Abeyance

Jack and I stopped walking about 30 minutes later for something to eat. We walked into a supermarket and took fruit from the racks. It would be a better idea to eat the food that would expire soon first. We walked back onto 42nd street shortly after we ate.
"It's a shame over 90% of the people who would have been able to enjoy this sunny day are dead." Jack said casually, and I sighed. Jack shrugged. "More sun for us."
I shook my head. That wasn't funny.
Every person we passed dead on the ground, I looked at. What if it was Tay? Hopefully I'd find her alive and well. I wondered, maybe these people were lucky they were dead. They didn't have to go through the horrors of survival.
There was a big pile of people on the corner of 42nd street.
"I have to look for her." I told Jack, and he nodded. I showed him a picture of Tay from my wallet, he knew who I was looking for.
It was kind of disgusting actually, filtering through dead bodies, but it had to be done. At least these weren't too gory compared to some of the others. Jack took his group of people, and I took mine.
"I didn't-" Jack started, but paused when he heard me gasp. He immediately ran over to me.
"What happened?" He asked worriedly, as I looked up at him with teary eyes.
He kneeled down next to me and looked at the body I was caressing. I can tell he was confused. The description didn't match the picture of Tay I showed him. He placed his hand on my shoulder, and I broke down sobbing.
"Who is that, Kellin." He asked quietly after a few minutes of my non-stop sobbing.
"M-my... My mom..." I whimpered.
He frowned.
"It's okay, Kellin. It'll be okay."
I shook my head. "I should have cared for her more. I was too concerned about Tay... And now look..."
"You had every right to care for Tay. She was your girlfriend!"
"If I acted sooner she would have been my fiancée..." I grumbled.
He sighed. "Things happen for a reason, Kellin. I think it would be best if we just leave."
I shook my head again.
"I-I want a few minutes with her."
Jack nodded. "Understandable."
He stood up and looked around as I held my dead mother to my chest and sobbed.
"I'm sorry, mom. I love you. And I'll keep fighting. I'll keep going, all for you." I whispered, crying harder.
There was another crash. But I didn't let go.