Right Here in My Arms

I had gotten home from the lunch date and sat in the living room to read a book. I knew that my father wouldn’t be home for a while and I definitely knew that when he got home he would want to hear all about the lunch date with the client went. Of course he’d then want to celebrate considering he’d think they’d already agree, but honestly, I didn’t know if a celebration was in order for this one. I don’t know, I didn’t feel exactly confident about this client.

I looked up at the door as it opened and my father walked in. “Hey,” I smiled and set my book down.

“Hey!” he grinned and closed the door, “How’d it go today?”

I shrugged at his question tossed my book on the table in front of me. “It went alright, I supposed,” I replied.

I took his shoes off and walked over to the tan recliner beside me and sat down. “Tell me about it,” he said.

I told him all about the lunch date from how late he was down to him asking to buy me dinner as a friend. While I explained everything to him and thought about it more, it made it seem like he wasn’t interested. He seemed more interested in me than the record label. He seemed like, even though he asked a few questions about it, he just didn’t seem all around interested to hear about the label and what we can offer him... Er, what the label can offer him. “To be honest, he seemed a little disinterested in hearing about the label. I don’t know,” I shrugged, looking down to the flooring.

“Ah, I’m sure you did fine. Maybe he’s one of those people who want to think about it before immediately taking the offer. Maybe he wants to talk it over with the band,” my father mentioned, before patting my shoulder, “It’s all right if he doesn’t want to sign with the label, though. Maybe it’s not what they’re looking for.”

I sighed, “Yeah, I suppose that’s true. He said that he’d call tomorrow with his answer, so I guess we’ll find out then.” I looked back up at him and smiled.

“How was his personality though? Did he seem like a good guy, I’m mean, for a band guy,” he questioned, chuckling.

“I didn’t sit with him long enough to figure him out, but he seemed pretty nice, I guess. He wasn’t a demanding jerk like a lot of the guys I’ve met with before - which was pretty great. If I decide to go with him to that dinner that he offered to buy me, then I might be able to figure him out more,” I explained.

My father nodded and stood up, “Well, let’s go grab something to eat.” He called a cab and soon enough it arrive. He told the driver where to go and left.

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“Goodnight sweetheart. I’ll see you tomorrow,” my father kissed my forehead and then retreated into his bedroom.

“Goodnight,” I said as I also walked into my bedroom. I shut the door and turned the light on before walking over to the window to close the white shades. I pull the black curtain so the sun - it mother nature decided it to be sunny - wouldn’t wake me up in the morning. I changed into my PJ’s and climbed into my bed. I grabbed the book from the nightstand that was next to my bed and opened up to the last page I had read and continued on that page. I wasn’t able to read for long before the home phone rang. I picked it up and pressed answer, “Hello?”

“Hey, Rowan,”

“Hi mom,” I said, smiling, “How’re you doing?”

“I’m doing well, I suppose. I’m missing you, thought, sweetheart,” she mentioned.

I sighed and nodded, although I knew she couldn’t see, “Yeah, I miss you too.”

“You really should come out and stay with me, honey,”

I sighed and pursed my lips after my mom spoke. I was getting sick of her trying to convince me to come home. I loved her and I care about her and of course I’d love to get home to see her, but I just can’t. I live in here and I’m just getting settled in.

“Honey?”

“Mom, listen. I miss you and I want to be there, but I’m just settling in and getting used to it here,” I told her.

“But everything you know is out here,”

I shook my head and closed my eyes, “Mom.”

“You should be with me. I can take care of you the way that you need me to. I’m your mother and you need your mother in your life,” she barked, anger filling her voice.

I rolled my eyes, “Mom, I love you and I want to be with you, but being with my dad is best for me right now. I want to continue where I am with working with record labels and all that. I can’t very well do that if I’m in California. I promise I’m going to come visit you soon thought, okay?”

She sighed, “I just think it’s best for you to come out here and live with me... That’s all I’m saying.”

“I know,” I mumbled.

"Mother knows best," she retorted

I sighed and pursed my lips

“I just thought I’d call to check in. I’ve got work so I’ll talk to you later,” she said, trying to sound calm but I could hear the anger and annoyance in her voice.

I sighed at her words, knowing she was upset with me considering that was was all ready wanting to hang up on me. “Okay, I love you. I’ll call you later,” I told her, “Bye.” I hung up the phone and set it on the nightstand, sighing and thinking.

My mother knew exactly how to start up drama when things were just getting calm and settling in. She was a woman and worked so hard to get to the top of where she was and she never intended on backing down. She works all day at her job and then gets home only to continue to work from home, in which I hardly get to see her. I didn’t understand why she wanted me to come home to see me, when I knew that she wouldn’t get to see me while I was there. I figured that she just wanted me away from my father, which was potentially true. She was exactly like that.

She highly believed woman were always right and believed that woman ruled that entire world. She fought for what she wanted and typically got what she wanted, no matter what it was. In that way, she was my role model. She was a difficult woman to get along with, which could be why my parents constantly fight. It’s not even questionable that this is why there was a divorce.

I loved my mom and I cared about her, as I always will, but sometimes I really couldn’t stand her. She was judgmental and thought she always knew best, but sometimes she was just plain wrong. She didn’t know best, especially when she thought about me. When it came right down to what I wanted and what I needed, it was to be here with my dad. Yeah, I missed my family and friends what home and that's what I knew, but I was starting knew. This is where I needed to be and this is where I wanted to be