Dysfunctional Team: Pilot

Killshot was waiting outside the med-bay. He was slouch on the wall, arms cross, trying to look badass. He was mostly failing, due to his leg; sort of put him in a awkward position with him shifting the leg to change position every few seconds. Most of the vehicons didn't notice though. They just walk past him, minding their own business. Killshot really wish that the medics would hurry up in there and treat him instead. Sure, Skywarp was in massive pain and Shockwave had been offline for a while, but his leg was really annoying him and he really wanted it fixed fast.

Killshot was considering if there was something else to do besides waiting. The base was big, so it probably had some entertainment. Maybe they had a shooting range, or better yet, a bar. That would really do good right now. Just sit back and drink some high-grade. Of course, the fact that bar being on a military was slim to none did cross his mind, it was still a worthy prospect to ask someone. Question was, who should he ask?

"Hey, loser!" Looked like someone came to instead. Killshot turn around to see a red and white jet walking towards him. The first thing Killshot notice was his scars. Honestly, he had more scars than most of the people he'd seen, but not quite the most. He personally knew a guy who got bombed three different times and still came out alive, though looking much uglier than he previous was. Judging from the scars on this unfortunate bastard, most of it came from close-corner fights with blades than explosion and gunfire like most people. Although, he did look familiar, he just couldn't remember where. He distinctly remembering him having a lot less scars than before. Immediately after that analysis, Killshot realize that the jet insulted him. That would not go unpunished.

"What do you want, slagger?" Killshot ask. If he was going to insult him, he would insult him back.

"Just wanted to know who in the pit you are, pinhead." Pinhead? Really? "I don't remember seeing you around before. Are you with that ship that came in?"

"Yeah, I'm with the ship, pit spawn." To be honest, he sort of looked liked a pit spawn. "I'm waiting for the docs in there to get done with the others so they can patch me up," he said, pointing to the part of his leg that looked like blue metal was hastily slapped on. "Got that from some… dramatic events."

"Well, you are a grounder, so it was bound to happen." Oh, slag no, did he just made fun of his alt mode. "Who else is here?"

"Well, coward," people loved to call flyers that," there's Shockwave and Skywarp in there getting patch up; Swindle, who should be talking to that Onslaught guy; and Thundercracker, who should be pushing up lugnuts." The jet looked a little surprise at that.

"Wow. A lot of heavy hitters there, right fragger?" Fragger? He can certainly do better than that.

"You can say that again, slagbag." Not the best thing he's come up with. The jet looked at him a bit, before taking again.

"You know what, limpy," Oh, great, now he was making fun of his leg, "I like you. Names Misfire. Yours?" Oh look, he was being nice. Bleh.

"Names Killshot, assassin and bodyguard. Currently working with that aft, Swindle."

"Killshot? Not exactly a subtle nomenclature." Noma- what?

"Can you say that word again. I didn't quite understand that."

"Nomenclature. Say it with me. No-men-cla-ture. It means name." Seriously. They come up with words that big just to say name. What has language come to? Now that Killshot understand what he said, he thought about it. Alright, sure, Killshot wasn't exactly subtle, but it did get the point across.

"Well, it's not exactly my real name. My other name was definitely not a name for a assassin, so I switch it. Seriously, my other name is so stupid. Speaking of subtle names, Misfire? Really?" Having a name like Misfire wasn't exactly subtle either.

"Hey, it's the name everybody gives me. I can't even remember what I was called before. Doesn't really matter now, anyway," Misfire said, shrugging his shoulders. Well, that was awkward, but that's over, now onto the important question.

"Hey, Misfire, do you know if there's a bar here or at least a place where I can get some high-grade."

"Eh, if there's a bar here, no one told me about it and I haven't seen it. Although, could a secret place run by a vehicon. I mean, looked at them. It's obvious that there's planning something, and all good planners need a good drinking spot to wash away all your sorrows when you completely failed at your plan and you become the laughing stock of the place." Killshot looked at Misfire liked he seen an insane person or at least someone who had taken some drugs.

"Tell me, are you on anything?" Killshot asked. Misfire looked insulted at that.

"Me, take drugs. Are you kidding, of course I do." Well, that explains it. "Before this whole civil war thing broke out and everybody started slaughtering each other, I live a pretty erratic lifestyle. Drugs were the name of the game."

"You were a drug enforcer?"

"Nope. I was an actor." Oh. Ohhhhhhhh. That explains a whole lot. Actors were notorious for the amount of drugs they took. Killshot looked at him again and remember exactly where he knew him from.

"Weren't you the hero of the movie, 'The Guardians of Uraitahn.' You know, the movie about this guy who went to some places and punch out some weird god-thing that really wanted to destroy the universe or something like that." Misfire looked absolutely giddy at that.

"Yes, the movie about spiritual awesomeness and kick-aft action sequences. So many cool explosions and let me tell you, the romance interest was quite wonderful in the berth."

"Yeah, cool. Whatever," Killshot interjected. "I remember that movie for awesome music playing throughout. Some seriously cool riffs were playing throughout the whole thing. The pretty explosions help too."

"Oh, yeah, the music was pretty cool too. Also, whoever played the Hallifalacious deserve goal stars for holding his high-grade. He could hold it better than anyone else. Man, that was a glorious afterparty." Misfire looked away, deep in thought, remembering the afterparty. "So much high-grade involve in that, it would've probably thrown Primus under the table."

"Good that you have fond memories," a voice behind Misfire said. Misfire hastily turned around, and met the black and red Dead End, his gold face looking at him with a face that said 'I'm dead inside and you should be too.' His purple optics looked at the two before asking the question, "May I ask why you two are standing out here?"

"Oh, I'm just here talking to my new friend," Misfire said, tipping his head towards Killshot. Dead End looked at Killshot, both giving each other the best glare they can; Dead End giving the 'We're all going to die anyway' while Killshot gave his best 'I'll kill you' glare. Misfire looked at the two, wondering who was going to back down first. Finally, Killshot spoke.

"If you're wondering why I'm here, I came to get my leg checked up. Unfortunately, the more injure personal go first while I stay out here trying to ignore the dull pain coming from my leg. It's really annoying," Killshot said, ending his motive for being here.

"Good for you, I guess," Killshot said, shrugging his shoulders before walking towards the door. "I'm heading to talk to Hook and Scavenger. Onslaught's orders."

"Why?" asked Misfire, wondering what was he doing with his therapist, no matter how crappy he was.

"They're going on a mission with me, Swindle, and Killshot," Dead End said.

"Wait, wait. Hold on. What mission am I going with you two?" Killshot asked.

"We're going to figure out who killed Thundercracker and kill him. Megatron's orders. Now, if you excuse me." Dead End walked past the two and open the door to the med-bay and walked in, door closing behind him. Killshot looked at him while he left, taking in his word. He was going after some killer with Swindle, Dead End, and two other people he didn't know. Just great.

"So, it looks like you're going on a adventure." Killshot looked at Misfire. Well, guess he was.

"Yeah, probably be better than just watching Swindle deal. It was starting to get boring and I hate it when things get boring. Solving a murder is something I've never done before, so this might be interesting."

"Man, I want to solve a murder. It be just that time I was a detective in the gritty film noir 'Seamless Clarity.' Man, that was a fun one."

"Yeah, sure whatever." Killshot looked at Misfire again before realizing something. "Hey, weren't you on that soap opera, 'At the First Sign of Rust.'" Suddenly, Misfire looked him with a monotone expression.

"If you tell anyone about," Misfire said, in the most threatening, "I will murder you in your recharge state, chop you up into pieces, and bury your body, understand?" Killshot looked at Misfire with sudden fear. He really didn't expect that from him. Why did things have to escalate quicky?

"Yeah, sure man. Whatever." Misfire looked happy at that.

"Good decision, my friend." Killshot really hated the tone in his voice. Who the heck would get upset at the fact that they were on a fragging soap opera. Yeah, sure, it was probably stupid, cheesy, and all kinds of other bad words that could be use to describe it, but was it really worth murdering someone for?

"Yeah, say, exactly what drugs are you on?" Killshot asked, in a tensed tone.

"Oh, just some circuit boosters. Keeps me nice and alert," Misfire said, looking please.

"Where do you get the drugs at? Aren't they illegal on military bases."

"Oh, I get them from our resident chemist, Mixmaster. He makes all kinds of good stuff besides circuit boosters. Of course, I owe him some things in return, but it all works out well." Misfire said. "Said, you won't be telling anybody about this, right?"

"I won't tell a single soul about this." Killshot said. Just stick it out. Soon, you'll be away from the crazy person and chasing down a killer.

The door to the med-bay open. "I'm telling you, he's coming with us." Hook said, in an annoyed tone, sounding like he said this before. "You know me Dead End. I am a artist and I don't settle for anything less than perfection."

"Yes, but-"

"No buts, it's final. Now get out before I kick you out myself." Dead End let out a sigh, knowing it was useless, before walking out, the door shutting behind him. Dead End looked at the two who had heard the conversation and approach them.

"What's up, Deady? How did Hook piss you off," Misfire said, looking at Dead End. Dead End let out a sign before answering.

"Misfire, get your stuff ready to go. You're coming with us."

"Wait, hold on. What did you just say?" Killshot ask, looking at Dead End with a bewilder expression.

"Hook is Misfire's psychologist and the only here capable of doing psychology. Since he can't leave Misfire behind, he's taking him with us, whether Onslaught likes it or not." Dead End say. Killshot looked at Misfire, who had a look of pure glee in his expression.

"You hear that, friend. We're going on a trip together. Won't this be fun?" Misfire said. Killshot looked at him, barely holding back of scream of rage.

Primus really hated him.