Bloodlet

Ruby wasn’t sure how to get Sam and Dean to trust her completely… She was, after all, a black-eyed freak. A freak… She could still hear her human companions’ voices in her head. In this new body, the black-haired, shorter body, Ruby felt even more sinister than her previous one. At least that one looked innocent… blonde, fair, beautiful in the most traditional sense. This one, this one was all sex and red and hard curves. Her lips were sensuously big--she was a bit embarrassed by it. They were so sexual without her even trying… and her dark eyes, the brown instead of black, somehow were much steamier. The cheekbones she could handle. But the long dark hair was too much. She pretended not to like the body… she tried her hardest. And yet, here she was, admiring untrustworthy, much-too-beautiful new vessel. What would Sam think? Ruby bit her full, red lip and watched her muscles tauten in the mirror of the dingy hotel. The carpet was odd and damp beneath her bare feet, cool and much different than what she was used to.
The door opened, shocking Ruby out of her dazed gaze at herself. She spun around to look at Sam as he came in the door with some food for himself. She’d assured him that she didn’t need to eat after his protests. He glanced at her from under his eyebrows that way he does, his blue eyes flickering over her. Ruby smirked, that evil inside of her loving that he could hardly control himself. As per usual, Ruby wasn’t wearing pants. They’d just woken up a little while ago, she was still in his big T-shirt. The nickname ‘sasquatch’ wasn’t completely off. She looked up at him and brushed her hair out of her eyes, striding over to the bed, fighting the bad inside of her. She fought to keep her hips still, to keep from looking sexier than she should, from making Sam feel like an animal for wanting her. Because despite what Dean may have thought when he was alive, Ruby cared for Sam. At first, she hadn’t. At first, it was just a job. And then… He started to make her remember. Remember what it felt like to be human--to feel emotions, even the bad ones. She’d take pain any day over the monotonous physical pain of hell and her own dark instincts. Ruby sat cross-legged on the bed and watched Sam as he sat down at the disgusting table to start in on his meal, which was small and healthy as usual. She closed her eyes and laid back on the bed, trying not to sigh. She was tired of feeling so conflicted. Who was she supposed to serve? Sam? Her master? Herself? God? Her time in hell had made her hard. She felt evil, she was evil. But Sam had somehow brought her back to herself--her human self. She watched him run his hand through his hair (too long… maybe she’d get him to cut it eventually.) over her cheekbones.

“Alright, what’s going on, Ruby?” Sam’s deep voice reverberated in her chest, pulling at the honestly that wanted to come out. Pushing at the lies that were fighting.

“What do you mean, Sammy?” God damn that stupid smirk she felt on her face. She’d called him Sammy, as well. She waited for the glare she knew was coming. Only Dean was allowed to call him that… only Dean. And Dean was gone. On cue, Sam’s eyes raked up her body to her eyes. He was close, he’d moved and was now looming over her beside the bed.

“Don‘t you ever say that again.” Ruby looked up at him and licked her lips and felt strangely, dangerously close to tears. She had expected a glare from his dark blue eyes, but not the venom in his tone. He was frightening at times, and it was her fault. Her, and Azazel, and Lilith’s fault. She knew it wouldn’t be that hard to tip him over the edge… just one drink… just one exorcism. He’d feel the power and be unable to stay away. She knew him, the darkness inside of him on a level that no one else ever could. Because she had it, too.

“Sam,” she said softly, reaching up and placing her hand on his bicep. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say that.” Sam’s face didn’t soften or even acknowledge her words, his jaw still clenching and his hair falling into his eyes. Ruby applied pressure to his bicep, trying to bring him back. She knew he wanted to hurt her, something, anything. He’d lost Dean, the only thing he had left to live for. First Jess, then John, and then that werewolf bitch.
Sam became present in his rational mind once again; Ruby saw the anger shift to the back of his head as he focused on her. He was too sensitive for his own good, recognizing that he’d scared her, he immediately softened. He let out a ragged sigh and sat down on the bed, facing away from her. His head in his hands, shoulders slumped, tears threatening to leak out, Ruby sat up and wrapped her arms around him from behind. She wasn’t supposed to care about him… she couldn’t! She was a demon, she was supposed to be helping Lilith! And honestly, she didn’t care. She placed a kiss on the back of Sam’s neck and continued until he turned around and hovered over her on the bed. She’d get what she didn’t know she wanted; love. And he’d get the release she knew he needed.

Ruby made up her mind. She’d give him something to live for again.