Keep Your Head Up

I try to finish my English essay on Poe as soon as possible so I could watch some tv shows after dinner, as I usually did, but even today I wasn't in the mood for it, specially because they made me angry most of the time. I closed my laptop and my mother shouted for me “Breana, dinner’s ready!”, I could smell it from upstairs, and then I realized how hungry I actually was.

Mom and Mikey both sat at the table, on their usual places, a big round plate had pasta on it and Mom was carefully pouring it on Mikey’s plate.

“Hey” Mom said looking over at me “It’s pasta with tomato sauce, your favorite.”

That one empty spot at the table was always a bother during meals, it was like an empty hole in the kitchen, and no one was ever capable of filling that hole , I guess it would feel wrong to do so.

“Have you met the new neighbors?” I asked, trying not to look much interested on the matter.
“Not really.” Mom said while spinning her fork around the pasta.
“I met Shane” Mikey said while shoving food on his tiny mouth “He’s my age and they moved from Tempe.”
“Really?” I asked “Did he say anything else?”
“His last name is O’Callaghan and he has two brothers, Ross and John, he sounded nice.”
If my weird little brother thought that boy was nice then he was. Mikey didn’t have many friends, sometimes I think I’m his best friend. The other boys don’t seem much interested about the things Mikey is involved with. After my father died he became a lot more of an introvert and that made me sad. Dad was his best friend, and I know it hurt all of us, but Mikey was Dad’s little boy, he was his little everything, he was like a mini-Dad.
“Maybe we’ll stop by tomorrow and offer them some welcome-to-the-neighborhood food” Mom said.
“I guess” I said following by Mikey’s shrug.

After dinner, I decided to grab one of the Poe’s books I was reading and went to the backyard where we had a swing set and some tables and chairs.

I carefully sit on the swing, fearing it’d break, since I didn’t sat there in a long time and it probably would be weak.

Minutes later I heard people speaking behind me, loud voices that came from all directions on the house beside mine. I wasn’t used to have neighbors this close to me. My house was in the middle of two empty houses, I never gave it much thought, but it felt like no one wanted to live next to us, and it had been like that since as long as I could remember.

The voices stopped and steps followed the silence. I tried to keep my attention on the book since the light on our backyard was dim and I had an hard time reading without my glasses, and I always forget to put them on because I only wore them in school, it had been 15 months since I got them.

A door cracked opened on the O’Callaghan’s house, I jumped out of the swing set and turned around, I looked over and someone was closing a door that went into, what I assumed to be the garage.

“Did I scare you? I’m sorry, I didn’t know how heavy the door was” The boy said looking with green eyes lingering at me from the other side of the fence that divided our properties.
“It’s okay” I said, with the book between my hands and against my chest, as in I was in some sort of shock.
“I don’t think we have properly been introduced” He stated, running his hand through his left arm, “I’m John” He reached his hand over the fence.
For a second I hesitated, it wasn’t like I was a kid and I was going to run away when a stranger reaches me his hand, I slowly walked towards him and shook his hand. It felt soft and bony, and I realized I was touching a boy and when he let go I felt a little sad and disappointed.
He was looking at me, when I realized I was staring at him without any kind of movement.
“And you are…?” He half closed his eyes and moved his head to the left, waiting for a response.
“I’m Brea.., Bree, Breana Phillips..” I was so undecided about how to introduce myself, I kind of just said a bunch of bullshit that ran out of my mouth.
“How long have you lived here? If you don’t mind me asking” His hair still looked like earlier.
“Since I was five, so that’s about 12 years of it, here, waiting” I tried to make an Harry Potter joke and then I regretted it.
“Waiting for what?” He asked, not acknowledging my reference, at least it felt like he didn’t.
“For something to happen” I balanced my weight between both of my feet and my heart was beating so fast it felt like I was going to explode, I furiously didn’t know how to talk to him and why was I making references to books, it was rather my anxiety speaking.
“Something like what?” He kept his eyes on mine and I wish he didn’t, boys made me nervous, this one was the worst.
“Like new neighbors” I said smiling, a smile that cost me my entire strength. He laughed, raising his head a little.
“Bree? Are you outside? I need you here” My mom called for me and it was just like in those movies where someone gets interrupted before a kiss or in the middle of a serious conversation, and I was having neither, it still felt like I was broken from the connection I was creating with this green eyed boy.
“I’ll be there in a second mom” I answered her “I have to go now” I stepped away from the fence “Nice to meet you John”
“Nice to meet you too Breana”

He waved goodbye and I made my way to the kitchen.