We Are the Lovers, We Are the Last of Our Kind

Kellin’s P.O.V

I didn't sleep for the rest of that night. Mitch gave me my pill, promised me that he would take me to see Vic early in the morning and went back to sleep. I was left in Alan and Austin's room. I sat on the other bed and watched as they slept. That should be Vic and I right now.

After a few more hours of blankly staring at nothing. I looked out the window and saw the sky slightly beginning to lighten. Shortly after, Mitch came through the door in sweats and an old t shirt. Holding his keys in one hand and a jacket in the other.

"Ready to go?" He asked, his voice still scratchy from sleeping.

I nodded, unraveling myself from the blanket and setting it down on the bed.

"I brought you a hoodie... If you need it," Mitch said with his arm outstretched towards me.

"Thank you," I squeaked, throwing it on quickly, admiring how fluffy it was and how good it smelled.

It was so big on me that it stopped on my lower thigh. It was comforting.

Since I knew we had a long drive to the hospital I asked Mitch if I could go back to my room to grab Vic's iPod. I just wanted to see him already.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Once we get to the hospital Mitch told me to sit down while he found out where Vic's room was. My anxiety was at an all time high. He was taking a while talking to the nurse. What if something happened to Vic last night after he got to the hospital? He could have had another seizure. I had too many things swarming through my head at once and it made me feel like I was going to explode. I actually would be thankful for some of my anxiety medication at this moment.

Mitch finally came back and sat next to me.

"He's in room 2332 it's on the second floor. I'm going to let you go in by yourself first. So you can have alone time with him."

"Thank you," I whispered.

I shakily stood up and made my way to the elevators.

I just needed to know if he was ok. If I could I would take his place. I wouldn't mind suffering as long as he would be ok. It killed me to see all of the pain he was constantly in. He didn't deserve this, I did.

I gently pushed the button to open the elevator doors. They opened quickly. I stepped in and pressed number 2. There was a boy in there with me. He looked about my age, he was really skinny. I felt jealousy overcome me as I began to look over him. He had grayish blue eyes and long brown hair. He was sickeningly good looking, but not as attractive as my Vicky of course. I instantly felt self conscious. I wrapped my arms around myself in attempt to hide my hideous body.

"Hey," the boy said confidently.

"H-Hi," I said trying not to make eye contact.

"Who are you here to visit?"

"M-My boyfriend. Why a-are you here?"

"I volunteer here everyday, I clean up and stuff, I'm Lou by the way," he said, reaching out his hand.

"I'm K-Kellin," I said reaching to shake his hand, trying to make my hand stop trembling.

"Are you nervous or something?" He said looking at my hand.

I quickly retracted my hand and tucked both of them in the pocket of the hoodie. I faced forward and
silently wished for the doors to open.

"So-," he was interrupted by the bell signaling that the door was opening.

I quickly began to walk out.

"Hey, wait up," Lou said trying to keep up with me.

I continued to walk forward.

"It was really nice meeting you Kellin. I hope to see you around," he yelled down the hallway.

I didn't respond and continued to look for my boyfriend's room. Meeting new people made me nervous and I really didn't have time for it at the moment.

I eventually found room 2332 after getting lost about 4 times. I took a deep breath, scared about what I was going to walk in to.

I twisted the door handle and quietly made my way in. My eyes immediately went to Vic, in his hospital bed crying.

"B-Baby," I said trying to stay calm.

"Kells."

I rushed over to his side and embraced him.

"Why are you c-crying hun?"

"You weren't here for me when I woke up."

Guilt instantly washed over me and consumed my whole body. He was waiting on me. When I passed out and woke up in the hospital Vic was there the moment opened my eyes.

"B-Babe I'm sorry. They wouldn't let me go with you last night. I tried, I p-promise."

He just nodded, I had a feeling he didn't believe me. I was officially the worst boyfriend ever. I really tried to be there though. I knew he was upset. I could see it all over his face. He hadn't got much sleep either. I could tell by the dark circles under his eyes and his tear stained face. He looked even more sickly than he did before, his face was pale and his lips were dry. How did this all happen so fast?

"Can I get in with y-you? We can cuddle w-while we talk."

He nodded and moved to the side. I climbed up and got under the covers next to him. I wrapped my arms around him while he nestled his face into my chest.

"I love y-you," I whispered

"I love you too," he said with a scratchy voice.

We were silent for a while. I used my fingers to trace a patterns on the scars on his arms. I didn't get to see them much but they were pretty bad. There were words cut into them. I had the same thing but they weren't nearly as bad and they were on my thighs and only a little on my inner arms.

"You know, my parents didn't even come to see me. Mitch told them and they refused to come or even have a conversation over the phone with me," Vic said with a blank stare.

"I'm so s-sorry Vic, I really am. I wish I could h-help," I said feeling hopeless.

He grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly. He paused as if he were trying to find the right words to say.

"Kells, I don't think I'm going to make it through this."

My heart stopped. If he didn’t have any hope then it would be even harder for me to be optimistic.

“W-What do you mean Vicky? Don’t s-say that,” I rushed.

“I’m being realistic.”

“N-No you’re not. Don’t even think like that.”

He sighed gently.

He’s given up already. He’s lost hope.