Coffee Shop Soundtrack

I looked at myself in the rearview mirror one more time before getting out of my car and heading towards Makenna’s front door. I took a deep breath and knocked. I was nervous. Partially at the thought of being alone with Makenna today and also because I was scared she would ditch me and I would be standing here looking like an idiot.

“John,” Mrs. Raze answered the door with a bright smile on her face. “This is such a surprise, I didn’t expect to see you. Come in.”

“Hi, Mrs. Raze. How are you?” I asked, politely.

“Oh, I’m good, John. How are you? I haven’t seen you in quite a while.” Mrs. Raze loved me. At least, she used to when I was here almost every day.

“I’m good, I just got back from tour not too long ago.”

“Did you go anywhere new and exciting this time around?” She asked. She was always so amused by our crazy touring stories.

“Mom,” Makenna said, coming down the stairs. “We have plans, we don’t want to sit here talking to you all day.”

Mrs. Raze rolled her eyes. “Well next time then.” She smiled at me and left the two of us in the foyer.

“Let’s go,” Makenna said. She shoved her feet into a pair of flip-flops next to the door and pushed her way through the front door.

I followed her out. “For someone who doesn’t want anything to do with me, you sure got me alone as fast as you could,” I joked.

Makenna looked at me and shook her head. “You never change, do you?” She asked, not happy about the comment I made. “I just want to get this over with.”

I sighed. “Okay, get in,” I said, opening the passenger side of the car.

“Where are we going?” She asked.

“Just get in, Kenna.” She sat in the seat and I closed the door behind her. I got in on the drivers side and started the car up. I started down the road and drove in complete silence. I turned into a nature preserve that we all used to hang out at when we wanted to mess around and parked. We both got out, still not saying a word.

I walked towards a path in the rocks and ducked through trees and past bushes only turning around once to make sure she was following me. I finally stopped when I came to a rock overlooking the lake, and I sat with my legs dangling over, about four feet above the water. I looked toward Makenna who stood there looking at the lake for a minute before climbing up on the rock and sitting pretzel style next to me.

“Why are we here?” She asked, looking at me.

I shrugged and looked back at the lake. “Seemed like the right place.”

“The right place for what?” She asked.

“Anything,” I said.

She didn’t say anything back until she started a new conversation. “So that was weird yesterday, huh?” She asked.

“Yeah, a bit.” I said, thinking back to the conversation Makenna, Ashlyn and I had the previous day.

“I still don’t get it,” Makenna said, “You and Ashlyn.”

“She was just there,” I told her, “When nobody else was.” I looked at Makenna’s face, but I knew I didn’t explain it well enough for her. “It’s a long story.” I said, so she knew I didn’t want to talk about it. “What about you not knowing our music? Is that not weird?”

She shrugged. “I can’t bring myself to listen to it. The new stuff or the old stuff.”

“Why not?” She always used to love our music. I figured she would at least keep up with the bands music to support Pat.

“It’s a long story,” she said, this time telling me she didn’t want to talk about it.

We both sat in silence for a minute staring at the lake until she got annoyed. “John, you said you wanted to finish our conversation from yesterday, so finish it.”

I sighed. “Makenna, do you ever think about how it used to be?”

“What do you mean?” She asked.

“I mean you and me. The guys. All of us,” I picked up a smooth rock and threw it at the water, making it skip a few times. “All of the stupid shit we did, all of the fun we had.”

“Of course I do.”

“I want that back,” I said, bluntly.

“Things are different now,” She said.

“So what?”

“So they can’t just go back to normal, John. No matter how much the both of us wish they could. They just can’t.”

I looked at her. “So you admit, you wish it could be like that again?”

“Yes, John,” she said, her eyes were fixated on my face, and just holding eye contact with her made my heart drop. “Things were perfect then, but we were kids. We’re just not those kids anymore. We’ve grown up, all of us. And when you grow up things change, whether you want them to or not.”

“Makenna, I miss you,” I said, for the second time this week.

She looked away. “I miss you too, John.” She lifted her knees to her chest and rested her chin on top of them. “But that doesn’t mean we should be friends.”

“Why not?” I asked.

“Like I said, things are just too different now.”

I looked at her long brown hair, framing her face. I had the sudden urge to take her face in my hands and press my lips up against hers, so I looked away. There was once a time when doing that, kissing her, was so normal. At least it was between us.

“So that’s it?” I asked, “We’re just nothing. We’re not friends. We see each other and look in different directions. Is that how it’s going to be for now on?

“I don’t know, John.” She looked at me again. The lines in her face showed me that she really didn’t know, that she was stressing over it really.

“Kenna,” I said, “Will you at least try?”

“Try what, John?”

“Try talking to me, try being my friend, try doing anything,” I said, “And if it doesn’t work, we can go back to doing this your way. Ingnoring each other. Or at least trying to.” I smirked.

She smiled a little but didn’t say anything. She just looked at me.

“Well?” I asked. “Is it a yes or a no?”

She sighed. “Fine. I’ll try.”

“Good,” I said, satisfied. I stood up and threw my shirt off over my head.

“What are you doing?” She asked, her face was full of confusion.

I laughed. “What do you think I’m doing?” I asked. She didn’t say anything, but kept the same expression and I laughed again. “I’m jumping in the lake, come on.”

“I don’t think so,” she said while I kicked my shoes off.

“Come on, Kenna,” I pressed. I launched off of the rock and into the lake below. The water felt so cool compared to the hot Arizona sun that was beating down on me a few seconds before. When I rose to the surface, Kenna was standing staring into the water at me.

“Makenna,” I said. “Come on.”

She shook her head.

“Ken?” I asked. “We’re friends right?” I smirked at her.

She threw her head back and kicked off her shoes. She looked back at me, took a breath, and jumped.