Sequel: Running From Lions

Coffee Shop Soundtrack

Fifteen.

“Hey,” I called once I stepped outside. “Ken.”

She stopped in front of her car and turned to look at me, but she didn’t say anything. A few tears were falling down her cheeks but she still tried to hold the rest back.

“Do you want to talk?” I asked.

She shrugged. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.”

I walked closer to her. “You can say anything. Anything at all.” She still didn’t say a thing. “Really, Makenna. You can tell me how I am a horrible person. You can tell me how much you hate me. You can tell me I’m a bad singer. Anything. Come on.”

She smiled a little bit and I was surprised by it. “Fine,” she said. “You’re a horrible person. I hate you so much,” she sighed, “but you’re not that bad of a singer.”

I smiled and for some reason it made me think that this would be okay. That maybe Makenna would still want to see me. But I brought myself back to reality; I knew that she wouldn’t. Even though she had smiled once and made me smile once, the look on her face was clear. She was horrified.

“Kenna,” I said, “Are you okay?”

She sighed again and a couple more tears slid down her face. “No,” she said. “I’m not.”

“Let me drive you home,” I said, eyeing the keys dangling from her hand.

“I’m fine,” she said, “I didn’t drink that much.”

I sighed, “Better safe than sorry.”

She reluctantly dropped the keys in my hand and got in on the passenger side. I got in after her and turned the key in the ignition.

“How are you going to get back?” She asked.

“I’ll call Pat,” I said, “He can probably drive me back to my car. And if not him, Jared.”

I drove in silence to Makenna’s house, stealing a glance at her during every stop light. She remained with her head propped on her hand and gazing out the window. I pulled into her driveway and turned the car off, and then we both sat there for a minute.

“I tried so hard to stay away from you,” Makenna finally said. I swallowed hard and looked at her. A few seconds later she looked back at me. “I hate myself for not being able to.” She looked at her hands and then back up at me. “I was doing pretty good at first, ya know? When I went to school and we stopped talking I thought that maybe it would finally be over. We were so far apart from each other, I thought it would be easy. But it wasn’t. Even with you a million miles away, you were always right there. I thought about you constantly, I looked at what the band was doing just about everyday, I even scribbled your name on notebook edges like I was in middle school. When I talked to Pat I had to force myself not to bring you up. Until finally it wasn’t you that was hurting me anymore, it was myself. So I decided to stop hurting myself. I stopped listening to the band because it killed me to hear to your voice. I stopped everything. And then I met Derek and I told myself you didn’t matter.”

She stopped and wiped her eyes. I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know what I was supposed to say. I didn’t know why she was telling me this.

“When I found out you were going to be here, I freaked out,” she started again. She looked at her hands. “I had spent so much time trying to stay away from you and away from anything about you. I didn’t want to see you. But it was inevitable. I knew that I would run into you eventually. Small town, same friends.” She paused and leaned her head on her hand again. “And then I couldn’t stop thinking about what would happen when I did see you. When I ran into you at that party, I didn’t know what to do. So I bolted. The feeling that I got when I saw you... It was like I was in high school again. And then I realized that I wouldn’t be able to stay away from you anymore. I showed up at your house the next day. I said I was there to apologize but it was really just my excuse to see you. I was quickly reminded by our conversation that I’m married, I wasn’t in high school, and I shouldn’t want to see you. So I tried harder to stay away from you after that. But the problem is, I can never stay away from you.” She looked up at me. “Why can’t I stay away from you?”

I swallowed hard. “I’m sorry...”

She shook her head. “Yesterday I knew what I was doing. Before I kissed you, while we were in the car, I knew exactly what I was doing. I knew how wrong it was, but I still did it. What is it about you that makes me always come back?”

I didn’t say anything, and neither did she. We just looked at each other. I wondered if she was just really drunk, but I’ve seen Makenna drunk before and she was never like this. I watched as tears fell down her face every now and then. I reached out and wiped her wet cheeks. I had seen her cry so many times that this action was so natural to me. The next one came even more naturally. I leaned in and pressed my lips against hers.