The Road to Ruins

Things just aren’t the same. Faces are different, sounds are different, even the feelings are different. Disconnected from all surroundings, Arianna sighs tracing her finger along the table; the different table.

Although she sits at this table daily, drinking coffee, eating, writing, or reading, it feels changed and unfamiliar. Its grooves and scratches feel foreign beneath her fingertip. She can’t understand why it’s so different now or what keeps her feeling so distant from reality.

Friends don’t exist, or if they do it’s as if they hate her. Her family hasn’t been supportive of her in years, or supportive in the least.

Is it because she’s a people-pleaser that they think she doesn’t deserve the time to be thought of? Is it because she’s truly that terrible to be around? Surely, it can’t be that she’s so unbearable to be around that friends dread her presence.

Maybe then that’s why she’s never invited or asked to do things. To go to social gatherings, to be invited to just do nothing; any offer would be a pleasure. But of course it’s impossible to receive such acknowledgement of existence.

Another morning passes, and Arianna finishes her coffee and reads one last chapter before heading out numbly into the world.