I Feel It in My Bones

I slid my headphones over my ears, I sighed as the sounds of the street around me was blocked out. The only thing I could hear was the clear vocals of my favourite band, I smiled to myself as I pulled my hoodie tighter around myself.

Music is my security blanket, when I listen to it I feel safe, I know these bands will never betray me, they respect my opinions, they love the fact that I'm so dedicated to them. These bands know that I give them my everything, I've dedicated years of my life to them, and I know for a fact that none of these bands will ever truly leave me.

As the familiar tune of My Chemical Romance's Planetary (Go!) rang through my ears. I smiled and felt my pace quicken, the people I walked past looked at me weirdly. I was well aware that I was smiling to myself but then again, I couldn't give a stuff.

These people mean everything to me, I love them with all my heart, I thought about this as the vocals echoed inside my head.

There might be something outside your window
But you just never know
There could be something right past the turnpike gates
But you'll just never know

I smiled at the familiar lyrics as I sang along inside my head. I found myself walking in time with the beat, my heart was beating and my head was engulfed in the sound. I grabbed a lamppost on the corner and swung myself around on it before continuing with my speed walking.

If my velocity starts to make you sweat,
Then just don't let go
And if their Heaven ain't got a vacancy
Then we just, then we just, then we just
Then we just get up and go!

I grinned as the chorus was heard. It make me feel good and gave me tingles through my skin, there are those songs that give you goosebumps and reminds you of certain events. Well, Planetary is my song, it reminds me of good times and makes me feel good.

Ladies and gentlemen:
Truth is now acceptable
Fame is now injectable
Process the progress
This core is critical
Faith is unavailable
Lives become incredible
Now, please understand that,

I mouthed the lyrics along with Gerard and nodded my head, I turned down my street and felt the spring in my step as the rest of the song blared through my ears. I felt the urge to turn it up louder but I realised it was on its highest setting.

I can't slow down
I won't be waiting for you
I can't stop now
Because I'm dancing
This planet's ours to defend
Ain't got no time to pretend
Don't fuck around,
This is our last chance

I unlocked my front door and turned off my iPod. I ran up the stairs to my bedroom and grabbed the laptop from under the bed. I'd only listened to half of the song I needed more music to satisfy my craving. I needed to feel everything that the songwriter felt and every emotion that they poured into every song.

I opened up youtube and typed in "Awaken The Empire" I love this band, they were relatively new to me but I responded to their lyrics, when I listen to music I find a connection with each individual band member. I love exploring the diversity of every band and finding my perfect sound.

I clicked on to the link for "Cross My Heart" I impatiently waited for it to buffer, I folded my arms until I heard the song start. I stood up and jumped around my room in anticipation. I sang along to the lyrics.

"The story takes place in our hearts
Where no one else can see us
We are alone
We're far from all we know
Should we fight to keep this
Should we fight to breathe in
Should we fight what we don't know
Or maybe we don't care
Maybe we don't," I sang and clutched at my shirt feeling every word of the song. I felt the impact it was having on me as my eyes filled with tears.

In my world there are two types of songs, the ones that make you feel happy and carefree and the ones that affect you in every way possible, these songs have the power to reduce you to tears and also to make you remember the worst and best of times.

The songs that influence me the most have the power to change my views on a band forever, if a song can make me cry then it has a massive impact on me.

"Cross my heart and hope you're always there
Cross my heart and hope you're always there

All I want is for you to believe that
All I want is you surrounding me

Cross my heart" I smiled shakily thinking of the people that I lost in my life, the elderly, the people who I'd simply quarrelled with and the ones who had ignored me. The people I had loved and lost, these were the things that triggered my emotions.

It was like the bands knew, and when I listened to music I didn't even mind crying, I didn't mind people seeing me cry over music. They saved me from myself and they make me feel better about myself as a person, I'm more confident with their help.

"The story unfolds and reveals
The lies that you told
You're choking all I know
Should I fight to keep this
Should I fight to breathe in
Should I fight you letting go
Maybe I don't care
Maybe I don't

Maybe I don't

Cross my heart and hope you're always there
Cross my heart and hope you're always there" I smiled feeling the tears run down my face freely. My voice cracked but my cares had floated away with the lyrics passing through my lips.

I love having the sound fill me up, it fills my heart to bursting point and then when it goes it feels incredible. All of my worries left my system at once and I felt free, the music lets me be me.

"Have you been crying?" I looked to my door to see my best friend peering in smirking at me. I shook my head in denial and felt my cheeks redden as I pressed pause. I'd finish what I started later.

Music is my escape. My release from myself. The music will never leave me, abandon me in times of need or walk all over me like people will.