Status: In progress but looking for feedback. The Prologue has been trimmed! More chapters coming soon :)
Always Anyways...
Healing
My body took more abuse then even I realized. And I was bedridden for nearly 4 days with my head splitting in several pieces. I slept through the pain and the tonics they gave me were even more horrific and turned my stomach. I begged away the tonics, but soon they were poured down my throat and felt like acid. I know there were times I was not of sound mind, and heard only jumbled words and scrambled images as my brain throbbed the worst pain I have ever felt.
But there was one memory that stuck with me. It would be in the darkest of the night, and I would feel a cool slightly rough hand on my forehead. It would gently brush back my hair, rubbing my head as he whispered soothingly to me. But the voice did not stay in my memories, and my eyes could not seem to focus on who was in front of me. I remember begging for my old Lord, my heart's stubborn love, begging for him to come to my side. But those pleas went unanswered, and I was just soothed more. The gentleness of the touch would be enough to ease me back to sleep and in the morning, the darkened stranger would be gone.
Finally my body recovered, and my head's pain subsided enough that the tonics were no longer necessary. Finally I was able to keep down food inside me. But rest was not to come for me easily, because as soon as I was able, Lord Tiernan was standing at my bedside. "Lady Snow Fox, I must ask your assistance of a very important matter. We have not been able to locate one of the guards who was on duty and allowed this terrible accident to take place. I have searched for him, but no one seems to have the record of who else was on duty that night. But there were 3 outside that chamber door. The other guards admitted this before they were tortured and hung. They both blamed him for allowing you into such danger so it is important he is found." I blinked back at Lord Tiernan and I saw the darkness in his eyes. The thought of him torturing and killing his own guards made me immediately feel sick in my stomach. He did not hesitate, "You spoke with him....tell me his name Lady Snow Fox." I shook my head, "I did not know him. I know none of the guards for you have forbid them to speak with me." He nodded frustrated, "Exactly, so he allowed this accident to occur and deserves to be punished the most of all. Tell me his name Lady." I shook my head once again, "I cannot tell you...I do not know."
He folded his arms frustrated with me, and I could see other captains waiting in my doorway for the first indication I would give them. "Then a description Lady. What did he appear like?" I swallowed and looked over at my loyal maid who has been tending me by Lord Gannon instructions all this time. "I cannot remember. My mind has been greatly injured from the throw...." my voice faltered as I saw Lord Tiernan's hands clench, "...from the accident. All I remember was his royal armour." He looked back at his captains and they looked at him. One stepped inside my chamber and even the air about him made me revolt in fear. I shifted away from him as he stopped at my bedside, and placed his arm over mine, "Surely you remember something." His cold stare terrified me and for the first time I was feeling threatened. He started to squeeze my arm a little when I wouldn't answer, and I whimpered, "Please, you are hurting me." He didn't break his gaze and I refused to answer. "I cannot remember. The entire night is a blur to me." Only then did the captain finally remove his arm.
He turned back to my Lord, "Perhaps if we brought them in, she might remember more." Lord Tiernan nodded and before I could even ask, 8 men who fit similar descriptions of Lord Gannon were brought in, beaten and bound in chains. I scrambled back in bed afraid and my maid rushed to my side to comfort me. "The Princess is in a very delicate position, my Lord." Lord Tiernan narrowed his eyes at her, "Then she should would be wise to remember and make this quick." My maid held me tight as I looked at these terrified tortured men. I did my best to pretend I was truly looking for the man, but I finally shook my head, "None of them are the right guard. These are too tall...he is too young. This one has brown eyes...." My voice trailed off when I realized I revealed more then I should have. Lord Tiernan was at my bedside in a flash, "Then you do remember something Princess." I looked up at him timidly, "I remember they were not dark eyes, nothing more." His teeth gritted, "None of these men are right....not a single one?" I shook my head, "They are all innocent, please release them." Lord Tiernan was not happy with his results and motioned for the men to be removed. I heard a few of them thank me for proclaiming their innocent before my chamber door was slammed behind the guards. My maid told me later, that every single one of them were hanged anyway, just for being near the description of Lord Gannon. Upon hearing the news, I sobbed. My maid did her best to calm me, but my body finally me into a deep sleep for the night.
Again in the darkness, the soothing hand rubbed my head softly. Again it whispered to me in words I cannot recall in my sleepiness. I always brings me such comfort that this time, I remember whispering for the presence to stay and not leave me. I remember enough of the reply, "Not tonight my Princess but know you are safe. Sleep now and rest in peace knowing we watch you always." I forced myself to move and the hand withdrew before I could touch it. As I turned, I could only see the door close without a sign of my angel in the darkness. For a moment, my mind was reminded of my old Lord, my heart's love. How he would visit in the dark and comfort me. I found myself longing for such a true touch once again, even when it was only from such a dark and kind stranger. I felt weak and my heart ached instead of my head. I laid back down and this time slept through the night without anymore presences but my maid.
By the end of the week I was back on my feet and finally was able to visit my Lady Ruth. Our reunion was bittersweet as we both clung to each other and cried. She whispered in my ear nearly a thousand thank yous, as we just held each other tightly. She was more then my Lady to me now, she was a true friend. Someone I was determined to see removed from the place she found herself held such prisoner. That night, I rubbed her head as she drifted to sleep before returning to my own chamber feeling my body ache. I wished for my angel in the darkness to come, but that night he did not. Nor the night after. It seemed now that I was healed I was no longer in need of my angel of darkness. But there was a piece of me that deeply missed his presence. A kind and gentle presence in my life.
What I used to have with my old Lord....that ended up only a lie....yet again I am left with only dreams.
You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while
and all my fragile strength is gone.
But there was one memory that stuck with me. It would be in the darkest of the night, and I would feel a cool slightly rough hand on my forehead. It would gently brush back my hair, rubbing my head as he whispered soothingly to me. But the voice did not stay in my memories, and my eyes could not seem to focus on who was in front of me. I remember begging for my old Lord, my heart's stubborn love, begging for him to come to my side. But those pleas went unanswered, and I was just soothed more. The gentleness of the touch would be enough to ease me back to sleep and in the morning, the darkened stranger would be gone.
Finally my body recovered, and my head's pain subsided enough that the tonics were no longer necessary. Finally I was able to keep down food inside me. But rest was not to come for me easily, because as soon as I was able, Lord Tiernan was standing at my bedside. "Lady Snow Fox, I must ask your assistance of a very important matter. We have not been able to locate one of the guards who was on duty and allowed this terrible accident to take place. I have searched for him, but no one seems to have the record of who else was on duty that night. But there were 3 outside that chamber door. The other guards admitted this before they were tortured and hung. They both blamed him for allowing you into such danger so it is important he is found." I blinked back at Lord Tiernan and I saw the darkness in his eyes. The thought of him torturing and killing his own guards made me immediately feel sick in my stomach. He did not hesitate, "You spoke with him....tell me his name Lady Snow Fox." I shook my head, "I did not know him. I know none of the guards for you have forbid them to speak with me." He nodded frustrated, "Exactly, so he allowed this accident to occur and deserves to be punished the most of all. Tell me his name Lady." I shook my head once again, "I cannot tell you...I do not know."
He folded his arms frustrated with me, and I could see other captains waiting in my doorway for the first indication I would give them. "Then a description Lady. What did he appear like?" I swallowed and looked over at my loyal maid who has been tending me by Lord Gannon instructions all this time. "I cannot remember. My mind has been greatly injured from the throw...." my voice faltered as I saw Lord Tiernan's hands clench, "...from the accident. All I remember was his royal armour." He looked back at his captains and they looked at him. One stepped inside my chamber and even the air about him made me revolt in fear. I shifted away from him as he stopped at my bedside, and placed his arm over mine, "Surely you remember something." His cold stare terrified me and for the first time I was feeling threatened. He started to squeeze my arm a little when I wouldn't answer, and I whimpered, "Please, you are hurting me." He didn't break his gaze and I refused to answer. "I cannot remember. The entire night is a blur to me." Only then did the captain finally remove his arm.
He turned back to my Lord, "Perhaps if we brought them in, she might remember more." Lord Tiernan nodded and before I could even ask, 8 men who fit similar descriptions of Lord Gannon were brought in, beaten and bound in chains. I scrambled back in bed afraid and my maid rushed to my side to comfort me. "The Princess is in a very delicate position, my Lord." Lord Tiernan narrowed his eyes at her, "Then she should would be wise to remember and make this quick." My maid held me tight as I looked at these terrified tortured men. I did my best to pretend I was truly looking for the man, but I finally shook my head, "None of them are the right guard. These are too tall...he is too young. This one has brown eyes...." My voice trailed off when I realized I revealed more then I should have. Lord Tiernan was at my bedside in a flash, "Then you do remember something Princess." I looked up at him timidly, "I remember they were not dark eyes, nothing more." His teeth gritted, "None of these men are right....not a single one?" I shook my head, "They are all innocent, please release them." Lord Tiernan was not happy with his results and motioned for the men to be removed. I heard a few of them thank me for proclaiming their innocent before my chamber door was slammed behind the guards. My maid told me later, that every single one of them were hanged anyway, just for being near the description of Lord Gannon. Upon hearing the news, I sobbed. My maid did her best to calm me, but my body finally me into a deep sleep for the night.
Again in the darkness, the soothing hand rubbed my head softly. Again it whispered to me in words I cannot recall in my sleepiness. I always brings me such comfort that this time, I remember whispering for the presence to stay and not leave me. I remember enough of the reply, "Not tonight my Princess but know you are safe. Sleep now and rest in peace knowing we watch you always." I forced myself to move and the hand withdrew before I could touch it. As I turned, I could only see the door close without a sign of my angel in the darkness. For a moment, my mind was reminded of my old Lord, my heart's love. How he would visit in the dark and comfort me. I found myself longing for such a true touch once again, even when it was only from such a dark and kind stranger. I felt weak and my heart ached instead of my head. I laid back down and this time slept through the night without anymore presences but my maid.
By the end of the week I was back on my feet and finally was able to visit my Lady Ruth. Our reunion was bittersweet as we both clung to each other and cried. She whispered in my ear nearly a thousand thank yous, as we just held each other tightly. She was more then my Lady to me now, she was a true friend. Someone I was determined to see removed from the place she found herself held such prisoner. That night, I rubbed her head as she drifted to sleep before returning to my own chamber feeling my body ache. I wished for my angel in the darkness to come, but that night he did not. Nor the night after. It seemed now that I was healed I was no longer in need of my angel of darkness. But there was a piece of me that deeply missed his presence. A kind and gentle presence in my life.
What I used to have with my old Lord....that ended up only a lie....yet again I am left with only dreams.
You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while
and all my fragile strength is gone.