Let Me Be the One

Something weird was happening to me. I feel fine most of the time, but on random times throughout the day, I just start vomiting. And then I'll feel fine again and then I'll start puking again. I had to be sent home from work because I had to run away from some girls or else my lunch would end up on their shirts.

It's not like their lunches weren't already dripping down their chins. One of the older ones gave her little sister a hamburger to shut her up and Mandy had to bring a mop around after to get all the lettuce off the floor.

Anyway, I think I caught something from Mrs. Brown. She hasn't been feeling well lately and a few times the nurse has sent me home because she wasn't well enough to visit.

So now, I'm laying on my bed at home, trying to think of what was wrong with me but nothing was coming to mind. At first I was freaking out because I thought that I was pregnant, but the two tests I took came back negative. And then I thought that it was a flu but I realized I probably would have more symptoms than just vomiting.

It could have been something I ate...

But then again, it's probably Mrs. Browns fault.

I groaned out in boredom as I rolled off my bed and shuffled over the the washroom. Damn, I had to pee. Probably from the million glasses of orange juice I drank to get enough to pee of the damn pregnancy test.

It was times like these that I really wished I had Frank and Tom. I hadn't realized how actually alone I was until I found myself wishing for company.

It had been six agonizingly long weeks after that day in the diner. I had tried to keep in touch with the boys, other than Frank, but that slowly ended. Starting with the one worded texts from Mikey, then the phone calls lessening from Gerard until there were none and finally, Ray and I just gave up. I never was really friends with Bob but the fact that I lost three good friends with Frank, hurt.

But now, I was finally feeling a little better. Well, not health-wise clearly, but that period in my life just seemed like a distant memory that was nice while it lasted. Every so often, I would get little reminders like when I looked out my window and saw Frank talking to Mrs. Brown on the porch, but other than that, I was fine.

I sighed as I hit the power button on my TV and started flipping through channels. I came across a cartoon with cute little animals, and started to watch that for reasons unknown to me. That is, until one of the squirrels faces fell off and some blue moose was stabbed to death by a crazy green chipmunk. That's when I changed the channel.

"Americans and their creepy networking..." I muttered as I continued to change channels.

I finally got to MTV where a very fine looking Adam Levine was strutting his stuff. And let me tell you, that man can definitely strut!

The music video ended and I found myself gaping at Frank Iero's face as Gerard screamed into the microphone. Frank was on MTV... OH MY GOSH, I WAS BEST FRIENDS WITH A CELEBRITY!

"Forget about the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took..." Gerard sang as the other members rocked out in the back. By now, I was leaping around, screaming at the top of my lungs as I watched the people who were once my close friends, sound like magic on that small stage.

"How did I not know about them?" I yelled as the chorus started. The words were kind of depressing and I almost wanted to call Gerard right then and there and ask him if there was something he wanted to tell me, but the tune was cheery and I just wanted to dance!

Frank wasn't kidding when he said he was on MTV!

I finally couldn't take it anyone and grabbed my phone off the couch on searched for Rays number. He was probably my closest friend out of all of them. Gerard and I were a little detached after I pretty much told Frank that we weren't friends. Ray understood though.

"Hello?" Ray answered.

"You fucker! You're on MTV!" I screamed, not bothering with the pleasantries. It had been about two weeks since I had last talked to Ray and I knew that it was going to be a little awkward, but I just couldn't pass this up! "I knew you were in a band, but you guys are amazing! You look- oh wow!"

"Vee? Are you okay? I can't hear what you're saying but I hear screaming..."

"I am literally watching you right now on MTV!" I stated and heard a chuckle from Ray on the other line. Ray was playing his little solo thing as I watched in awe, "Oh my, you're like a guitar genius!"

The music died out and by now I was out of breath from all the screaming as I plopped down on the couch. I felt my bladder tingle, "Ah, fuck, I have to pee again. That's what I get for drinking an entire carton of orange juice." I muttered.

I heard laughter from the other end. A suspiciously girly laughter. "Wait, who the fuck was that?"

"You know Therese, right?" Ray asked.

"No." I answered bluntly and there was a pause.

"Oh... she was the brunette at the club. She was with Violet, the blonde? Ring any bells?" Ray urged and it dawned on me. She and Ray must have gotten together.

"Oh, yup, hey Therese." I greeted and I heard a sweet voice say hello back. "but seriously though, I'm about to piss myself so I gotta go."

"Why did you drink so much juice anyway?" Ray asked.

"I didn't have enough pee in me for the two pregnancy tests I took." I replied without thinking. There was a crash on the other line and lots of shouting.

"YOU'RE PREGNANT?!" Ray roared.

"No! They were negative! Sorry, sorry, I forgot to tell you that part! I just thought that I was getting morning sickness but I think I just picked something up from the neighbor. I'm fine. No baby coming anytime soon." I promised.

There was a sigh of relief. I crossed my legs to stop from peeing, "Okay, I am actually hanging up this time though because I am about to make a stain on my couch. Now, bye."

"Talk to-" I had already hung up.

I practically ran to the bathroom and barely made it before I released everything. I REALLY had to go. After washing up, I decided to head over to Mrs. Browns and blame her for my sickness. Hopefully I could actually see her this time.

I finger combed all the knots out of my blonde locks quickly before slipping into a black leather jacket and some navy blue TOMS. It was slowly but surely getting colder out and I was dreading the day when the snow came to Jersey.

I bounded down the steps and down the sidewalk to Mrs. Browns house. Snugs was barking like crazy, but for once, he wasn't standing in the yard while doing it. He was inside.

Shrugging it off, I opened the gate and entered the house through the back like I usually did. I frowned when I saw that the elderly woman wasn't in her usual spot. Maybe there was a breeze through the window?

A bad feeling washed over my body as I followed the sound of Snugs barking to Mrs. Browns bedroom. She was rarely in there because the lighting was too dim and she liked reading in front of the natural light.

I half expected to see Mrs. Brown laying in her bed, screaming at her dog to shut up as he barked to get her up. But what I saw was so much worse.

Mrs. Brown lay face down on the ground with Snugs standing over her, howling to try and get someone to save his owner. "Shit!" I cursed as I rushed to her motionless body, 911 already getting dialed.

I flipped her over to see her brown eyes were already slightly open and her mouth was forming one word over and over again. Randy, Randy, Randy, Randy...

"Stay with me, Hilda." I pleaded, using her first name for the first time in... Ever.

The operator finally picked up. "911, what's your emergency?"

"I found my quadriplegic neighbor face down on the ground. Please hurry!" I rushed, giving her Mrs. Browns information as I held her head in my lap.

I hung up just before the tears started slipping out. I was stroking the gray hair out of Mrs. Browns face as they dropped from my eyes and onto the brown carpet. "Please don't leave, you're all I have left..."

Mrs. Brown had a faint smile plastered on her face, "Don't worry, I'm coming Randy."

I shook her slightly, "No! Not Randy! Come back here! To me! To Vera! I'm not ready for you to leave yet!" I cried. "I have no one else."

Mrs. Browns eyes focused on me, as if she were just noticing me there for the first time. Her smile grew as her brown eyes searched my blue ones. "You aren't alone, Vera. You just need to know where to look." she whispered.

I choked on a sob. "I don't know where to look though!"

She didn't answer. I shook her again and tried to get a reaction but her eyes were glazed over and her chest stopped rising and falling. "No..." I whimpered. "Don't go."

But I could already tell by the way her muscles were frozen in place and her glassy eyes stared at the roof, she was already gone. The last person who truly cared. Gone.

Footsteps came thundering down the hall and paramedics came into view as I looked up from the motionless body laying in my arms. Their shoulders slumped in lost hope as they sadly shook their heads, confirming my beliefs. She was dead.

They carefully took her from my arms and a nice lady led me back to my house, explaining how Mrs. Brown could have rolled over in her sleep and wasn't able to get back up. I argued that she didn't have any movement below her neck and it wasn't possible for her to roll. They just gave me some shitty answer.

"These things just happen."

They asked me to give any names of relatives but I only had friends of hers that I could call to deliver the bad news. After the lady finally left, I walked like a robot up to my room and sat down carefully on my bed, pulling out my phone and dialing in a number that I hadn't used for weeks.

"Yup?" he answered.

"hey, um Frank? It's Vee. I have some bad news."