Aiden

“Aiden, it’s your turn to talk.”

It’s Wednesday again.
I’m in the same chair. The same circle of people around me.
The same as it was two weeks ago.

The psychiatrist was staring at me intently.

I shifted uncomfortably in my chair.

The room was silent, except for the ticking of the clock and the sound of raindrops hitting the roof.

I glanced at the addict and he gave me an encouraging look.

I was about to speak, but…

‘Don’t talk…you’re not worth listening to…’

‘No one here cares about you, Aiden…don’t get your hopes up…’

I closed my mouth and brought my gaze to the ground.

Once again, the psychiatrist dismissed everyone but me.

He walked over to me and sat in the chair next to me.
Just like last time.

“Aiden, how would we know if you’re making any progress when you don’t say anything?”

I looked away from him, but he hooked a couple of fingers under my chin and turned my head to face him.

‘Get out of there…’

‘Leave…’

“I only want to help you, Aiden.”
He pulled his hand away from my face and placed it on my arm.

‘He’s dangerous…’

‘He only wants to hurt you…’

I didn’t move. I didn’t protest or fight back when he pressed his lips against mine.

‘Don’t let him do it!’

‘Not safe! Not safe!’

‘He’s only using you…Remember, he has a wife.’

The voices only grew louder and louder as he continued to kiss me.

‘What about Lucien? What would he think if he saw this?’

I turned my head away forcefully, breaking the kiss. I pushed him off of me and ran out the building, into the rain.

By the time I walked into the neighborhood, I was completely drenched in water, shivering from head to toe.

Lucien probably got tired of waiting and left. I wouldn’t blame him.
He has more important things to do and a loving boyfriend waiting for him at home.

‘Why would he wait for a whore like you? You let the psychiatrist tongue-fuck you in the mouth.’

I tried to ignore that and walked faster when my house was in sight.

To my surprise, Lucien was sitting on the front porch, holding an umbrella over his head.

He looked up and saw me, smiling instantly.
“It’s about time. I was starting to worry.”

Was he waiting for me this whole time?

“I brought some Chinese food…although it’s probably a little cold now…”

He was…

“I-I’m sorry…”

“It’s okay. Let’s go inside. You’re completely soaked and I don’t want you to catch a cold.”

I nodded and unlocked the door, opening it and walking inside.
Lucien closed his umbrella and followed suit.

“I’ll warm the food up while you go change, m’kay?”
I nodded again and slipped my shoes off, grabbing a pair of boxers from my room and then stepped into the bathroom.

I glanced at the pills on the counter.

What’s the point of taking them anymore?
The voices are still audible…

I took a quick shower, attempting to wash away the memories of what happened earlier.

I can still taste him in my mouth…

I finished drying my hair and walked out. Lucien was sitting at the table, eating shrimp-fried rice using chopsticks.

I sat in the seat in front of him and opened my box of food.
Lo Mein and beef with broccoli. He never fails to get me my favorite.

“Thank you…”
He nodded and gave me a small smile.

Why does he care so much…?

Is it even possible for someone to care so much…for another person?

‘You used to…back when your girlfriend and brother were still alive.’

My eyes widened and I tried to shake the voices away, but it didn’t work.

‘We shouldn’t tell him…’

‘Maybe we should…’

‘He has to learn the truth sometime…it’s been three years…’

“Stop it…”

‘He wouldn’t be able to live with himself…’

‘He’s a psychopath…I’m sure he enjoyed hearing them scream…’

“Stop it…!”

‘Who do you think your next victim will be, Aiden? The addict? The psychiatrist? Your precious Lucien?’

“Stop it!!!”

I shut my eyes tightly and clasped my hands over my ears.
I felt a hand on my head, petting my hair gently.

The voices stopped again…
I slowly opened my eyes to see Lucien standing in front of me, biting on his lip.

“It’s okay, Aiden. They’re not real. They’re not real…”

I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him tightly.
I just sat there and clung to him, like a child to his mother, as he continued to pet my hair.

I’m scared…I’m scared…

I’m scared.