."

I gnawed at my bottom lip and slowly nodded, "Okay..."

"Love, I'm so sorry. But Blair and I have to get all the planning done today. I'll send Mrs. Davies with you."

I shook my head, "No, I'll be fine on my own."

"Are you sure?" He looked guilty. And he should, I've told him that today I had my appointment. I nodded and gave him a reassuring smile since I wasn't in the mood to start something, especially since Blair is here. "Have a car waiting for me, I'm just going to run upstairs and change. I'll be right down." I excused myself and glanced at Blair before leaving.

During the drive to the hospital I became distracted by what Blair had said, or at least what I thought he was going to say. The driver and parked in front of the prenatal wing of the hospital for me to go out. As soon as I checked in, I was called into Dr. Wrightley's office. She sat at her desk quickly scrawling down something before clicking her pen closed and tucking it into the front pocket of her coat. She smiled warmly as she turned in her chair toward me. "You must be Avery Hudson?"

"Yes, hello." I smiled back.

"Dr. Wagner referred you to me, I was honoured when I received his call. He's one of the best, we studied together at Cambridge."

"He is pretty great." I smiled, taking a seat.

"So I've received your file and have gone through it already, so you're pregnant. Congratulations." She smiled as she glanced up from the file folder. "Thanks." I nodded.

"So before we get to the ultrasound, I wanted to ask how you're doing right now? I understand that you have type 1 diabetes and from Wagner's notes you've been struggling to balance your glucose levels." Resting her elbows on her desk, she watched and waited for me intently. Again I nodded, "Yes I have, I think I've been struggling to find a balance because of all the stress I'm going through right now. My husband and I just moved here from New York and there's just a lot going on right now."

"Mhm. Well I will continue to check up on you weekly and I'll start you on a new meal plan that won't negatively affect your pregnancy. Of course, unlike many women who do choose to eat whatever they want, this will limit you on what you eat."

"I've maintained a healthy diet for quite some time now, I'm used to eating certain foods." I shrugged a shoulder and laughed.

"Good, good. Have you checked your levels this morning?"

"Yes, they're good."

"Brilliant. If there's nothing else, shall we go onto the ultrasound?" She raised an eyebrow, inquisitively.

I took a deep breath. This was it. I was far along enough to hear a heartbeat, and to find out how far along I really am, that is if I'm not ten weeks. A part of me prayed that I was ten weeks, if I was then it would be Hudson's. I knotted my fingers and smiled, "Yes, let's do the ultrasound."

"Listen to that." He smiled, listening intently to the recording over my phone. We sat on our bed and Hudson had wrapped his arm around me as I nestled close to him, smiling too. "That's our baby." He whispered, gently rubbing my stomach.

The sound of the baby's heartbeat was beautiful, I had actually cried during the ultrasound. Even though my baby is far from coming into this world, I can't help but fall more in love with him or her. When the recording stopped, he replayed it for about the third time now, and I didn't mind.

He set the phone down on the bed and adjusted himself so he was now hovering over my stomach. "Hello little one, this is daddy talking. After hearing your steady heartbeat, I can't wait to meet you."

I lightly smiled and swallowed as I watched and listened to him talk softly to the baby. I found out that I was nine weeks rather than what I had thought all along. Dr. Wrightley had confirmed that conception was within the first week of March, and as I thought back to the night that Christian and I had spent together, I recalled that the first time in the evening that we...well, made love, he used protection. And I guess I had forgotten that we did it a second time, in the bedroom. Without protection.

The first week of March, Hudson was still in England.

My stomach turned and I closed my eyes, sighing inwardly.

"What's wrong?" He asked, looking up at me after making small talk with the baby. I gave a comforting smile and shook my head, "Nothing, I'm just tired I guess."

"Well let's stay in bed, drink our hot chocolate-I think it's cooled down now- and finish watching the movie." He sat back next to me, reaching for the mugs on the night table as we resumed the movie on my laptop.

As we watched the movie, or I guess as Hudson watched, I felt a sick feeling in my gut and I could hardly focus. Some how I always knew it was Christian's, despite my useless prayers and hopes for it to be my husband's.