Adventures of a Girl Named Eve!

"Can I ask why you are in this back alley with a bloody razor?" Tall, awkward looking boy questions.

"Can I ask what you are doing in this back alley with a clean razor?"

"Touche."

"Yeah."

"Secret?"

"Secret."

* * * * *

That's how I met the gangly boy with pointy elbows and knees, who spends way too much time on his hair, who talks about his brother like he is god, the boy who became my best friend.

How I met Mikey Way.
* * * * *

Our situations were strikingly similar.

Abusive and drunk rich parents who are either never home (his) or home too long (mine). The one woman who took care of us, the one person who was like a parental figure, one who actually cared, had died (my Nanny, his Grandma). He cut to escape for a bit, his brother was what kept him alive. Made him want to live.

I had nothing of the sort.

Well, maybe Mikey, but all I really wanted was for someone to love me. Me for me. And as awesome as Mikeyway was, He and I played for the same team.

And his girlfriend was gorgeous. If you catch my drift.
* * *

"Wanna come spend the next few weeks at my house? My parents will be gone for the next two months. Although there is one condition."

We were back at our alley, eating the Chinese food we had just bought. Unsanitary, but familiar.

"Sure, and what condition?"

"You don't hit on my girlfriend."

I gave him The Look. You know the one that goes along the lines of 'you have got to be fucking kidding me', yeah, that one.

"Whaaat." He whines out. "She bends both ways and talking as the only straight person in this alley, you are gorgeous and your boobs are perfect. She could totally choose you over me."

I gave him The Look again.

"Mikes, I may not be interested in what you have under your clothes, but you are pretty cute and I doubt your girlfriend would leave you for me. Besides, you stopped cutting for this girl. Your relationship is pretty serious. But, if it makes you feel better, I swear I will not use my incredible boobs to suduce your probably sexy girlfriend. Nor sabotage your relationship by telling all your dirty secrets."

"I would be more worried if I thought you actually knew my dirty secrets."

I grabbed at my chest in mock-hurt, accidently getting soy sauce from my chopsticks onto my already ragged sweatshirt.

"And here I thought that as your best friend, I would know at least a few of your deep dark and dangerous secrets."

"You know all my embarrassing childhood moments, that isn't enough for you?"

The conversation stopped for a bit as I had to help him get a noodle out of his hair.

The male gender, seriously. How do they live without us women or gay partners to help them get through life?

"As your best friend am I allowed to tell her all of your embarrassing childhood stories? Be all the-parent-we-should-have-had and be all like 'You better not break my son's heart. I will break your face. And if you get him pregnant, remember I have a gun. And he is a vigin, don't break him.' I could totally do it."

He was laughing so hard he almost spit his Mountain Dew out of his nose.

"I'm not a vigin!"

"Mikey, wet dreams don't count, darling."

"Bitch."

"Ah-a-aahhh. My name is EVE, not Bitch. I see the resemblance, but get it right. We have been friends for eight months now. You should know this."

"Just shut up, you coming to my house or not? I still have about two weeks of your clothes at my house."

I snorted. "Maybe I should just move in. I have enough clothes. I have my own pillow there, my second toothbrush, and three pairs of shoes. 'Bout I just move in?"

"Sure, you explain that to my parents."

* * * *

"Hi! I'm Alicia Simmons."

"Eve Durney."

And silence fell over our the basement bedroom. Mikey had gone upstairs to get us drinks ad snack food and pizza.

"How much does a ploar bear weigh?"

What kind of question is that?

"Uhhh..... I don't know."

"Enough to break this ice."

And it was broken, a little awkward but on our way to being friends. It was about then Mikey came back into the room.

"I don't know, Mikes. Your girlfriend's pretty hot, I might just hit on her." I winked over at Alicia in a way I am sure Mikey took as flirting but was total girl code for 'I am messing with your boyfriend who is also my best friend, no worries I don't mean it.'

Alicia and I laughed, Mikey didn't find it nearly so funny.

"Oh relax, Mikes, I was kidding. I go for blondes. And girls with smaller boobs." I stuck my tounge out at him. "Jeez."

All he did was glare.

"It's okay Mikey, I prefer your dick over her boobs anyday." Alicia crawled across the bed to where he had sat down at the end of it, and straddled his lap. They looked perfect together and I felt a bit of pride that my little awkward turtle was growing up. I said as much, but they weren't listening.

First she disses my boobs then they ignore me?

They also miss my dramatic performance of me dying of hurt in their make-out session.

For that I stole all their orange skittles.

Because everyone knows they are the best.