The Grim Goodbye

Oh my eyes. Oh closing slowly

I sat in the back of my math class. I tried so hard to get the voices to leave me alone. Nothing worked.

Don't you try to take me down, don't you try to take me over, won't you try to break me?

I sang this to my self. They can't and they won't take over me.

"Go away," I whispered.

The complexities moving in, and I feel that I do not have the strength,

I left the class just like that, no warning to the teacher, I left I can't fight them; my demons. Not here.

tragedies plaguing me solemnly
It's affecting my will

As I walked down the halls to leave my school the events of the last year ran through my head. The rape, abuse, and the Death of my sister. She was my only real friend.

But wait, now that I've found you, situations from dark now change to gray

But perhaps there's a way. If I leave this hell whole I can be with her in the heavens.

Disregarding my absence of memories, it's perpetually blinding me of sanity,

I remember what she told me before she died "Don't let them get you," She whispered. I disregarded those thoughts and was close to home knowing were my dad kept his gun.

and just when I'm giving in, as I try to scale these walls
Jericho falls around me, and I feel that I've strayed too long

I Brought the gun to my head and just as I was about to pull the trigger I hear a scream and saw a flash as my mom pushed the gun from my head, but I still got shot.

And darkness is fading in, and darkness is real

Oh my eyes, oh closing slowly, I try

I felt my body collapse and my mom calling an ambulance.
"Baby stay with me," She whispered, but my eyes were already closing.

Fate seems to recreate,
I just cannot escape,

I saw her.
It was so dark and all I saw was my sister.

Something holds me down and makes me act a way I can't explain

I couldn't bring my self to look at her I died because I gave up she died by fate.
I'm so selfish.

Even now I can feel it coming over me choking me, as I'm falling behind

She was gone and I felt like I was being suffocated.

You can say you know me, but you have no clue what my dreams could show you

I screamed no one could help me because no one knew what the hell I felt and thought and screamed and dreamed No fucking one.

And darkness is fading in, and darkness is real

Oh my eyes, oh closing slowly
I try

I felt the images of my sister disappear and i felt my self yet again slipping away from what I thought was reality.

I
Can't
Can't win
...Tell me what you see.

I can’t do this. Is this fucking hell I just want to be gone hell is pretty shitty if this is what it does.

I feel something deep inside me,
I feel deep inside...me!
I feel something deep inside me, and I can't let this go, whoa,
I feel something deep inside me, and I can't let this go, whoa,

I felt her, heard her whispering to me that I could do this. I had to do this, if not for me for her.

Lie, as I try to steer clear, and I try to stay sober
This is taking me over,
And my dreams complicate it...

They always say not to go to the light but I did. I knew it was a lie. The light got brighter and brighter till I was almost blind. I saw my moms face and she cried.

I just cannot let this go
I tried so many times to tell you
I just I cannot let this go,
I just cannot win

She said she was sorry and how she’s leaving him and she’s a horrible mom for just watching as He beat me. I heard her voice and the blinding light and fallowed it.

I see you
I see you...you falling away
I see you...you
You... killing me softly
I see you...you falling away
I see you...you...you

I opened my eyes slowly and my moms face began to appear but blurry and she smiled. Then I turned my head and saw some one who seemed so familiar but I couldn't put my finger on it.
Then it dawned on me that face how could I forget the guy I've been crushing on for years now.

Don't take what's in front of me, open eyes can see I have everything
Tell you; don't take what's in front of me, tell you, don't take what's in me

He did something unexpected. He hugged me and whispered something "I should have told you before,"
What does he have to tell me?
"Maybe if I told you I loved you, you wouldn't have tried that shit," Yeah nothing could have stop- wait did he just say he loved me?

Lie, which one lied?
When I feel this come away,
Way-ooahh, that's why I try...lie

No he’s lying. He is just fucking with my head. He cant love me know one loves me.

I see you coming my way, dreams may fall more everyday, but I see you looking my way

He kissed me and I knew he wasn't lying. I saw the bullet wound in my arm and back at him and he kissed me once more and I thought maybe I should try this little game once more.

And I've tried just to separate dreams from reality
Try to satisfy this wanting,
Try to stay righteous, try to stay sober, but then, I can't win

My eyes went wide. A gun was behind his back. He grinned and shot my mom. He pointed it towards me. "You don't deserve to live.”

And I know you, and I know you, and I know you...

The guy turned and walked away at the two dead bodies and passed the mirror and nearly screamed. How does this make sense I just killed my mom and myself? He looked at the dead forms and gasped when he did not see himself and his mom but his sister and his mom.

Then he woke up and what he saw disgusted him. He was lying in bed covered in blood. His mom and sister lay dead and all you saw was blood and cocaine. He didn't recall what he did and only the drugs new.

He put the gun two his head like in his dream then screamed one word while he pulled the trigger. They said that this shit would help.

LIE!