Don't Turn Around

“Grande non-fat cinnamon dolce latte extra hot” a middle aged woman ordered in a monotone voice.

“Could I get your name?”

“Sheena” she said before handing me her Starbucks card to pay for her drink.

She walked to the side and I blew the piece of hair that was hanging in front of my face away. I’d been working for 7 hours today and I was run off my feet. Rachel decided to call in 'sick' after pointing out that she saw me at breakfast last Saturday morning. Of course after mentioning it to my boss. He took it upon himself then to under staff the place and give me a long shift as payback.

I began to make the lady’s drink when my earphone notified me that there was someone in the drive through ready to have his or her order taken.

“Can I get some help out here” I called to Jon, my boss who was sitting in the back playing with his phone.

“Actually I was thinking about heading out, you can handle the place, just make sure to lock up eh” he said, getting up to pull his sweater on.

I wiped the sweat from my forehead and bit my tongue. I was already in hot water and if I said what I wanted to say I’d be fired no doubt.

The next half hour was busy and when it calmed down I started closing duties. I was in the back rinsing some coffee pots when I heard the bell telling me that someone had come inside the store. Sighing, and grabbing a towel to dry my hands I walked back into the front to see Jack and Rian standing at the cash smiling.

“Hey!” I exclaimed, “What are you doing here?”

“I’m a Starbucks addict” Rian replied, “And Jack is my bitch”

We all laughed and the old couple who were sitting in the corner shot us a horrified look.

I swept my bangs out of my face and put my hands on my hips.

“So, what will it be?” I asked.

“Carmel Macchiato” Rian said smiling before smacking Jack’s shoulder and walking off to the washroom.

“I’ll take one of those Vanilla Frappuccino’s” Jack added.

I ‘forgot’ to enter their drinks into the computer, thinking I might as well if I was in trouble already.

“I should stop by more often” Jack said, winking at me.

“You should! My boss is taking out a personal vendetta on me and today has been hell” I replied, my face falling.

“Why? Giving out too many free drinks?” Jack joked.

“No, Rachel actually saw me at breakfast on Saturday and thought it would be funny to tell him” I replied.

“Oh shit, I guess that’s my fault, I’m sorry Sutton”

“Its not your fault! He has a stick up his ass anyway” I replied laughing, and he smiled back.

I started to make their drinks, and I watched Jack silently for a few minutes. He was chewing gum and looking down at his feet. He was wearing black skinny jeans, a shirt that read “Glamour Kills” on it and a grey beanie; he looked pretty damn adorable. After the kiss last Saturday we watched another movie and then I went home, we never really talked about it but I couldn’t deny the butterflies that I got in my stomach every time I thought about it. I wondered if he felt the same, but I pushed that thought out of my head, there was no way. I mean I was struggling; I had a restraining order against my ex, no parents and a handful of other skeletons in my closet. He could probably tell I was a loaded gun.

We’d been texting a little since then, it was only Thursday but this was the first time I’d seen him since that day.

“You okay?” Jack asked, and my head shot up. I realized that I had dazed out and poured steamed milk all over the counter and now it was now all over the floor. It had even spilled down the front of my apron.

“Shit” I said, closing my eyes and pinching the bridge of my nose.

Jack reached over the counter and pulled my hand away from my face, squeezing it warmly in his. All I could do was stare into his brown eyes and I felt a lump growing in the back of my throat, why did I feel like I was going to cry? Our stare lasted for 5 seconds before the old couple seated in the back got up to leave, snapping us out of the moment. One of the corners of my mouth turned up and I looked down at my feet. Realizing I was covered in milk I untied my apron and pulled it over my head and I looked back to Jack.

“What are you doing tonight?” he blurted out, then smiling bashfully at his spontaneous outburst.

“After this, nothing” I replied softly with a smile.

“Alex is having a party tonight, come over to my house when you get off and we can go together… if you want” he added.

I nodded, “sure" and shot him another smile.

"Hey'd you invite Sutton to the party tonight?" Rian asked, making his entrance back from the bathroom.

"He did, I'd love to come!" I said.

I finished up the new drink I made Rian and handed them both their drinks.

"When do you get off?" Jack asked me, taking a sip of his frappaccino.

I looked down at my watch, "about half an hour, I just have to finish up cleaning and lock up for the night"

"See you soon then?" Jack replied.

"I'll text you" I replied, and then they both left.

The rest of my shift went by quickly I was so giddy. So many thoughts swirled around in my mind, like what was I going to wear? Should I drink before I go to Jack's? Probably not, that might be weird. What were his intentions? Should I invite Leah? I finally finished cleaning and I grabbed my backpack and sweater, ready to lock up. As I was fiddling with the lock I got a chill when I heard a male voice clear his throat from behind me in the parking lot. I spun around to see none other than Ian standing there leaned up against his car.

"What are you doing here?" I asked trying to keep my voice steady.

"I wanted to see you" he replied. I stayed standing where I was.

He took a few steps closer, "Just because you're out of jail doesn't mean that I want to see you" I said, I could feel my heart racing with fear.

"Baby, you're the one who put me there remember? You're going to have to pay for that sometime."

"Get away from me" I said, he was now close enough to grab my wrist and yank me toward him.

I felt my body become paralyzed with fear but also nostalgia, I was no stranger to his firm grasp and threatening words. After staring me down for a few seconds he released me and I ran to my car and locked the doors. He didn't move from where he was standing, I could tell he was mad.

I started my car and exited the parking lot and my eyes filled up with tears. A wave of nausea came over me as all of the memories came flooding back from when we were together. It was his good looks and charm that won me over initially, and I became so wrapped up in the thought of having someone to fall back on that I never realized just how bad his temper was. Its hard to explain the feeling, but when you don't have a family to love you its hard to throw away a relationship when its the only sense of security you've ever felt.

I drove my usual route home and felt my self calming down. I went inside and thew my stuff on my bed and decided to have a hot shower. I stood under the scalding water and let all of the memories and pain melt away.

Climbing out of the shower I wrapped myself tightly in a towel and started to dry my hair. I decided I'd straighten it for once, I usually I left it in its natural waves. I felt the anticipation and excitement began to creep up again thinking about Jack.

After I dried my hair I went and picked out something to wear. After rummaging through my closet I chose a pair of maroon coloured skinny jeans and a grey slouchy tank top that had a skull and crossbones on it. I flat ironed my hair, threw on some makeup and grabbed my little black purse. Before heading to Jack's house, I decided to go to the liquor store and pick up some alcohol. I thought I should probably text him and let him know I wasn't bailing.

Just at the liquor store, did you want anything?

I sent as I climbed out of my car and went in. I grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels for myself when I felt my phone buzz in my pocket.

Nope just you ;)

It read. My heart fluttered a little bit reading the words, but I shoved my phone back into my pocket an got in line to pay. I stopped in quick at a convenience store to grab some Coke and then drove to Jack's, trying to remember the way there. I pulled into the driveway and grabbed my alcohol from the seat beside me, and took a deep breath. I felt a bit nervous for some reason, but I decided not to think about it too much and forced myself to walk up the the front porch.

I knocked once at the front door, waiting anxiously for the door to open. When it did and I saw Jack's warm brown eyes I forgot why I had been nervous at all.