Obsessed With the Thought of You

"Oh that's right," George turns his smirk towards me. "He was your brother right? Caroline 'Bones' Erlichman. Tell me, does it still hurt your pride to know your brother was an idiot?"

"You son of a whore!" I yell and fling myself at him punching him in the face and slapping him. He makes a noise of pain and tries to hold me at a distance. I then feel myself being pulled away and look to see it is Jorel who is grabbing me.

I glare up at him and struggle to get out of his grasp. "Calm down," he looks down at me. "And you George," he says with an acid tone. "That's enough. Only cockroaches prey on the deceased, have some respect for the dead and yourself."

George looks at me angrily as he clutches his cheek. "Fine. I won't mention him again."

"You better fuckin' not or you'll be sharkbait," I yell and struggle more frantically as I try to scratch at him but Jorel's grip is too tight.

"Alright, alright," Dylan speaks up and steps close to us. "Let her go. Cat, chill the fuck out and you," he says and looks towards George. He then stands right in front of George and I see him cup his crotch and squeeze hard, making George gasp and shut his eyes tightly. "If you ever talk about him again, I will rip you limb from limb and feed your body parts to rabid dogs, savvy?"

George nods as he clenches his teeth through the pain and Dylan lets him go. "Bones, Cutthroat, we're leaving," he says in a cold tone. "It was nice to meet you ma'am," he nods towards Ada who gives a small wave, still standing there stunned, obviously not knowing much of our history.

Jorel lets me go and gives me a lingering look before I shake my head and catch up with Dylan and Jordan. When I am by their sides I look over my shoulder to see George clutching himself, Matt laughing, Ada asking questions and Jorel with a smirk on his face.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me," I sing mumbling as I sit at the bar, while Dylan and Jordan are off with some maidens. "We pillage plunder, we rifle and loot. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho," I sing as I play with a beer mat.

I let out a sigh as I look behind the bar to see the barman talking to a whore and the barwomen leaning over the counter to flash their cleavage, trying to get some business, while they pour drinks.

"We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot," I continue to sing as I look into my half filled glass of ale.

"Drink up me 'earties, yo ho," I hear another voice sing along with me and I stop to look to my side to see Jorel smirking at me.

"Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me," he goes on as he sits beside me. I tense up immediately and look back at my glass. "That song's one of the greatest shanties out there," he comments and I shift in my seat.

"Well you were all mouth earlier," he says nudging me. "Squid got your tongue?"
"I only talk to scoundrels if I must. Just leave me be sir," I reply.

"I'm not doing you any harm," he says and I look up to see him smiling warmly at me. "Just seemed like you were a bit lonely so I thought I would help you out."

"I don't need company from the likes of you," I say as I look away from him again.
"Well now it seems you've obviously heard some untruths about me, Caroline," he says.

"Don't call me that," I say harshly snapping my gaze towards him. "Only my parents called me Caroline. To everyone else it's my nickname or my pirate name."

"Ah yes, your nickname, we mustn't forget that one. Cat, was it?" He asks and I nod. "I never did understand how you got Cat from Caroline but then women are very complex creatures."

"I don't know which question plagues my mind the most," I begin as I turn my body towards him. "Either: how do you know so much about me or why are you sat with me?"

"Both very intriguing questions," he says nodding. "My answer is the same for both: I have my reasons."

"Care to elaborate on those reasons?" I respond.
"All in good time m'lady," he smiles and I shake my head as I take a swig of my beer.

"Not found a whore you like yet? Why aren't you off upstairs somewhere?" I enquire, realising he won't answer my previous questions even if I push further so I ask something else.

"I don't fornicate with whores," he replies simply. "I prefer finer things in life," he says watching me closely as I continue to fidget under his stare.

I think about what he has just said. "Oh," I say in realisation. "So that's who that lady was. She's you girlfriend?"

"Who? Ada?" He furrows his eyebrows at me. "God no. She's a childhood friend. That would be as weird as sleeping with my own mother."

"Well I wouldn’t put that past you," I mumble.
"Hey!" He says sharply. "Whatever Disgruntled and Cutthroat have told you; it's probably mostly not true."

"Right," I scoff.
"I mean it. They don't know the real me, only the me who does things I have to," he explains.

"And what does that mean?" I question.
"It means that the things I have done that have made them dislike me and see me as a bastard are only the things I had to do for the best interest of my crew," he says.

"So you're a nice guy who does bad things for the benefit of your men?" I sum up.
"Exactly," he says. "I have to put my crew first, that's what being a good captain is about."

I nod. "So if she isn't your girlfriend and you don't see prostitutes, are you a pansy pirate or do you have a wife tucked up in your ship too?"

"No," he says and asks for some Ale when the barman walks past. "I dare say it would be Cutthroat who was the pansy pirate if any of us were. I don't have a problem with all that but I'm as straight as the pirate code."

"Then what do you do to meet your primal needs?" I ask and he smirks.
"Why are you so interested?" He retorts.

"Because I live with about a hundred men on that ship and I know when they begin to get frustrated. I know how mean they can get, so to let yourself get to that state purposely is crazy," I say with no hint of shame or coyness at my blunt inquisition.

"Well I just wait for girls to come along who are nice and clean," he replies with a shrug.

"You must wait around for long whiles," I say.
"Yes but the nice girls are worth the wait," he smiles and takes a generous gulp of the beer he is handed.

"What are you doing here then?" I ask.
"Making sure my men don't cause too much of a fuss," he explains. "They sometimes have too good of a time and get a bit too rowdy."

"Oh," I nod and have some more of my drink. "I'm waiting for my boys to finish so I can go to bed."

"Why can't you go to bed now?" He looks at me questionably.
"I'm not allowed to go anywhere by myself or stay on the ship by myself unless one of them is with me," I explain.

"Why?" He asks. "I mean I understand why you can't walk around by yourself, it's dangerous, but you're not even allowed to stay on the Gallow's Tears by yourself?"

"No," I say. "Although Dylan loves his crew, he doesn’t trust them when they're drunk so he worries that I may be attacked if I'm left alone."

Jorel nods. "A wise, cautious man. You can't trust anyone when it comes down to it. Even the pirates' code makes us bastards what with one of the rules stating clearly that he who falls-"

"Behind shall be left behind," I join in to finish the sentence as I know the code just as well as he does.

"So not the most trustworthy men out there," he gives me a smile and I sigh.
"It's been a long day," I say with a yawn.

"Why don’t I take you back?" He offers.
"I told you I'm not allowed to be left unattended on the ship," I say.

"Well I will stay with you," he says.
"If they found you on the Gallow's Tears, they will hang you up on the topsails quicker than you can say Jolly-Roger," I reply.

"Then come back to my cabin," he says and I look at him like he's crazy.
"Captain J, I don't understand why you're acting this way. We're sworn enemies-" I say and cut myself off.

I sit up straighter and gain a distrusting look on my face and he scrunches his own up in confusion. "What? Whats wrong Cat?" He asks me.

"You're trying to trick me. You're trying to get me somewhere private so you can take me hostage or use me for ransom," I accuse.

"I think the sea air has gotten to you, I'm just trying to help," he says with a laugh.
"Help me? Why? Don't be ridiculous," I say and stand up. "You're planning something. I know it," I indict him further and he looks astounded.

"What the fuck are you doing with Bones?" I hear behind me and see Jordan has come downstairs. He pulls me behind him and holds my hand. "What are you trying to do? Corner her so you can steal her?"

Jorel sighs and stands up with us. "Like I was going to say to Cat, if I wanted to take her hostage, why would I have been sat here talking to her for so long? If I wanted to kidnap her I could have done it in a second, no one would care or pay attention."

I look around me to see everyone engrossed in something or each other and realise that he very easily could have just seized me and I would have been powerless to stop him.

"You're no one to be trusted," Jordan spits. "You're up to something Bloodbath."
"Cutthroat you really must put more faith in humanity," Jorel smirks and I see Dylan begin to descend the stairs with his arm around a girl who is smirking.

I breathe a sigh of relief and tug at Jordan's hand. "Dylan's ready, can we leave please?" I say into his ear and he nods, never letting his hard stare leave Jorel.

"Run along," Jorel smirks and Jordan growls and gets in Jorel's face.
"This isn't over Bloodbath," he says before beginning to storm off pulling me along with him.

We reach Dylan at the bottom of the stairs and Jordan nods his head towards the bar. Dylan looks over and his relaxed expression turns to a stone cold one. "Let's go," he mutters and we make our way back to the ship.

That night as I lay in my bunk trying to sleep, I heard Jordan and Dylan talking about the Bloodbath crew. I could tell they were wondering why Jorel had taken such an interest in me and if he was up to something.

The last thing I remember before I fell asleep was them agreeing that they would make me promise to avoid him and his men at all costs. Then they said that we would set sail as soon as light struck the following morning.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"So much for our picnic," I sigh the next morning as I watch the port get smaller and small as we sail away from land.

"We're sorry Bones," Jordan says behind me and places a hand on my hip. I turn to him with a sad face and look down when I can't bring myself to muster up a smile. "Come here," he says and hugs me to his chest.

"I'm sorry I'm so miserable all the time Jordan," I say over his shoulder as my chin leans on it.

"So are we. It kills us to see you so unhappy," he says and pulls away to look at me. "But there's nowhere for you to go Bones."

"I know, I know," I say and walk away to lean on the fence around the ships perimeter and look at the waves. "I have no family, no friends besides you guys and no assets to my name. I have nothing to go or turn to. So I must stay."

He doesn't respond and I know it's because he doesn’t know what to say. A part of me feels so selfish for acting so ungratefully. They take care of me and give me shelter for nothing and I'm complaining about it. But then the self-centred part of me says screw it, I'm allowed to be sad if I want to.

I hear him sigh behind me and then Dylan speaks to him before he goes off to tend to a duty. "You know we don't find any pleasure in you being bored and upset," he tells me showing sympathy.

I turn to him and sigh again looking at the deck-floor. "Sir I know I'm being unfair and selfish when I complain. I realise and appreciate how spoilt and cared for I am, but today," I pause and look up at him to see him looking at me with concern.

"Today I just need to be sad and feel sorry for myself. So I will stay out of your way so as to not burden you," I finish.

"You're never a burden," he says and I smile with a small laugh.
"I am forever a burden," I tell him. "I thank you for everything and you have enough to deal with on a daily basis so I shan't get in your way. I'll be in my quarters today."

He nods after listening to me speak. "Ok Cat, if that's what you think is best. I'll have someone retrieve you when it's supper time."

I smile at him and leave to go back to my cabin. When I get there I look at the dead daisy chain I didn’t get to replace that I have kept on my window sill, a hole in the wooden wall.

I think about what Captain Dylan said to me the other day about how there aren't many female pirates around. I laugh despite myself shaking my head at the irony of the fact that the only one we find in a long, long time is a part of the crew of our enemies.

My smile turns into a frown as go back to feeling sorry for myself. What makes it sting even more is that she seemed really nice and as though she had a sense of humour. I tut to myself thinking she'd be perfect for a friend on the Gallow's Tears but there's no chance that could happen.

We’d have to kidnap her or something but Caption J Bloodbath would never stand for that. It'd be like waging war on them. I decide to try taking a nap so the day will go by quicker. Some time later I wake up to knocking on my door.

I stretch on my way to the door and I open it to see one of the crewmen, Black Bart, and I smile. "Suppers ready ma'am. The captain and the first mate are waiting in the captain's lounge for you," he tells me.

"Thanks Bart," I say as we walk up to the next floor. He escorts me to the lounge and opens the door for me. I thank him again and walk in, taking my usual seat at the table.

"Did you have a good afternoon?" Jordan asks me.
"I slept," I reply and smell the food on the table with a smile.

"I think the men missed having you walk around deck," Dylan smirks at me as he leans back in his chair at the head of the table. "They missed seeing the smile that’s warms everyone to the bone."

"That's a stupid pirate name," I mumble commenting on my name and shaking my head as I stab my fork into the food on my plate. "What a stupid tagline."

"Well you do have a very warming smile. So it's appropriate," Jordan tells me as he grabs a bread roll. "Who cares if it's stupid. Loads of pirate names are stupid. You know I met a guy in that whorehouse called Wellgrown Willie? Now that's a stupid fuckin' name."

Dylan and me laugh along with him as we tuck into our meal. A short while later there's a knock at the door and Dylan summons them in. Another crewmember enters and explains that the lookouts saw what looked like another pirate ship.

"Saw? So you can't see it now?" Dylan asks.
"Aye Cap'n," the man nods. "That ship bloomin' disappeared off the face of the sea."

"It disappeared?" Jordan asks.
"We saw it from a far, you see sirs," he starts. "It must have been sailing away from us and so we couldn't see it after it got to a point."

Dylan nods. "Could you see what flag it had in the telescopes?"
"It didn’t look like friendly flags, sir," the man shakes his head. "That's why we boys wanted to tell you. Trouble may be a foot but, like I said, it seemed to be sailing away."

"Good, good," Dylan nods. "Ok, well keep a meticulous look out. Tell the lads to report any more sightings. Make sure to find out what that flag is. If it is a foe ship, I want to know about it as soon as possible."

"Also try to see if it's a cargo ship," Jordan joins in. "We could be on our way to getting some good supplies if it is."

"Of course, sirs," the man says. "We'll tell you the second we have any more news. Sorry again for disturbing you."

"Not at all lad," Dylan gives him a warm smile, always the gentle, calm and friendly leader. "The bread is good tonight. Make sure to grab a couple rolls when you're shift ends and you get your dinner."

"That I will Cap'n," he smiles. "That I will. Enjoy your supper," he says and leaves, shutting the door behind him.

"What do you think it was?" Jordan asks Dylan who shrugs.
"Hopefully it was a cargo ship and we can get some decent supplies that we couldn't get while we were on land yesterday," Dylan replies.

"Oh yeah, about that," Jordan says and looks at me. "Bones we were talkin' and were wondering if you'd like to join us for a picnic up on deck tomorrow afternoon. The boys say the sky looks like it'll be a fine day."

I look at them both and smile. "You two are such gentlemen to me," I smile. "I would be honoured to join you."

"Excellent," Dylan grins. "Be sure to tell Sharktooth Barney what food you want for it," he says talking about our ship's head chef.