Loverboy

“You’re lying, tell me you’re just making this up!” the news that I just recieved was too shocking for me to handle.

“Yes, Josh, I am infact telling you the truth. The school that you used to go to was by far more ahead than this one so your scores are much higher than any other student’s here. In conclusion, you are capable to finish sixth form one month prior to the end of school year. Would you like to like to finish early or finish like the rest of the students?” the headteacher asked me.

“Um, is-is it okay if you give me until the end of the day to come up with my decision?” I asked. He nodded and handed me a few pieces of paper with all the information for both decisions.

Ending sixth form one month early was going to be a big step in my music career. I would be able to return home to London and see my mates again and it would be a headstart to the band. But it’s the middle of March for crying out loud. The least they could’ve done is tell me this in February or something; not give me this packet and expect me to have a final decision by tonight. What’s worse is that I had to choose between music career or staying with Oliver. He needed me and I needed him. If I decide to stay, it’s going to hold back our band. But if I leave, I’m going to lose all of his trust in me. Fucking hell I even promised to stick with him until the end and now look at me.

I threw the papers down on the desk as soon as I got back in my dorm. It’s a Saturday afternoon for christ’s sake and I’m stuck spending it by deciding a life changing event. Even if I leave, I’m not going to stop talking to Oliver. We’re definitely going to keep in touch no matter what happens.

I skimmed down the white slip of paper. Not a single line for signature was spotted. It was probably just information about if I leave or stay. There’s so many things we could get done if I finish school early, but then what would Oliver do? He told me him and Tom are now talking again so I guess his brother will be there. We also have each other’s phone numbers so I can call or text him everyday. Come on, it won’t be that bad if I leave. If the band becomes famous one day, I’ll bring him on tour with us and brag about how adorable we are. Well that made me sound like a thirteen-year-old white girl. Wait don’t I need my mum’s approval? No, I’m technically an adult so that won’t be necessary. But it won’t hurt to call her before I make my decision.
Grabbing my phone, I scrolled down my contacts until I found her and pressed the green Call button.

“Hello?” her voice came up.

“Oh, h-hi, mum.” I stuttered. Round of applause for not having the guts to talk to my mum. “Listen, something really important came to me today and I need your help.

“What is it?”

“My headteacher told me that my scores are so advanced that I was able to graduate at the end of April. He was kind enough to allow me to stay at the boarding school or finish it early. I want to move back down to London as soon as possible but I don’t want to leave my friends.” I explained. It seems like as I tell her more details, the more I want to stay.

“If you choose to leave, do I have to come down and sign papers?” she asked.

“No, they’re letting me make the decision. But you do need to come get me on my final day, obviously. I just don’t really know what to do.”

“Do what’s best for you. If you want to start the band out earlier, by all means leave the school and come back to London. No one’s pressuring you but yourself.” YOU’RE NOT FUCKING HELPING ME.

“Okay, I’ll think about it and call you tomorrow about what I decided. Love you, bye.” I said and clicked End Call. I think right now I’ll just read over the paper and decide later.

It’s only 19:40 anyway and the office doesn’t close until 21:00 so I have enough time of crying and kicking the wall repeatedly.

Students may not switch decisions once he has signed the papers. If the student chooses to stay, they will continue in all projects and activities like every other peer until the year ends. However, if the student decides to finish early, they will have turn in all textbooks, lock, dorm key, and any lunch fees one week prior to their scheduled date. There will be no mini graduation party for the student, all they will receive is a certificate of graduation on their last day. Parents/guardians do not have to sign any papers but they are allowed if they want to. Student’s signature is due by 20:50, ten minutes until school office closes the day they are given this packet.

Well.

Isn’t that fantastic.

Hold the fuck up, I don’t get a party for finishing sixth form before all of these twats? This school sucks. Maybe I can just take Oliver with me since not even the teachers care for him. Dammit, I forgot he has Tom now. Hah, he’ll never choose Tom over me.

A knock from my door was able to interrupt my thoughts about the future. It definitely wasn't Oliver since he has the same damn key so. I looked through the small peephole and saw that it was Alex and Jack outside. It's like one of them ends up coming to my dorm room whenever I'm going through a crisis. Like that one time Alex helped me with the band name the last day of Fall break. He even helped me improve Contagious Chemistry so I owe him one. "What's up, Franceschi?" Jack said when I opened the door.

"Oh." I paused. "I don't even know."

"Why's that?" Alex asked as he walked into my dorm room. Yes, your majesty, please come right in uninvited like you own the fucking place. Calm down, Josh, they're your friends and this could help get your mind off of things for the moment.

"Our headteacher said that my scores are so advanced I was given the option to either finish sixth form a month early or stay until school ends for every other student here. I'm thinking about staying but what if the band gets held back? Stupid how I'm overreacting about a month's difference but it can probably change a lot of things. I have until 20:50 for my final decision and I'm just stressing out about it." I said, handing Alex the packet.

"Looks like you're in deep shit, Josh." he chuckled. "Does Oliver know about it?"

"He's hardly ever at school over the weekend now because he's home with Tom. The closest time he'll know is tomorrow afternoon which is my guess. He's going to be fucking pissed off if I decide to leave."

"Oliver? No, he'll understand."

"He gets emotional whenever we say goodbye before school break happens. Leaving a month early? Yeah, he'll most likely kill himself." Okay, so maybe I over exaggerated right there but I wasn't lying about the school break part. We'll definitely still keep in touch through cellphones but it just won't feel the same. “Have you ever had a choice between two things and just couldn't decide?" I asked them.

"It happens when we take multiple choice questions in Biology class but not in the real life for me." said Jack. Thank you so much for the advice. Alex laughed and gave him a small push as he handed me the packet back.

"Honestly, Josh. What's the worst thing Oliver's going to do? Sure he'll be sad but it's not like it's forever or anything. You two will most likely meet up once he finishes school anyway so you don't need to worry about it. Why don't you call and ask him?" Alex suggested. I think I'd rather stick my face into a pot of boiling water but thank you for the offer, I appreciate it.

"I think I just need some time alone." I mumbled whilst looking down at the packet. Both of them nodded and closed the door behind them as they left my dorm room.

Alex is right, though. Oliver and I will see each other again someday. But just leaving him here and back home with his parents makes my stomach churn. The fact that he has the guts to even go to that place every weekend is insane. His parents probably work a lot over the weekend so he hardly sees them anyhow. Tom probably protects him or they leave the house for the majority of the day. Okay that's enough of mentally getting into their sibling lives, I need to focus on this fucking paper.

This isn't even a topic that anyone should be making such a huge deal over. Sure if all of my friends went to the same school, I'd choose to finish early but having a boyfriend in Sheffield and childhood friends in London is hard to keep up with. That reminds what would even happen between Oliver and I if I finished early? Would the two of us still be dating or would we have to end it? No, thinking negatively won't help me through this. Luckily there is pros and cons in everything. The pro if I leave is getting the band started early, the con is leaving my boyfriend in Sheffield. The pro in staying is being with Oliver and the con is holding back on the band. Hell yea, I'm so professional.

Wait didn't my mum sent me here because of how shitty my scores were. And then suddenly I have the highest scores in the boarding school? WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING, I CAN'T LEAVE MY BOYFRIEND HERE WITH THE SHIT TEACHERS AND TWAT-MINDED STUDENTS EVERYWHERE. Never mind, he has Alex and Jack to hang out with. Does he even like them? But then he won't have a flatmate to be with. Our conversations will be text messages since he can't stand talking on the phone. Perhaps once school ends I can come back and bring him to London. Oliver really needs to leave this small place and I'll let him choose the flat he wants to live in. I've already been looking online for decent sized flats with a good price in London and I was able to schedule a time in the beginning of June to look at them. One of them allows pets and I want a pug when I move out.

What does this have anything to do with my current struggle at the moment. First I was talking about not leaving Oliver and then suddenly I'm talking about flats and pugs? How the hell are my scores in the advanced category. Someone needs to check with the school board and see what's up because someone clearly favours me.

I glanced over at the clock. 20:35. Great. Just fucking great. Fifteen minutes until my time expires so I should probably get going down to the office. Hilarious because I don't even know my decision but whatever.

--

My feet immediately stopped moving when I got in front of the headteacher's office. And do I have a final decision? Fuck no, I'm just saying the first answer that comes to my mind. I slowly opened the door and peeked my head through. "Joshua Franceschi!" he said from his desk. "You may come in." A deep sigh escaped from my mouth as I closed the door and sat down in front of his desk. He had a bright smile on his face but it was obvious that he was faking it. Hah, he's probably pissed off because I waited until the last minute to do this. "May I have the papers back?"

"Y-yes, sir." I stuttered, handing the packet to him. "I gave a lot of thought into this so I apologize for being so late." I lied. Thought? Nah, I just kept saying shit in my head and then Alex and Jack show up so that makes it all better!

"No need to apologize, Josh. This isn't the first time a sixth form student has had these choices and procrastinated." my headteacher said, getting two sheets of paper. "Both of these papers are waiting for us to sign them. Whichever one you don't choose will be thrown away and the one you do choose will be sent to the district. Take your time if you need to think again."

"No, please. I've already made my decision." I said. My heart beating so fucking fast at the moment.

"Oh really? What's your decision then?" DON'T DO THAT, IT MAKES EVERYTHING WORSE.

I took a deep breath in and made one final thought.

"I'll finish early."

Remember when I said Oliver would choose me over Tom?

Yeah, well.

I chose a music career over him.