Kiss Me Tenderly

White.
Snow, pure white.
That’s all I saw when I opened my eyes.
I was warm all over, enveloped with an air of peace and serenity.
Where the fuck am I?
Where are my daughters?
At this, I shot straight up, sitting up. Looking around, I didn’t really see much, just movement along the edges of my vision, tinted pearly along the rims of the whorls of light. I leaned back on my hands, confused. I frowned; the ground felt fluffy, so soft, I felt as though I might fall through it.
Clouds?
Is this heaven?
Am I dead?
What the fuck is going on?
“Jacky?” an all too familiar voice called through the whiteness.
I turned to and fro violently, seeking the sound almost desperately. “Where are you? Who said that?” I looked around wildly, desperately trying to convince myself that what I was hearing wasn’t true, that it was a dream.
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, one of those rosy whorls of light started solidifying. The air surround it started to compress into something more human shaped, a long leg forming, and then the other, to complete the pair. A slender torso, dipped perfectly in the middle, just enough for arms to wrap around comfortably. Slender hands and arms, swirling black tattoos splashed across creamy tan skin. And the face. That face that made angels sing and the moon bow down to it’s beauty, framed by long caramel tresses.
Venetia.
The apparition’s smooth plush pink lips curled up in a smile.
“Jacky.” It breathed out, a smile creasing the corners of her eyes, teeth glowing between parted lips.
“Ven. Holy shit!” I exclaimed, scrambling up to my feet and rushing to close the gap.
I squeezed her close to my chest and nuzzled my face into her hair. I breathed her scent in, closing my eyes. I didn’t care if this was a joke or a dream or even a nightmare. Holding her in my arms, even for a minute was enough. My entire vocabulary turned to mush, seeming only to comprise of, why, where, how, missed you, fuck, love you, and any and all variations thereof.
She still smelled the same; like rainwater and orchids. She still felt the same, warm and alive. I could feel her giggling, the sound happily reverberating through my chest. God, she still laughed the same.
I pulled back so I could look at her. “Ven, you haven’t aged a day,” I told her happily, before drawing her back in. She resisted though, pushing me away. I looked at her, concerned.
“What?”
“Jack, you shouldn’t be here.”
“What? What do you mean I shouldn’t be here? I belong wherever you ar-”
She interrupted. “No. I mean, there’s still people down there who need and want you. Our daughters, Jack. Sassy and Missy NEED you.”
I grasped her hand and pulled it to my chest, so she could feel my heart.
“But I need you.” The whisper trailed through breeze that tousled her forever windblown tendrils.
She framed my face, a tender look in her vivid green eyes. “I know honey, I know. But there are others who love you, will come to love you. Think of what they’ll be missing out on if you stay here with me. Already, I can see hearts bursting into bloom.” She placed a kiss, a gossamer touch to my lips, before drawing away.
“Go back. Please, Jack, for me. Live for me, for the both us,” she pleaded.
I held her left hand, debating. The band of silver set with diamonds glittered on her fingers and I smiled at that.
“You kept it.”
She smiled gently up at me. “How could I ever forget it?”
The fabric of her midnight sky blue dress, studded all over with twinkling silver shifted, rustling. Looking in her eyes, she seemed to look inward, seemed to lose consciousness of what was going on in front of her for a moment. When she came to, she looked at me with wide, scared eyes.
“Please, Jacky, go. You don’t have much time left.”
I hesitated again. “What if I want to stay?”
She was ruthless in her answer. “Then you’ll never be able to see your two little girls graduate. You’ll never fall in love again. You’ll never hold your grandchildren. You’ll never grow to your full potential. You’ll have to be like me.. Sit back and watch life go on without you, which it most certainly will.”
I grabbed her face, drew her close, and kissed her. It was a deep kiss, full of longing and love, and with it, I tried conveying that I still loved her, would always love her.
“What if I never want to fall in love again.” That was a question that I had been too scared to ask myself, these past few years but I dared ask my wife?soulmate?angel? now.
She brushed my cheek with the back of her hand, tenderness evident in her every movement. “You will, sweetie. It’ll take you a while to know when you’re in love again, but you will.”
“What if I forget about you?” Another scary question.
“Honey, true love never dies, you know this. Don’t worry, you’ll see me again one day. It just won’t be as soon as you would like.” She gave -gifted- me another glowing smile, full of warmth, before she stepped back from me.
“It’s time. Go home, Jacky, go be with your little girls.”
“How do I-”
“Just close your eyes and think of them, Sassy and Missy. They’ll be your guide home. And Jack?”
I opened my eyes for a split second so I could catch her answer and a last glimpse of her, happy, healthy, and well again.
“Yeah, Ven?” My voice was shaky.
“I love you.” Those three little words, music coming from her lips. Absolute beauty.
I smiled, no, glowed from those words. “I love you, too, Ven.” were the last words to escape my lips before my eyes slipped closed.