Grade 8

A month was not nearly long enough for Lena to get over what happened with Harry and yet her she was about to walk off a plane. She should be ecstatic to be in a new country but all she could think about was the last time she had seen him. She didn't know if anything had changed since then, it hadn't for her, and the anxiety of it all was starting to get to her. It was fairly warm in Australia as their winter was coming to an end and Lena only hoped she wouldn't have to wear shorts around the boys. There was something she wouldn't be able to keep from them if it got to be to hot out.

She got in a car that would take her directly to the venue where she would do soundcheck before the first show later that night. It was an intense case of déjà vu the nerves she had felt when arriving at a similar venue two months before resurfacing. At least this time she knew what she was going into. Inside the arena she navigated the halls, Lucy in her case held tightly in her hand, until she found the stage since she was already running late for soundcheck she futures it should be the first place she went. As she walked nearer to the stage she heard music already being played male voices she had never heard before laughing. She stopped as the stage came into view four boys she had never seen before singing, playing guitars and bass, and one on the drums. They didn't sound half bad. She looked away from them to see Paul standing by the stage watching them with yet another person she had never met. Things really can change in a month.

"Paul!" She exclaimed when she was close enough to be heard.

Paul turned around with a smile arms opened wide. "Lena, there you are!"

He pulled her into a tight hug which she happily returned. "How are you?" She asked when they let each other go.

"I'm good." Paul replied with a nod. "I got your email about the new set list. Are you going to be able to do it tonight?"

"Yeah I should be fine." Lena shrugged. "There isn't much that needs to be changed. We can keep the lighting the same as before except for the final song, I only want a spot light on me."

"Alright." Paul glanced up at the stage where the four boys were now putting their instruments away. "Let me introduce you to the lads."

Paul waved the boys down, they reminded her a bit of those five boys she had grown so close to. "Lena, meet 5 Seconds of Summer. They'll be coming on after you every night."

A boy with a mop of hair atop his head stepped forward first. "Hiya! I'm Ashton!"

Before Lena could react, his toned arms wrapped around her in a big bear hug. She hesitantly hugged back, which earned her a slight chuckle. Ashton stepped back just a couple seconds later, a goofy grin on his face.

"Calum."A deep voice said. Lena looked to Ashton's right, seeing a very tanned, handsome boy. Lena unsuccessfully held back a smirk that only matched his.

Lena noticed a handsome face topped with a mess of blonde hair was peaking out behind Calum's shoulder. Sparkling blue eyes met hers and she could see his lips lift in a smile. "Hi, I'm Luke." He said, waving slightly.

"Hi." A voice said a little ways away. A boy with wild white blonde hair, stepped out from the wall and waved. He had dull green eyes and a smile tugging at his handsome features. "Michael."

"We looked you up last night." Ashton said his smile as wide as ever.

"You make that sound so creepy." Michael shook his head. "It's really not that creepy."

"We think you're fuckin' awesome." Luke told her with a shy smile.

"Why don't you get up there and show them how awesome you are?" Paul gestured to the stage. "We don't have that much time."

"Right." Lena walked around the 5 Seconds of Summer boys.

"Mind if we watch?" Ashton asked already sitting down in a chair.

"Not at all. You can tell me if its shit."

Lena walked on to the stage with Lucy where she handed the acoustic guitar to a guitar tech. Taking an electric guitar from him; the electric guitar she had specifically asked for for the new set list. She stood in front of the mic that had been placed there for her a purple star on the top of it marking it as her own. She strummed her guitar the sound bouncing off the walls. Her first song was Low opening up with the fast song to wake every one up. The Australian boys loved it shouting and jamming out to her song.

Next she played a new song transitioning into it from Low. "Tell me where our time went and if it was time well spent. Just don't let me fall asleep feeling empty again. 'Cause I fear I might break and I fear I can't take it. Tonight I'll lie awake feeling empty. I can feel the pressure it's getting closer now; we're better off without you."

Lena noticed the crew taking seats around the arena to watch her perform her mini show. In the very back she was sure she saw those five boys she had been avoiding every phone call and text from. If anything knowing Harry was there made her preform better.

"I can feel the pressure it's getting closer now. You're better off without me." She looked up eyes catching those green ones.

"How's it going?" She asked the small crowd of stand in fans. She was met with loud yells from both bands and crew. She felt silly talking to them like this but she knew she had to do the talking bits to get it all right. "You guys are awesome!"

"Fuck yeah!" From the Australians of course.

She continued her normal routine of talking and pumping up the crowd for the two bands coming on after her. She sang Make Me Fall next crediting Niall as the co-writer before hand earning a loud cheer from the Irishman. Just Before Goodbye was up next before she exchanged her electric guitar for Lucy plugging it in to her foot peddle.

"So this next song is called Your Biggest Fan, I'm pretty proud of this one." She laughed into the mic suddenly more excited to play the song with her muse watching. "I'm a real big fan of yours but in quite the joke to you. But boy it wasn't a joke when you kissed me in your room, and replied "I love you too". I'm a little bit insecure from all of these mistreatment's but see I'm working it out, and working it out is so damn hard when you're alone."

These songs were inspired by one person she had practically forgot all the songs she had written before she had met him. She had never met someone who brought so much out of her; so many emotions and situations she never thought she'd be in. The album almost should be named after him.

"I am running out of words to say to you. Wondering why I'm wasting my time thinking back and wonderin' why I'm such a fool for loving you." She glanced back up at Harry barely making him out. "And I get to the point where all I wanted was for us to make up, but it's not the easy. 'Cause boy you move on so quickly. Keepin' a girl like me on the edge of her seat. And I know everything you do is all about your perfect image. Well I hope this song it helps your image. I'm so over you, now."

She sang the chorus again before letting Lucy hang from her back. She clapped into her loop peddle mic layering it on top of the guitar she had recorded onto it. "And I was the one who thought I was strong well you proved me wrong, and I'm singing along to all the songs on the radio. I don't wanna go, c'mon baby, tell me something I wanna know. And I don't wanna see what is on my mind 'cause slack of motivation is taking over my time and I'm sick of trying." She sang faster then before earning loud cheers then as she got to the last song she brought Lucy back finishing the song with the chorus one last time.

"I only have two more songs then those super sexy Aussie's will be rockin' your world!" She winked at them. "I'm sure you've all heard this one since it is sung by the one and only Miss Taylor Swift and Britain's sexy ginger Ed Sheeran. This is Everything Has Changed."

When she was making the decision on the song she would be converting she knew it had to be one the crowd would recognize since the last song was one no one had heard of, Smile in Your Sleep by Silverstein, so made a conscious decision to find one that was playing on the radio currently.

Without any thought she made the smooth transition into her final song. "I hate you, don't leave me. I feel like I can't breath. Just hold me." Using the guitar as her mood setter she kept it sounding raw ditching the foot peddle for the time being. "Don't touch me. And I want you to love me but I need you to trust me. Stay with me. Set me free. But I can't back down no, I can't deny that I'm staying now 'cause I can't decide confused and scared I am terrified of you."

A single spot light on her was the only lights she wanted during this last song. She gave the lighting people free reign of the lights for the rest of the songs but this one was different.

"I admit I'm in and out of my head don't listen to a single word I've said. Just hear me out before you run away. 'Cause I can't take this pain. I hate you, don't leave me. I hate you don't leave me, 'cause I love when you kiss me. I'm in pieces you, complete me. No, I can't back done no I can't deny that I'm staying now 'cause I can't decide. Confused and scared I am terrified of you."

The arena was quiet as she hit the chorus again everyone captured by her. "I'm addicted to the madness I'm a daughter of the sadness. I've been here too many times before. Been abandoned and I'm scared now I any handle another fall out. In fragile, just washed upon the shore. They forget me, don't see me, when they love me they leave me." A final go at the chorus and she was done with the song. "Thank you."

The lights came back on as cheers erupted from the people who had sat down to watch her mini show. She smiled at them feeling slightly overwhelmed. If this was just the reaction she was getting from them she couldn't wait to play in front of a packed arena.



Lena walked into the catering room finding it empty expect for Zayn who was sitting at a table picking at some fruit. She grabbed her own bowl of grapes before taking a seat across from him. Zayn looked up to give her a small smile and Lena instantly knew something was up.

"How's it going?" Lena asked.

"Fine." He shrugged, his eyes gave away that he was not fine. After a disbelieving look from Lena he sighed. "I broke up with Alexis."

"You did?" Lena asked surprised. "Why?"

"Same reason you broke up with Harry."

"Oh." They were silent then. Lena wasn't remotely ready to discuss her and Harry's break up, if that's even what it was; and Alexis was another touchy subject. "I'm sorry."

"Me too."

"Wanna talk about it?" Lena asked quietly.

"Nope. You?"

"Not at all."

Lena thought that was the end of it but Zayn opened his mouth needing someone who understood what was going on to talk to. "I couldn't do it anymore."

"What?" Lena asked surprised. "Do what?"

"Be with her." Zayn shrugged. "I'm trying to stay sober and she's out partying, and sleeping with other guys. Besides it was obvious how she felt about Harry."

"I thought you were going to ignore the cheating?"

"I couldn't anymore." Zayn sighed. "I love her but right now being in a relationship isn't working. Maybe we'll get back together but I doubt it."

"I'm sorry." Lena said again. "I know it must be hard right now."

"We were best friends I think that's what hurts the most." Zayn shook his head.

The door opened with a loud creak startling Zayn and Lena. Harry walked in stopping when his eyes landed on Lena.

"We need to talk." Nothing about his tone made Lena want to talk to him.

"I gotta go." Zayn awkwardly stood up leaving the room in a hurry.

Harry walked closer to Lena as she stood up ready to make a run for it. "You can't run from me. We still have the rest of the tour together so we might as well do this now."

"What do you want from me Harry?"

"I want you to stop trying to run from everything." Harry's voice was strong a complete contrast to how he was feeling. "I still want to be with you and I know you want to be with me. Alexis isn't a problem anymore. So just stop being stubborn and let's try this again."

"I can't do that Harry." Lena shook her head jaw clenching tight. "I don't feel that way." She hoped her words were convincing because it felt like she was falling apart on the inside; at any moment she felt like she would crumble to the ground.

"Stop lying." Harry demanded a new emotion taking over his eyes, their normal brightness gone replaced with a sadness Lena couldn't bare to see.

"I'm not lying."

Harry was quiet his heat racing and chest falling rapidly like he had been running too hard. He didn't want to believe her. He couldn't believe her not after everything they went through.

"I don't think there's anything to talk about."

For the second time Harry let her walk away. Only this time he didn't watch as she left he followed her determined to win her back. She walked into the hall and without any care that there were people running around getting ready for the show he called out to her.

"Lena you can't run away from everything!"

Lena stopped turning to look at him over her shoulder. "There isn't anything worth staying for."

She continued walked to her dressing room while Harry stood in his spot fuming. He hadn't meant to get worked up but after hearing the songs she would be playing for his fans had him seeing red.

"Don't think that's gonna help things mate."

Harry rounded on the person behind him ready to take their heads off. "Fuck off."

"Only trying to help." Zayn shrugged.

Harry rubbed a hand over his eyes. "I'm sorry."

"Whatever." Zayn shrugged again. "Wanna come outside with me?"

Harry gave him a nod. "Yeah alright."